Civil Marriage

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Some catholic couple get married civilly, but later they decide to get married sacramentally.

My opinion : their love to one another and gods blessings is the true sacrament. Yes, theoretically a couple do not have god’s blessings if they have not sacramentally married. But if their faithful love is true : If one of the couple refuse to get married sacramentally, it is still beneficial to get married civilly, then sacramentally later, rather than cohabitation without any marriage at all. Their decision to get married sacramentally later is also God’s grace.

That was my opinion before knowing the last fact that they are RCIA candidates, and not because one of them refuse to get married in the church.
Opinion does not truth make.

What you are missing is the fact that if Christians are simply married civilly they are not yet married. Thus, to promote the position that you are advocating is to promote both cohabitation and fornication, in a word concubinage.

It is clear that many people, Catholics included, share your opinion. However, it is an erroneous opinion and should be changed accordingly.
 
What you are missing is the fact that if Christians are simply married civilly they are not yet married.
Do you mean simply Christians, or Catholic Christians? If it’s the former, that’s not what our pastor and the canon lawyer told us. They both said that only full Catholics are bound by canon law, and thus the canonical impediments against marriage only apply to them. Seeing as how we won’t be full Catholics at the time of our marriage, it will be valid, sacramental and licit.

We didn’t include the bit about RCIA because we felt it was irrelevant. The main question of this thread was: What’s the difference between marrying civilly (purely civilly, like in a courthouse) and taking communion in a Protestant church? Whether the marriage was valid or not wasn’t really the question… its liceity was.
 
Do you mean simply Christians, or Catholic Christians? If it’s the former, that’s not what our pastor and the canon lawyer told us. They both said that only full Catholics are bound by canon law, and thus the canonical impediments against marriage only apply to them. Seeing as how we won’t be full Catholics at the time of our marriage, it will be valid, sacramental and licit.

We didn’t include the bit about RCIA because we felt it was irrelevant. The main question of this thread was: What’s the difference between marrying civilly (purely civilly, like in a courthouse) and taking communion in a Protestant church? Whether the marriage was valid or not wasn’t really the question… its liceity was.
Wow what a pile of snakes, first lets address the primary confusion, if given a dispensation it is from canonical form for a catholic to obtain marriage without the specific requirement of form. So the civil marriage is misunderstood. Now to expand that to get to your question; If two non Catholics marry the Catholic Church recognizes this one time if baptized it is sacramental marriage, if not baptized it is recognized as a Natural Marriage. If they convert to Christians the marriage becomes sacramental (one marriage only). Now, once Catholic always catholic by canonical law. So to side track when a catholic marries outside the church without a dispensation the marriage is not recognized by the Catholic Church, thus convalidations, radical Senations, or Sacramental Marriages are needed to return to communion.

To contrast that to communion in a Protestant Church which is a big stretch different, in that case the Catholic has simply sinned by contributing/ or following improper authority, and thus a simple confession is needed to return to communion. To help you understand the latter person can return to full communion with the church in about 30 minutes, the former catholic can spend months or years to return to full communion with the catholic church.

Hope that helps
 
Do you mean simply Christians, or Catholic Christians? If it’s the former, that’s not what our pastor and the canon lawyer told us. They both said that only full Catholics are bound by canon law, and thus the canonical impediments against marriage only apply to them. Seeing as how we won’t be full Catholics at the time of our marriage, it will be valid, sacramental and licit.
This is correct. If neither of you is Catholic, then canon law does not apply to you regarding the form of marriage.

If you are both baptized and contract marriage civilly, it is valid and a sacrament. If one or both of you is unbaptized, the marriage is valid and a natural marriage. Upon baptism of both parties, the marriage becomes a sacrament.
We didn’t include the bit about RCIA because we felt it was irrelevant.
It is not irrelevant. You listed yourself as Catholic in your profile, and asked a question about getting married civilly. Therefore, the intial responses to you incorrectly focused on your need to marry in the Catholic form. But, you are NOT Catholic and therefore do not have to marry in the Catholic form. It was a huge detail to leave out of your initial post as it led to inaccurate answers to your question.
The main question of this thread was: What’s the difference between marrying civilly (purely civilly, like in a courthouse) and taking communion in a Protestant church? Whether the marriage was valid or not wasn’t really the question… its liceity was.
I don’t understand what protestant communion has to do with marriage?

