Chatty Parishioners

[Dorothy]

I think a nun unintentionally clanking her rosary beads on the back of a pew is a lot different from the stupid chatter that goes in Church today. I admit, it does give you a lot to offer up, but admonishing a sinner and instructing the ignorant are spiritual works of mercy. So perhaps we should make up cards that say something like, “instructing the ignorant” is a spiritual work of mercy-I wanted to inform you that it is rude and disrespectful to God and your fellow brethern to talk before Mass. Then you could just hand these cards off to the fellow chatter.

Okay, I know that won’t work but really how much are we supposed to take? I went to Church about a month ago and this couple–husband and wife in their late forties and early fifties talked ALL during Communion. The priest took an extremely long time to pass out Communion to the Eucharistic ministers (about five minutes) so the Communion song had not begun yet. And all during those five minutes the couple kept talking about FOOTBALL. So finally, I did ask them to be quiet. And CAT had a great point. It just made me upset to do that and sort of angry. But then again, I have to wonder, why do the talkers always sit by me in Church?

The circumstances you describe above certainly warranted your asking them to be quiet. I think I would have almost burst if I didn’t do the same as you did…particularly during a quiet church while receiving the Eucharist!
I agree that to be patient with someone inadvertently clanking there rosary beads on the pew is a whole lot different than requesting respect for our Lord’s Presence of a couple who are talking about football.

 

[Cat]

I think a nun unintentionally clanking her rosary beads on the back of a pew is a lot different from the stupid chatter that goes in Church today. I admit, it does give you a lot to offer up, but admonishing a sinner and instructing the ignorant are spiritual works of mercy. So perhaps we should make up cards that say something like, “instructing the ignorant” is a spiritual work of mercy-I wanted to inform you that it is rude and disrespectful to God and your fellow brethern to talk before Mass. Then you could just hand these cards off to the fellow chatter.

Okay, I know that won’t work but really how much are we supposed to take? I went to Church about a month ago and this couple–husband and wife in their late forties and early fifties talked ALL during Communion. The priest took an extremely long time to pass out Communion to the Eucharistic ministers (about five minutes) so the Communion song had not begun yet. And all during those five minutes the couple kept talking about FOOTBALL. So finally, I did ask them to be quiet. And CAT had a great point. It just made me upset to do that and sort of angry. But then again, I have to wonder, why do the talkers always sit by me in Church?

You ask how much we are supposed to take? How much did Christ take? I mentioned in another thread on this forum that I doubt it was quiet while He was dying on the cross.

Certainly, if you are able to ask people to be quiet with an attitude of total charity, with NO personal stake in the asking–i.e., you are totally concerned with helping others to be more perfect and you do not have any personal motives or desires for peace and quiet–then go for it. If you don’t have a plank, then it’s OK to take the speck out of someone else’s eye. But I know for me, any such shushing attempting would be for selfish motives so that I could experience quiet. I would not dare to tell someone else to be quiet because I know that I have two planks, one in each eye, and giant two-by-fours in my ears and a railroad tie in my mouth!

Try to take the most charitable viewpoint. It is entirely possible that the couples’ son was on that football team (especially if it was a local game), and they were excited, just as a couple holding a baby seldom pays much attention to the homily, the hymns, and sometimes, even the Lord Himself. They are caught up in the wonder of their child. We forgive them easily for that. Forgive the football couple, too.

And sometimes, even though other Christians can’t even comprehend such a thing, certain events of this world means so much to someone else that they can’t stop thinking about the event or even talking about it, even in the Presence of the Lord of Heaven and Earth in the Most Holy Sacrifice of the Mass.

When our daughter got married, The Wedding dominated our thoughts and lives. I remember going to Mass, but I remember thinking about The Wedding an awful lot during those Masses.

