Child missed mass due to parent/ circumstances. Does anyone need to go to confession?

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Jessie

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My husband took my daughter (11) out for the day yesterday. I attended Mass in the morning, and planned to go with her in the evening. They should have been back about 3 or 4 pm. Traffic was bad, didn’t get back till about 7.15. Too late for Mass. She didn’t have any control over the situation, I had made plans which could not happen due to traffic. Does either she or I need to confess this? Can we both still go to Communion? This will be a recurring problem to about Easter BTW. Thanks for advice.
 
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I would still attend confession and father will offer guidance.

God bless you
 
Cham65 said:
I would still attend confession and father will offer guidance.

God bless you
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I don’t see what guidance a priest could give, beyond plan better, and if possible, go to a Saturday evening Mass…

I certainly don’t see why the OP needs to go to confession. What sin has she committed?

She sent the child off for the day in good faith, expecting them to be back in time for Mass. Heavens, she was even prepared to go to Mass twice. So how has she sinned?
 
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I had planned to go Saturday evening, but we also got stuck in traffic and were late back, so I found a Sunday evening Mass. They left early, so before wasn’t possible.

My husband is not Catholic and is very anti-church, and taking her outside of our usual Mass causes considerable tension. He will take her out (skiing) many times over the winter. I don’t ski so I don’t go. Therefore this will not be the last time, although, like I said, they are usually back by 3 or 4, and we are not usually out on the Saturday.
 
He knows she has to go. I didn’t discuss the times because that also causes problems. I just checked what time they would be back and planned our attendance accordingly. He had planned to be back and the traffic was out of his control.
 
About 8 am. Which would mean Mass at 6 to be back in time. There isn’t one. It needs to be Saturday or Sunday evening.
 
You did everything within your means. It is not your fault that extraordinary, unexpected circumstances arose. Be at peace.
 
Thanks for the advice. I will try harder. Wednesday will be a problem 😔 may I ask that you pray that we make it, and without too much family tension.
 
Can you and your daughter attend an early morning Sunday Mass before she leaves with her daddy to ski?

I love our parish’s early Sunday Mass, which starts at 6:30 a.m. It’s out by 7 because there is no music–all the responses are recited. A very large number of families with babies and young children attend because it’s so short, and many kids are up early anyway!

I often attend this Mass when I am playing piano/organ at other parishes or churches all day Sunday.
 
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Have you talked to your daughter? At 11 she can’t obviously control the travel stuff, but is she concerned about the danger of consistently missing mass for 4 months?

Leaving aside sin, there is a danger of becoming insensitive to the obligation to attend. While your husband may not care and might dismiss your concerns, he might be more sensitive if your daughter is the one telling him mass is more important than skiing. On the other hand if she doesn’t see an issue missing mass for recreation then you might have a different problem in helping her with prioritization. This will be very difficult if your husband is dismissive and has no respect for your beliefs and passes that attitude to your child.
 
An early morning mass is not possible. I have checked. She won’t miss 4 months of Masses. I is accept that. The tragic was exceptionally bad, and we are not normally out all day Saturday, so we should be able to get to the Saturday evening Mass, or the Sunday evening. Like I said, traffic not normally so bad.
 
In short, you foresee times when traffic will preclude your daughter’s attending Mass, but you can’t tell when that will happen so you can’t work around it?

Ask your priest. In my opinion, this would not be a problem but who am I?
 
Folks, use common sense. There is no need to confess circumstances beyond our control, nor ask for a dispensation after the fact. Nor even ask for a dispensation before. Nor for travel when the plane or train timetable prevents going to Mass. A dispensation is for when you know you cannot make it to Mass ahead of time. An example would be to participate in an all-day charity event, or attending a family baptism at a non-Catholic church, or something along those lines.

God is not a tyrant. He expects us to do our best, not the impossible.
 
It’s not required, even for a vacation. Nor are you required to vacation in a place where Mass is available.
 
OraLabora said:
Folks, use common sense. There is no need to confess circumstances beyond our control, nor ask for a dispensation after the fact. Nor even ask for a dispensation before. Nor for travel when the plane or train timetable prevents going to Mass. A dispensation is for when you know you cannot make it to Mass ahead of time. An example would be to participate in an all-day charity event, or attending a family baptism at a non-Catholic church, or something along those lines.

God is not a tyrant. He expects us to do our best, not the impossible.
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And in addition, the child is a minor under the control of parents.
 
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