Your entire original post does not make any sense in light of the fact you are not a Catholic. Perhaps you can clarify your question.
 
Do you mean simply Christians, or Catholic Christians? If it’s the former, that’s not what our pastor and the canon lawyer told us. They both said that only full Catholics are bound by canon law, and thus the canonical impediments against marriage only apply to them. Seeing as how we won’t be full Catholics at the time of our marriage, it will be valid, sacramental and licit.
This is correct. If neither of you is Catholic, then canon law does not apply to you regarding the form of marriage.

If you are both baptized and contract marriage civilly, it is valid and a sacrament. If one or both of you is unbaptized, the marriage is valid and a natural marriage. Upon baptism of both parties, the marriage becomes a sacrament.
Yes, I mean simply Christians. However, the issue is more nuanced than 1ke or I have expressed. If you are a Christian who is not Catholic and belong to a ‘tradition’ (for lack of a better term) that requires that its members be married in a church ceremony then if they are married by the JP the Church will not recognize it as a Sacramental Marriage. Usually, the Church holds other Christians to their own standards. Of course, if one belongs to a ‘tradition’ that does not have such a requirement then the civil ceremony will generally suffice.
 
Glad to hear from you.

I will not inquire about the consequences in the event that they are private matters. However, considering what you have said reframes the concern of the thread.

The dispensation that you two seem to be thinking about is a dispensation from canonical form. Yes, this can be granted but only for a just reason. The usual reason is a case with a mixed marriage which the couple is desirous of being married in the non-Catholic’s “church” and this is judged to be a good for the sake of the couple. Or, retroactively for those who are seeking to regularize their marriage, i.e., radical sanation.

If I understand your situation properly it doesn’t seem like this is what we are talking about. What you are looking for is engaging in a civil marriage and then after the civil ceremony working through the ecclesial process to engage in a Sacramental Marriage. This is a very difficult and particular case. You will need to speak to the Pastor of the parish and definitely seek the advice of the Judicial Vicar for the diocese. While there are folks who are knowledgable jurists on this forum I don’t think this is the proper place to deal with the complexities of your situation. You need to have a sit-down conversation with the competent authorities in this diocese where you are living and where she is visiting (because her diocese of residence might also need to be notified of any judgments made on this issue).

But 1ke is right, there is not specific power of dispensation granted for the situation you seem to be requesting. The desecration of the Diocesan Bishop will have to be relied upon.
The desecration of a Bishop will have to be relied upon?

That sounds very interesting. How does one go about this process?
 
Opinion does not truth make.

What you are missing is the fact that if Christians are simply married civilly they are not yet married. Thus, to promote the position that you are advocating is to promote both cohabitation and fornication, in a word concubinage.

It is clear that many people, Catholics included, share your opinion. However, it is an erroneous opinion and should be changed accordingly.
You are right. My answer was not the ideal answer I should have given, because I was “strategizing” for the OP, thinking that there were no reason they could not marry in the church unless because one of them being indecisive because of the rush, situation etc. Therefore in that post I began with “In my opinion, if both of you are sincere about the marriage…”. So assuming that both the OP and fiance were sincere with their plan to get married, I gave my advice to get married civilly first, assuming it was only a matter of timing, situation, etc. I did believed God will bless their faithfulness to one another, thus sacramental marriage will surely come in place indeed. This was my assumption in giving such advice.

Other assumption that I used in my advice was : Couple who get married civilly get clear status in the eye of the law. Eventhough they are not married sacramentally, they usually will have to take their life together seriously because of the law. It will give clear status to the children of such marriage as well. Thus when the time that they are ready for the sacramental marriage, everything usually will just fall in place.