Again, we need to forgive each other–these are human failings. Although much that is on this earth is sin-stained and hideous, there is still much that is beautiful and uplifting, and IMO, football is one of those things! Yes, football! For me, it’s figure skating–the beauty of the edge is heaven to me. Strange as it may seem to you and others, it’s very difficult for us as humans to be totally detached from the beautiful things of this earth, even during Mass. Again, watch the couples with young children and babies–they are most certainly NOT totally detached and they are most certainly NOT concentrating completely on the Lord’s Holy Sacrifice, and that’s OK.

Another possibility is that perhaps the couple was there to show their utter disrespect for the Catholic Church (like the ACTUP group does). Well, show them through your actions what being Catholic and Christian means. Ignore their attempts to disrupt and treat them with complete kindness. If they are not Christians, then sin means nothing to them and therefore, any attempt to instruct them about sin will likely fall on deaf ears. Until they convert to Christianity, it is rather pointless to expect them to renounce sin. Again, if you have a totally self-less motive and just want to fulfil your Spiritual Work of Mercy by instructing them, that’s great. But if there is any motive of personal gain in yourself, then I would question speaking up to others about their speck when there is a plank in your own eye. If they are confronted by many quiet people who ignore them and concentrate on the Lord, the intentional disrupters may realize that they are being boorish and accomplishing nothing, and they may back off. I guess I really see no reason for a confrontation that may drive them further away from the Lord and His Church. Perhaps a quiet look around and a smile and a welcoming nod would be more effective than a verbal rebuke and admonition.

As for why talkers always sit next to you in church–two possibilities. First, you NOTICE every noise–that is a flaw in YOU. Second, the Lord wants to eliminate that flaw in you, so He places you next to people who will test you and help you to develop a more peacable spirit that does not notice when others do it wrong. When the Lord wants us to develop a virtue, He doesn’t just give it to us–He puts us in situations where we can practice and perfect that virtue! So be grateful that the Lord is answering your prayers asking Him to make you perfect! He’s doing just that. If you are seated next to quiet people who don’t challenge you, then you can cry out to God, “Why have you abandoned me?!” Get up and move to sit next to someone who is chatting, texting, doodling, sleeping (and snoring), or in some other way showing disrespect to the Lord in the Blessed Sacrament, and ask the Lord to develop patience and love for others in You!

 

[Mrs_Sally]

Absolutely beautiful! We are all sinners and we all need to be humble and pray for one another.

A wise man once told me, “No humility, no holiness. no holiness, no heaven.” and those are words that I truly try to live by. I wasn’t trying to state that anyone should have to leave the church to go pray elsewhere, but if they are that upset while they are in prayer, I don’t think thats a good & healthy thing either. The church is not a museum for Saints, it is a hospital for sinners, and we should not be looking down on others because they are having fellowship after Mass. It is noted that Jesus often went off by himself to pray, and it was also never recorded in Scared Scripture that Jesus was angry with anyone because they were talking, etc, while he was in prayer. I do understand that people do get a bit too chatty before Mass sometimes, and people talking during Mass can absolutely make my blood want to boil at times, but what would you rather see? Would you rather see people receiving Communion & then walking straight out of the church? Would you rather see people damn near trampling each other to get out of church & cutting each other off in the parking lot after Mass, right after receiving Jesus in the Eucharist. I have many sins to atone for & many of my own problems to work on, but I don’t see much humility in getting mad at people who are sticking around after Mass and talking for a while. I used to let these things bother me much more, until I realized that I am no better than any of these people. I am a sinner in need of Gods mercy, just like everyone else in that church. How can one piece of dust feel like it is somehow more superior than the other piece of dust? I hope that this clarifies what I was trying to say in the first place, and better explains the sentiment that I was expressing.

 

[Mrs_Sally]

Also a beautiful thought. “Offering it up” is truly the only solution.

For some reason, this thread and this whole topic is bothering me more today than it usually does.

I grew up Evangelical Protestant and we used to use the following expression–“leave it at the altar.”

