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Havard
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I just take it for granted that posters are in agreement with Church teaching unless they start stating objections.
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thewanderer
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Annie39
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I would have to quote too much here it is the general attitude of acceptance. If the Catholic is trying to help her friend to convert and fight his temptations that is one thing, but to accept him as a person with just another life style change that is another.
I quote your post “became established in the 1960s as the term preferred by homosexual men to describe themselves.”
Exactly and we have capitulated.
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mommy_k
Guest
I would like to have my daughter to be around positive role models friends- that reflect the teachings of the Catholic church regarding these matters.- iron shaprens iron-
I would think all parents would want this.
I would keep my eye on any friend scenario that causes a temptation to sin, and I think any parent would do this too.
Ps : I also have sons around this age and the same goes for them too.
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VeritasLuxMea
Guest
Where?
I will repeat: there is no reason to expect that anyone referenced in the original post has committed sodomy. So, whose act of sodomy are we accepting of, exactly?
If it’s too much work for you to actually back up outrageous accusations like that, then:
- Do not bring it up in the first place.
- Don’t bother to continue talking about it on this thread.
Reference the original post again:
**He is not dating or living a gay lifestyle. **
What is your problem with this young man, exactly?
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Annie39
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The OP asked for opinions, I gave mine. I didn’t accuse anyone of committing sodomy but I said that there is a Laissez-faire attitude that permeates our culture. You asked where it is implied I said all through the thread. I stand by this.
A person who is struggling with temptation towards this sin is not a suitable constant companion for a young woman. That is my opinion. He needs help not placating. In years gone by the person would have kept this to himself. Now it is not only expected that we accept this lifestyle but approve of it. Why would this boy tell the girl about his temptation? Years ago the reason that someone would tell another person about this is that he/she wanted help, not acceptance but that is what is going on.
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thewanderer
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The “lifestyle” this other person is practicing is that of celibacy. If tat changes in the future then the question can be revisited (although even then, we are not called to shun sinners or only be friends with saints, if that were so none of us could ever have friends, what matters is to what effect a particular friendship will have on the particular friendship involved, and that depends on the characters of the particular people involved, it is not a question that can be answered generally).
As for the term gay, since it only means that someone is attracted to someone of the opposite sex I really don’t understand how this is capitulation. If I mean the exact same thing by homosexual, or SSA as I do by gay then why is the one problematic to use but not the others? If they all mean the same thing why does it matter which is used?
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thewanderer
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I guess I just don’t understand why someone that she may become attracted to is less of a temptation than someone who may become attracted to her but to whom she will never be tempted by.
Though I must say I think it is wonderful you would care about whether your daughters friends are a temptation for her, whether or not they are leading her into sin, that is a very important thing for any parent to consider. I just hope you would also take into account her particular character, how strong she is in her faith, how well, or poorly, she stands up to peer pressure etc. because all of that plays a huge part in whether a particular friendship will be problematic (as does how pushy the other person is, how much they are willing to respect her and your beliefs even if they personally disagree with them, etc). Its a difficult question with no easy generic answer as it all depends so much on the particulars of who are involved and how their relationship works.
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thewanderer
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Is he, in your opinion, a suitable companion for a young man? Or is it your opinion that such a man is doomed to live their life without friends or companionship because of the particular temptation they happen to struggle with?
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oldcatholicguy
Guest
A person struggling with temptation toward engaging in sexual sins isn’t a suitable constant companion for a young woman? Who exactly is she supposed to hang out with?
As for telling someone in order to gain acceptance, everyone wants acceptance. The key here is to accept the person, flaws and all, not their sinful behavior.
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Jon_S_1
Guest
So will half the people she encounters in her life and a number of friends and coworkers. Time to let her out of the bubble.
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Captain_America
Guest
Unpleasant to hear the harsh prosecutorial tone here.
In my book, it’s fine to have gay friends. For the OP, there’s a concern about the gay person having some kind of impact on the daughter.
