Children of adultery

[kaygee]

In talking to a friend – a devout Protestant – about Catholicism, this question arose. She married a divorced Protestant, they’ve been married for years and have several children. In approaching the Catholic Church, she understands that she is living in adultery until such time as it is shown that her husband’s previous marriage was not a marriage.

She’s OK with that, but she’s not sorry about the adultery because it resulted in beautiful children – eternal souls – that would not have come about except by her union with this divorced man. How does she handle the necessary contrition when she rejoices in the children that resulted?

This is what kept her from being received into the Church

 

[Gene_Church]

The fact that God brings good even from bad things do not make the bad things good. One can regret having offended God, yet still be pleased to witness blessings even in the dispair of sin.

 

[Hellisreal]

She can be sorry for the adultery and OUGHT to be, and still rejoice in the gift God gave them in spite of their evil actions.

Until she accepts it was evil, and repents she is not going to go far.

Only one direction and its not a good one.

 

[Flopfoot]

The ends do not justify the means. This is an important Catholic teaching for us to accept.

If I drive at 100 in a 55 zone, and no-one gets hurt or inconvenienced by this, it doesn’t make it okay.

If I bludgeon a man senseless for no reason at all, and it later turns out that he had a murder plan and was going home to murder his wife, this does not make what I did okay. Even though I in a way saved a life, I still must admit that I did the wrong thing and repent about what I did.
Repenting my action doesn’t mean I have to wish she was dead - even though, had I not committed that sin, she would likely be dead. I can be pleased about the end result while still admitting that the action was wrong.

 

[Cari]

The fact that God brings good even from bad things do not make the bad things good. One can regret having offended God, yet still be pleased to witness blessings even in the dispair of sin.

This is the best explination I’ve ever heard for this. I’m going to stick it in my hat and use it later.

Thanks!

 

[Bruised_Reed]

The fact that God brings good even from bad things do not make the bad things good. One can regret having offended God, yet still be pleased to witness blessings even in the dispair of sin.

And I would add that being sorry for sin, in this case adultery, does not mean that she is sorry she had those specific children. I have heard others struggle with this and they are afraid if they repent of the sin they are turning away from the very child(ren) from that relationship. I’ve also, heard some (okay maybe one) suggest that one should be sorry for the children as well. I don’t think so.

 

[deb1]

In talking to a friend – a devout Protestant – about Catholicism, this question arose. She married a divorced Protestant, they’ve been married for years and have several children. In approaching the Catholic Church, she understands that she is living in adultery until such time as it is shown that her husband’s previous marriage was not a marriage.

She’s OK with that, but she’s not sorry about the adultery because it resulted in beautiful children – eternal souls – that would not have come about except by her union with this divorced man. How does she handle the necessary contrition when she rejoices in the children that resulted?

This is what kept her from being received into the Church

It sounds like your friend is rationalizing something that she knows is wrong to alleviate the guilt that she might feel. Good things can sometimes come from bad actions. Israel would probably not exist if it wasn’t for the Holocaust, for example. That doesn’t make genocide a good thing.

Did she understand at the time of her marriage that she was commiting adultery? Many modern Protestants tend to ignore the implications of divorce and remarriage. They are taught that a government issued divorce is valid in the eyes of God. So she might not have been aware that she was sinning. If so, I would think that she would be less cupable for her actions then an avearage Catholic.