I know, it’s not that easy. You take this problem up to the altar and leave it with Jesus, then you turn to go away, but you run back and pick the problem back up and once again, you’re burdened with it.

Well, try to really leave it at the altar this time. I’ve read so many of these threads, and never have I seen any truly effective way to deal with chatty parishioners in Mass. Some of you feel comfortable turning and shushing other fellow human beings. Most of us do not.

I think that once you have shared your concern with the priest, that’s all you can do and you need to let go and let God.

You have to start working on YOURSELF, not others. You have to try to find the quiet place inside your own soul to retreat to rather than wishing that everyone else in the world would give you that quiet place outside in this world.

Yes, certainly you SHOULD be able to pray in the Church in peace and quiet. You really should. Gol ding it all, people should shut up and be quiet in a Catholic Church, dag nab it!

But it’s not going to happen. It really isn’t. Face it. Railing about it here isn’t going to make it happen. You can shush all through the Mass, but I’m willing to bet you a Cadbury egg that within five minutes, the chatterers will be chatting again. You’re just torturing yourself. You can blame whatever for the chatting problem in the Church, but that doesn’t make it go away, does it?

Just learn to change yourself and find quiet in the midst of the noise. God is perfectly capable of dealing with the chatterers.

 

[Saint_wannabe]

Mrs Sally, Thank you for the kind words, and I also really liked what Cat had to say in post no# 42. Hey Cat, I really like the part about the giant 2 x 4’s and the railroad ties. LOL!!! I can relate.

 

[adstrinity]

Quite simply, as others have stated, ask them to please be quiet. If they don’t, well, that’s on them. Pray for them.

And, for a laugh, rev-know-it-all.com/2008/2008—05-11.html

 

[cctabb]

Things you can do to put an end to this:

Pray that the Holy Spirit move these chatters to be quiet.
Speak to your parish priest. (About once a year our priest gives the quiet speech.)
Offer it up
Give the offending party “the look,” and hope they catch it
Politely ask for quiet.

Another thought - if father does not want to address it during mass times, maybe the proper etiquette can be posted in the bulletin

 

[Middleman]

I already attend the early Mass just for that reason. Plus, this particular Mass is filled with people who are old enough to know better (people in their sixties, seventies and eighties). Due to the way the church is layed out, there is no quiet corner.

They are probably lonely and before Mass is a time to connect with their Catholic friends.

 

[Lost_Again]

You should be counting your blessings instead of complaining!!

I just came back to the RCC after a 14 year absence. I had spent the last 7 in a Baptist church and to be honest with you I miss all the pre-service “fellowship”. The church I returned to is the one that I left 14 years ago. While I would agree with you 100% that there should be no “kibbutzing” during mass, I disagree that there is an issue with your fellow parishioners talking in church before and after the service.

Heck! I wish some would talk to me…!!!

 

[Apryl]

Ok… I’m not sure if this is a laugh, or just a plain old gripe

But…

on Sunday I do Rosary before our second Mass.

I go to the ambo, turn on the microphone, and announce that the Rosary is about to start and which mysteries we will be doing.

I went to the Communion Rail (it’s in the front and it’s obvious that there are prayers being done… this is for any one who may come in late)

There was a family who had been sitting quietly in preparation for their baby’s baptism.

I heard the Mother of the child tell the others to be quiet, and after a while she left with the baby.

Then, one woman at one end of the pew started ‘whispering’ to the woman on the other end of the pew.I gave them the look (one for each of them, so I had to turn my head twice). When I finished the decade I was doing, I turned and putting my finger to my lips shushed them.

When I finished, the mother had returned and laughing, she said I was ‘mean’.

I laughed it off, but I realize I was also offended. First, I said I was doing the Rosary. Secondly, you had been silent until I started. Third, I was less than 5 feet from you, kneeling, so it was obvious that I was praying. Fourth, I heard the mother shush you all myself a few times before she left. Then, to top it all off, two grown women sit on opposite ends of the church pew and ‘whisper’, as if they couldn’t have moved closer and I wouldn’t have said a word!

