Checking people out -- different scenario

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This is kind of embarassing… but here goes. Sometimes I get paranoid with my feelings of attraction (maybe) to guys… and I sort of check them out to see what kind of response it stimulates… I had to stop watching a baseball game because I was so embarassed about the temptation to do this. It only exacerbates the paranoia. It’s not like I’m lusting really, thinking impure thoughts, but still kinda looking in a sexual manner I guess? I dunno if it was a grave sin or not… I just know that if I looked at a woman like that I would feel guilty because a. it would arouse me and b. I would think it’s lusting. I just get paranoid sometimes (if you can’t tell.) I don’t really know how to explain it… looking at parts of guys to gauge the reaction because I freak myself out… does this make any sense? Is this a big sin, or should I try and avoid it the same way I avoid checking out women.
 
Our sexuality is very fluid and while we tend to adhere to a certain sexual orientation everyone may at some time find something sexual elsewhere. We should control these thoughts but thoughts come and go and shouldn’t necessarily be taken as abnormal. So I wouldn’t freak out about this unless you find yourself entertaining these thoughts or seeking this type of behavior. But overall human sexuality is not cut and dry and this does not mean that you are in grave sin. You’re just human and keep those thoughts guarded and you should be o.k.

God Bless…teachccd:)
 
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