Many gays I know have a laughing, irresponsible concern about moral matters. YMMV. They also tend to be liberal and care a lot less about “sensible” things. YMMV. I can appreciate parents being concerned about a child going this direction. To some extent, the gay viewpoint is pretty hedonist (cf. drug use/alcohol use; exploitation rate) and self-centered and self-serving.
But this is, as you see, a generalization. Statistics bear out this generalization.
In my book, it’s fine to have gay friends. For the OP, there’s a concern about the gay person having some kind of impact on the daughter.
Many gays I know have a laughing, irresponsible concern about moral matters. YMMV. They also tend to be liberal and care a lot less about “sensible” things. YMMV. I can appreciate parents being concerned about a child going this direction. To some extent, the gay viewpoint is pretty hedonist (cf. drug use/alcohol use; exploitation rate) and self-centered and self-serving.
But this is, as you see, a generalization. Statistics bear out this generalization.
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oldcatholicguy
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Agreed. As long as the OP is confident in her daughter’s moral character and understanding of the faith it shouldn’t be an issue.
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Auntie_A
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I understand and agree with you here–I am also very sorry for what you have gone through–but those people who have said that homosexuality is not a choice were not Catholic and in some cases not even Christian. They had no sense of chastity as a serious option, no examples set in their families (much to my dismay… I had the advantage of knowing the nuns, priests, uncles and the lovely maiden aunts who died in their 80’s as virgins, very joyful people, very fulfilled)
And I do think it a tragedy that children, teens, and young adults are given way too much license and misinformation on sexuality, presented as truth.
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Havard
Guest
This woman may be a young woman, but she is a woman, and not a child. She’s approximately the age St. Joan of Arc died and for all we know, she may be a living saint, too, and her faith and encouragement may inspire this young man to a great life.
Adults are called to evangelize, and this is an opportunity for her to do just that. She has 18 years of good nurturing, and her parents are involved and upright. If now isn’t the appropriate time for her to interact with a gay man, when is? When she’s finished college? When she’s 30? When should she be allowed to be a witness to people?
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Catolico65
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You are absolutely right, they have few good role models. That is where we are supposed to enter the picture and let them known the truth that they weren’t born that way and that something much better awaits them.
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EasterJoy
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Find me a young man who is not struggling with sexual temptation. This young man’s lifestyle does not appear any different than any other chaste young person. He is not presenting himself in public as homosexual, he is living no “lifestyle” different from theirs, and he is not seeking romantic encounters with other young men. He has done nothing wrong, except perhaps to disclose his struggle to someone who was not old enough to keep a confidence.
Why would he tell her? Maybe because she kept suggesting nice young friends who might make him a nice girlfriend. Maybe because he was afraid he would not be accepted by other Catholics if they knew he is not attracted to women. Since he is not “out of the closet”, we have to assume that he told his close friends this information in confidence. Since the young man is not acting out his temptations, the young woman really ought not have told her parents.
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EasterJoy
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How do* you *know that someone else is not born with a propensity to some sin or other? The Church doesn’t teach that.
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Catolico65
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Please post you source where the Church teaches that God created people biologically to sin.How do* you *know that someone else is not born with a propensity to some sin or other? The Church doesn’t teach that.
At any rate what I do know from science is that homosexual desire for the majority of people are temporary and it has proven to have no genetic source so it can’t be biological.
What I do know from the Bible is that God as the author of all biology did not design man to desire other men, but rather women and vice versa.
Also, the concept that people are born with biological defects, created by God, that causes them to sin neither is based on real science nor the Holy Bible. It is pure unsupported non scientific conjecture propagated by the gay lobby and relativists.
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MorEphrem
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I take it you don’t believe bipolar disorder or another psychological disorder that can orient one towards sinful behavior (violence, propensity to additive substances, etc.) are nonexistent?
But yes, I don’t know why you would impede your daughter’s friendships. I don’t understand how one is “gay” without the lifestyle. The idea of sexual orientation in itself is a 19th century Western psychological concept. I find all the distinctions between orientation, gender and sex all fictitious and scientifically unfounded.
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