Why can’t we have silence, or silent prayer, in a church?

 

[MarkThompson]

Ok… I’m not sure if this is a laugh, or just a plain old gripe

But…

on Sunday I do Rosary before our second Mass.

I go to the ambo, turn on the microphone, and announce that the Rosary is about to start and which mysteries we will be doing.

I went to the Communion Rail (it’s in the front and it’s obvious that there are prayers being done… this is for any one who may come in late)

There was a family who had been sitting quietly in preparation for their baby’s baptism.

I heard the Mother of the child tell the others to be quiet, and after a while she left with the baby.

Then, one woman at one end of the pew started ‘whispering’ to the woman on the other end of the pew.I gave them the look (one for each of them, so I had to turn my head twice). When I finished the decade I was doing, I turned and putting my finger to my lips shushed them.

When I finished, the mother had returned and laughing, she said I was ‘mean’.

I laughed it off, but I realize I was also offended. First, I said I was doing the Rosary. Secondly, you had been silent until I started. Third, I was less than 5 feet from you, kneeling, so it was obvious that I was praying. Fourth, I heard the mother shush you all myself a few times before she left. Then, to top it all off, two grown women sit on opposite ends of the church pew and ‘whisper’, as if they couldn’t have moved closer and I wouldn’t have said a word!

Why can’t we have silence, or silent prayer, in a church?

It is a violation of the dignity of the ambo to use it for purposes like announcing that you will be saying the Rosary. As the GIRM makes painfully clear:
309. … From the ambo only the readings, the responsorial Psalm, and the Easter Proclamation (Exsultet) are to be proclaimed; it may be used also for giving the homily and for announcing the intentions of the Prayer of the Faithful. The dignity of the ambo requires that only a minister of the word should go up to it.
Maybe these women were whispering to try to figure out why you thought you could use the ambo for your own purposes, and why you would make a big announcement to let all and sundry know that you’re going to be saying some silent prayers?

 

[Apryl]

It is a violation of the dignity of the ambo to use it for purposes like announcing that you will be saying the Rosary. As the GIRM makes painfully clear:

This announcement was not done during Mass. It was between the Masses.

There is a microphone at the ambo, which allows the speaker to be heard throughout the church.

As for the women speaking: it was most definitely not about whether or not I should have made an announcement or where the announcement was made.

Oh, and my prayers were not silent. It is a set time at our church for the Rosary to be said. The announcement is to invite others to join in, which often happens.

Honestly, I have a GIRM, but I really don’t know how to use it. I never heard from anyone at my church that it was inappropriate or in any way questionable to do so. Thank you for the heads up. I won’t do it again, now that I’ve been shirt tugged.

 

[MarkThompson]

This announcement was not done during Mass. It was between the Masses.

There is a microphone at the ambo, which allows the speaker to be heard throughout the church.

As for the women speaking: it was most definitely not about whether or not I should have made an announcement or where the announcement was made.

Oh, and my prayers were not silent. It is a set time at our church for the Rosary to be said. The announcement is to invite others to join in, which often happens.

Honestly, I have a GIRM, but I really don’t know how to use it. I never heard from anyone at my church that it was inappropriate or in any way questionable to do so. Thank you for the heads up. I won’t do it again, now that I’ve been shirt tugged.

Yeah, sorry, looking over my post I think I came off as tugging your shirt harder than I meant to.

That said, as I understand it that instruction about the ambo is not limited in scope to Mass, so it would also apply to other functions. And you did say, “Why can’t we have silence, or silent prayer, in a church?”, so I assumed you were just saying the Rosary silently and I couldn’t understand why this would require a big announcement.

Also, I’m imagining what a post would look like written by one of the people you criticize:

Self-Important Parishioners
Have any of you guys had experiences like this? I was sitting in church because I’d gotten there early, when all of a sudden some random woman gets up like she owns the church, goes to the ambo of all places, turns on the mike even though there’s hardly anyone in the church, and announces that she’s going to be saying the Rosary. I didn’t see this announced in the bulletin!

