Your ideas of punishment are unfortunate. Sinning for example, always has consequences.
I will just use two quick examples which represent perhaps the most famous in the Gospel.
The prodigal son. This is an example of being punished with more love. The suffering is shame, but it does not emminate from the father. The more interesting part of the parable is the good son. It is his reaction that represents the true Christ message.
The other, the Adulteress, is punished via her sin, and forgiven. But the punishment is not retributive.
Of course there was actually a reason for Christ. One reason, is to eliminate the transactional view of punishment from the OT. STILL, IF you wish, I can cite Ezekial and Isaiah passages of God responding with punishment of enhanced love. Just ask.
So yes their is punishment. Julian of Norwich spoke of sin as death. But she also spoke of it having qualities necessary to teach right thinking.
If punishment happened as some form of grist for the mill, or pound of flesh, there would be no prodigal son or Adulteress passages prominent in the Gospel. You cannot read those passages and imagine God vindicating his Divine Justice being Paramount. Not receiving repentance either. Repentance is for our good. God has no imperfect ego to be fed. A finite mortal need. A PROJECTION OF OUR OWN IMPERFECTION ON GOD.
And yes, he answered the prayer of the one thief, but we know nothing about the final outcome with the other.
The Conference of Catholic Bishops do not read the punishment for generations language of Exudus 34 as you do. They point out the " many " passages where future generations are not punished for the sins of the parents, although circumstances might be that a parents sins create punishing circumstances for kids.
At this point I see a pattern. You have culled out the darkest passages in scripture as your Christian Bible.
Fransciscans do not let their entry level people read scripture initially. They first educate them in philosophy and other coursework to permit them to discern.
They also educate them to read the Bible from the vantage of the Cross. Their teaching is based upon the dark message the Bible can communicate if you approach it from a dark mindset. I guess hundreds of years of Wisdom accounts for experience.