So Mosher is right that my advice is not the best catholic practice, rather it was compromising with the given situation the OP explained as I understood it. I apologize for those who misunderstood such as general ideal catholic teaching, I did not say so. I did not mean so.
 
I was married to my husband civilly for a long time before we got our marriage convalidated.
We did the convalidation simply to follow the “rules.”

There is no question that it changed the nature of our relationship in profound ways, although neither of us had expected it.

The sacrament does something over and above the couple’s love for one another. Things are totally different now.

I wouldn’t have thought so either before actually having the experience.
Yes. I do believe that God’s blessing is transcribed in the sacrament, and that such can make a big difference.

Thankyou for your testimony, it strengthens me in my faith.
 
If you are a Christian who is not Catholic and belong to a ‘tradition’ (for lack of a better term) that requires that its members be married in a church ceremony then if they are married by the JP the Church will not recognize it as a Sacramental Marriage.
The Orthodox Churches have a requirement of form/canonical code, and a sacramental understanding of marriage. The Catholic Church acknowledges Orthodox marriages as valid or invalid depending upon whether or not the Orthodox person married according to Orthodox requirements.

To my knowledge, there is **no **ecclesial community that has such a concept or requirement for the witnessing of marriages.
 
The Orthodox Churches have a requirement of form/canonical code, and a sacramental understanding of marriage. The Catholic Church acknowledges Orthodox marriages as valid or invalid depending upon whether or not the Orthodox person married according to Orthodox requirements.

To my knowledge, there is **no **ecclesial community that has such a concept or requirement for the witnessing of marriages.
You are most likely correct in fact. I was simply establishing the principle for the sake of precision.
 
The desecration of a Bishop will have to be relied upon?

That sounds very interesting. How does one go about this process?
This is purely in the realm of theory now because we found that this issue is not the issue of the OP(s). But, simply put, the code recognizes that it cannot account for all the exigencies of human life. Therefore a lot of latitude is given to the Diocesan Bishop and even more so to the Holy See. I’m not saying that the Code gets tossed but rather that application of the law is not always straightforward. There is a principle of interpretation that states: Restrictions are to be interpreted as narrowly as possible and permissions are to be interpreted as broadly as possible.

The process begins with talking to ones Pastor. Dialogue with our ecclesiastical superiors is essential to fully living out a robust Catholic life.
 
This is purely in the realm of theory now because we found that this issue is not the issue of the OP(s). But, simply put, the code recognizes that it cannot account for all the exigencies of human life. Therefore a lot of latitude is given to the Diocesan Bishop and even more so to the Holy See. I’m not saying that the Code gets tossed but rather that application of the law is not always straightforward. There is a principle of interpretation that states: Restrictions are to be interpreted as narrowly as possible and permissions are to be interpreted as broadly as possible.

The process begins with talking to ones Pastor. Dialogue with our ecclesiastical superiors is essential to fully living out a robust Catholic life.
Mosher, let me publically apologize for misunderstanding you over this. I was simply confused based on a very common error I fall into myself many times more than I would like to think about.

Your explaination makes perfect sense to me now- but I must admit at the time it did not make any sense at all, and I really did believe it was possible to allow harming a bishop. Forgive me for not seeing this the first time, or not PMing you for clarity before replying. You seem very patient and willing to discuss matters and I want to make sure you know I am also.
 
Mosher, let me publically apologize for misunderstanding you over this. I was simply confused based on a very common error I fall into myself many times more than I would like to think about.

Your explaination makes perfect sense to me now- but I must admit at the time it did not make any sense at all, and I really did believe it was possible to allow harming a bishop. Forgive me for not seeing this the first time, or not PMing you for clarity before replying. You seem very patient and willing to discuss matters and I want to make sure you know I am also.
Thank you. It was good that you caught that error. It’s actually quite funny.
 
Thanks for your replies, everyone… and I’m sorry for taking so long to respond – I’ve been very busy lately.