So anyway, she’s up there praying by herself. I had something to say to my friend who I was there with, so I leaned over and whispered it. The woman then stops, right in the middle of her Rosary, to shush me like I was a third grader. Are there random people at your parish with this kind of nerve? I repeat, this was well before Mass, and I was whispering. Is this woman allowed to basically commandeer the entire church and demand that everyone observe strict silence while she prays?

–Signed, “Chatty” Parishioner.

Is that how this would look from the other side?

 

[frenchbeatle]

Chatty parishoners were particularly annoying Holy Thursday night, after the Blessed Sacrament had been carried to the Altar of Repose for the night. Right outside the room is the gathering space. The doors were closed, but the noise from all of those people talking made it completely impossible for me to pray. I had planned on staying for an hour or so, but only ended up staying for 10 minutes.

 

[Apryl]

Yeah, sorry, looking over my post I think I came off as tugging your shirt harder than I meant to.

No harm; no foul. You tugged. It needed to be tugged. I was not offended. (much)

And you did say, “Why can’t we have silence, or silent prayer, in a church?”, so I assumed you were just saying the Rosary silently and I couldn’t understand why this would require a big announcement.

I can see how my post was unclear.

1)Why can’t we have silence in church?

I am often annoyed when it’s as if silence is run off. I feel noise polluted often. There is no time when I can just be. Silence.

1. Why can’t we have silent prayer in church?

I meant that while those who are praying (or singing) are praying (or singing), why do others seem to have a need to talk over it. It’s like going to a movie and have some one discussing recipes for apple pie during the climactic scene when they explain why there was the event that brought us all to the movies.

1. For clarification:

When the Rosary is done (at my church), it is not intended to be done for the ENTIRE church. That is, if you don’t want to join in for the Rosary, you just need to move a few feet away, and you are ‘out of bounds’. If you choose to pray, silently, your own prayers, you don’t need to have that quiet interrupted by the sounds of a chorus of people who are praying the Rosary.

The reason why I ever did (and I will not continue, because I now know better) go to the ambo and announce the Rosary was that I had someone say they didn’t know what we were doing. It annoyed me. This was in reaction.

If I knew a better way to alert the masses that the TALK that would begin in the last 15 or 20 minutes before Mass time, or sometimes longer, should be curbed, I would welcome such direction.

I’ve been doing the Rosary at this time for more than 3 years now, I think. But for some reason, there are those who don’t have any respect for what is going on. Rather than argue and fight I was trying to prevent additional problems.

Is that how this would look from the other side?

Yikes! How accurate.

I see your point.

… but it is in the bulletin - still. I see your point (and I did before,but man, did you put a neon light under it or what??? )

 

[MarkThompson]

Hey Apryl, you sound like a good sport; I’m glad you can see the other side of it.

I have no idea what your church is like, of course, but maybe something like this would make sense: just walk to the front of the church (maybe stand in front of the ambo?), raise your voice and say, “Hi everybody! As was announced in the bulletin, we’re going to be saying the Rosary before Mass. Please come join us!” Then go to a side chapel, crypt chapel, or any other place that doesn’t involve taking over the whole church. (This assumes that other people regularly are saying the Rosary with you.)

I totally agree with you that silence before Mass is a good thing, but there are different levels of silence. It’s natural for people to need to communicate with each other as they arrive at Mass, whether to greet people they haven’t seen in a week, or to say “Excuse me, is this your coat?”, or to say, “Oh cool, it looks like we have Father Jim this week!”, and so on. But it’s the level of silence I would expect in a public library, not in a monastery.

So, yes, when people see you praying, they should respect that and respect your obvious desire for silence. (I still haven’t figured out if you’re praying the Rosary silently or out loud, but either way.) At the same time, you should show respect for others by, to the extent possible, picking a place and manner for your Rosary that won’t impose strict silence as opposed to relatively muted silence.

 

[Mrs_Sally]

My church also has set rosary times, but only on weekdays. The folks saying the rosary simply start about 5 minutes after Mass ends. And they are saying it aloud, and the responses are aloud. The people saying the rosary are also not all sitting together nor do they move to be sitting together.

But, we also have an adoration chapel that does have strict silence. So anyone needing that time of individual prayer usually moves to the chapel after daily Mass.

 

[Apryl]

Hey Apryl, you sound like a good sport; I’m glad you can see the other side of it.

I’m glad I can, too. But for you, who has NEVER been there, to put it like you did…and I can say with honestly, ‘I bet that’s what someone else IS saying’, well…

You get it. I SURE DO!

I have no idea what your church is like, of course, but maybe something like this would make sense: just walk to the front of the church (maybe stand in front of the ambo?), raise your voice and say, “Hi everybody! As was announced in the bulletin, we’re going to be saying the Rosary before Mass. Please come join us!” Then go to a side chapel, crypt chapel, or any other place that doesn’t involve taking over the whole church. (This assumes that other people regularly are saying the Rosary with you.)

Well, the use of the Ambo has stopped… but I don’t know that would work. I am not sure. I’m hesitant.

Basically, what you are saying is what was being said from the ambo… but I get the sneaking impression that the negative side of it would still be there, ambo or not; microphone or not.

As for moving to the side chapel or crypt… the problem with that is, you get so many who say (and I don’t believe them, but they say it), ‘I didn’t know any one was praying’. This has come from some who have said the Rosary with me.

I have considered not doing the Rosary. Too much resistance. Too many issues. Too much stuff… but as soon as I say, ‘I’m not doing the Rosary at church any more, it’s not appreciated’, we get people who show up. Sometimes, its the older woman who hobbles into church on her cane, who told me to say the St. Michael prayer more slowly. Sometimes, it’s the child of an old parishioner who ‘needs’ prayer for their personal issues. (Glad to be there). Sometimes, its’ the family that shows up with three generations, including the uncle who barely speaks English.

If this was for me, I would have stopped LONG ago. I have Rosary CDs for my car, I have a program for the Rosary and Divine Mercy Chaplet on my computer. I could be off knitting. But when I don’t do it, I run the risk of some one who needed it not getting it. Besides, it is in the church bulletin. Sometimes, it is just me. But I pray for the church. Sometimes, its as many as a dozen people of all ages and sizes and genders.

As for me praying at the Communion rail, I make it my BUSINESS to not pray so loudly that it disturbs others. I do listen to the sounds around me. Usually, no one is sitting around the area where I have plopped myself. If they are, I work to pray more quietly so that the people who are praying together can hear.

I have been asked to do the Rosary from the microphone (at the ambo) so that every one can hear it. I have refused (other than the one Sunday in October when it was announced in advance) to do this because I do NOT want to make it where people have to join in. I think it’s inappropriate. I don’t always want to pray and I wouldn’t want any one to try to make me pray with them.

No, I won’t take over the church. I try not to even take over where I am. Just want a place of our own to pray from.

I totally agree with you that silence before Mass is a good thing, but there are different levels of silence. It’s natural for people to need to communicate with each other as they arrive at Mass, whether to greet people they haven’t seen in a week, or to say “Excuse me, is this your coat?”, or to say, “Oh cool, it looks like we have Father Jim this week!”, and so on. But it’s the level of silence I would expect in a public library, not in a monastery.

Agreed. There is the type of silence one would expect when just being and doing, and there is the volume that is appropriate for a sports arena. Not kewl, imo.

Again, I didn’t blink when the baby was crying and the mother was talking to those around her about the baby and asking them to quiet down. I just had issues when the women, sitting about 8 feet apart, were trying to ‘whisper’ to each other.