I didn’t include that I was in RCIA because I didn’t think it was relevant. I’m not Catholic now, but I will be soon. 🙂 Sure, that fact means that our original plans have changed (we will be getting married outside of the Church, but *not *in a civil ceremony with a Catholic wedding later on). But that doesn’t change my question. I’M NOT ASKING WHETHER OR NOT IT WOULD BE A VALID MARRIAGE!!! :banghead:

I don’t feel right about getting married outside of the Church (but know that the long wait before getting married in the Church would be a problem – our pastor even said it would probably be best not to do that considering our situation). Anyways, my fiancé assured me that I wouldn’t be doing anything sinful. Our pastor assured us that we wouldn’t be doing anything sinful. A canon lawyer even assured us that we wouldn’t be doing anything sinful. But I don’t feel right about it. It would be sinful for me to take communion at a Protestant Church, correct? But it wouldn’t be sinful to get married outside of the church, right? I don’t understand the difference! They’re both sacraments.

I hope this post makes more sense – I apologise for not wording it very well in previous posts. You know how sometimes you have a question/thought that makes perfect sense in your head… but when you try and put it into words, it just doesn’t come out right? Well… I’m having one of those moments! 😛
 
It would be sinful for me to take communion at a Protestant Church, correct?
You are not currently a Catholic. Therefore you are not prohibited by canon law from receiving communion in a non-Catholic church. As a candidate you should voluntarily refrain because you no longer consider yourself in communion with these protestants and you recognize they do not have a valid Eucharist.
But it wouldn’t be sinful to get married outside of the church, right?
You are not a Catholic and neither is your fiance. Therefore, not only does Catholic form NOT apply to you, it CANNOT apply to you.
I don’t understand the difference! They’re both sacraments.
In the sacrament of marriage the **couple **is the minister of the sacrament. They confer it upon each other by the exchange of consent. The Catholic priest, deacon, or appointed lay person is the Church’s *witness *to the marriage when the marriage involves a Catholic. The priest does not confer the sacrament (Latin Rite Church). Therefore, non-Catholics marry validly and sacramentally when they exchange their vows.

The sacrament of the Eucharist is different. The **priest **is the minister of the sacrament. Therefore, protestants do not have a valid Eucharist and you should refrain from participating in their communion service.
 
In the sacrament of marriage the **couple **is the minister of the sacrament. They confer it upon each other by the exchange of consent. The Catholic priest, deacon, or appointed lay person is the Church’s *witness *to the marriage when the marriage involves a Catholic. The priest does not confer the sacrament (Latin Rite Church). Therefore, non-Catholics marry validly and sacramentally when they exchange their vows.

The sacrament of the Eucharist is different. The **priest **is the minister of the sacrament. Therefore, protestants do not have a valid Eucharist and you should refrain from participating in their communion service.
I would like to clarify this a little bit. It is becoming the common opinion that the couple is the minister of the sacrament of matrimony. However, this is not the case. There is no magisterial document that has indicated this as being the case. In fact, the thought that the Western Church holds this position started when we are accused by the Orthodox as holding this position. Rather, what is more accurate is that the Church has not made any formal pronouncement on who is the Ordinary Minister of the Sacrament of Matrimony.

There is an excellent article on this issue by Fr. Benoit Dominique de la Soujeole in the Revue Thomiste back in 2001 where he examines this specific issue. It is more accurate to say that we don’t know how it works but the best we can say is that the Church supplies the necessary missing element through the doctrine of economy or as we call it in the West dispensatio. I know this doesn’t help the poster but we do really need to exorcise this doctrinal myth.

The problem is that Matrimony pre-exists the Christian or even the Hebrew dispensation so it is a really complicated Sacrament. The point at this moment ought to be trust in the Lord and trust in the advice that his ministers have provided. Trust is hard but it is necessary for love. Consider this a quick initiation into the reality that we haven’t figured out all the details about the faith that we know to be true. This is part of the mystery that is the faith. We try to give the best account of what we know to be the case until there is a formal clarification. With this issue I like to tell people that " we know it to be the case but we’re not exactly sure how it is the case."
 
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