Maybe you had to be there.

So, yes, when people see you praying, they should respect that and respect your obvious desire for silence. (I still haven’t figured out if you’re praying the Rosary silently or out loud, but either way.) At the same time, you should show respect for others by, to the extent possible, picking a place and manner for your Rosary that won’t impose strict silence as opposed to relatively muted silence.

I’m praying the Rosary aloud in a section of the church where it would be appropriate and away from the people who usually get to Mass early.

Read the others in the thread. There are a lot of folx who would be HUGGED if they would go to ‘relatively muted silence’. These people are talking loudly and are being boisterous. It would amaze you if you came in during some of these moments.

I approached one man who was at the door at the side of teh church, who was yelling to one of our returning students who was sitting in front of the altar. (Imagine a 100’ difference)

The church was built in the 1920s and is cavernous.

He yelled the student’s name. I asked him, ‘do you realize where you are?’

His response: “Yeah! That’s how I got that good echo”

 

[Apryl]

My church also has set rosary times, but only on weekdays. The folks saying the rosary simply start about 5 minutes after Mass ends. And they are saying it aloud, and the responses are aloud. The people saying the rosary are also not all sitting together nor do they move to be sitting together.

But, we also have an adoration chapel that does have strict silence. So anyone needing that time of individual prayer usually moves to the chapel after daily Mass.

I’m hoping that one day, that can be our church.

 

[MarkThompson]

Basically, what you are saying is what was being said from the ambo… but I get the sneaking impression that the negative side of it would still be there, ambo or not; microphone or not.

No, it’s perfectly find to make announcements when there’s something to be announce … it’s just that the ambo itself should be reserved for proclaiming the word of God and the homily.

As for moving to the side chapel or crypt… the problem with that is, you get so many who say (and I don’t believe them, but they say it), ‘I didn’t know any one was praying’. This has come from some who have said the Rosary with me.

Well, that’s why you would make the announcement. Then the only people who would “miss out” would be the ones who got there after you had started, and who hadn’t seen the announcement in the bulletin. After three years of you doing it at the same time before Mass, I would hope not too many people would be caught totally by surprise, and for those who are, just tell them, “Oh, sorry you didn’t see it in the bulletin. Make sure you come next week!”

Or else, it sounds like maybe what happens is that it’s usually just you, but sometimes other people join in?

I have been asked to do the Rosary from the microphone (at the ambo) so that every one can hear it. I have refused (other than the one Sunday in October when it was announced in advance) to do this because I do NOT want to make it where people have to join in. I think it’s inappropriate. I don’t always want to pray and I wouldn’t want any one to try to make me pray with them.

Maybe we’re talking about different things? Most churches, especially older churches like yours, will have an ambo, i.e. a pulpit, which is usually raised, decorated with carvings and so on, but they’ll also have a lectern in a simpler style. You can say anything you like from the lectern, which should also have a mike because it’ll be used for the end-of-mass announcements and so on. You just wouldn’t say the Rosary from the pulpit.

No, I won’t take over the church. I try not to even take over where I am. Just want a place of our own to pray from.

I’m just suggesting that you might not want to select the center of the church 20 minutes before Mass starts as that “place of your own.” Then you’ll always be competing with background noise. Two people sitting eight feet apart and whispering something to each other isn’t the best behavior in the world, but I don’t think it’s so out of line that it deserves a finger-to-the-lips shushing. Obviously, yelling from one end of the church to the other

But, especially in a cavernous 1920s church, I’d hope there would be a chapel where you could pray the Rosary out loud (at least, in a low voice) antiphonally if there’s someone to make the responses. To each her own, but for me I find that type of communal prayer more fulfilling than just having five people lined up all saying it silently to themselves.

I also wonder if it’s worth trying to start a Rosary Society. It might be possible to get a group of people who make a commitment to praying the Rosary together each week, rather than just hoping that on any given week people will want to join you.

Anyway, God bless you for your devotion!