Co-Ed Housing, in a Catholic setting?

  • Thread starter Thread starter Craisin
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
C

Craisin

Guest
This upcoming year, I am committed to do a year-long young adult Catholic volunteer service program. Within this program, there are both male and females involved -all well and fine! However, they provide us housing within this program, and in years past have put males and females together to live in the same townhouse. This year they are planning on doing the same.

Is co-ed housing morally inappropriate? While males and females certainly would NOT be sharing the same bedrooms, we would be sharing bathrooms and living space.

Is there church teaching which says males and females unrelated or unmarried should not be living in the same habitation? Or at least a strong recommendation by a Pope or saint? (I do have the option of requesting to live in a different house, since there will be two houses this year!)

Thank you!
 
I am sure people will have many things to say about this.
If you yourself may be tempted, you ought to stay away.
If some of the people start having sex, how will you like living there? Will you think it fine for example if they come out of their bedroom every morning and have breakfast with you?
What if people finding out you are living with people of the opposite sex think you yourself are having sexual involvement with one person of the opposite sex, or perhaps with all of them? Are you willing to have people think of you this way, perhaps even including some of your family members? Could this interfere with someone you may have otherwise married accepting you?
 
Noting their carelessness in this respect I would tend to question their overall commitment to Church teachings. As one may note with certain universities etc, not all organizations that use the name Catholic are truly Catholic.
 
Joe_Kelley said:
Noting their carelessness in this respect I would tend to question their overall commitment to Church teachings. As one may note with certain universities etc, not all organizations that use the name Catholic are truly Catholic.
Click to expand...
I agree. I don’t think it’s a good idea to house single males and females together. There’s too much temptation there. Even if you are morally strong and avoid sin, it would still be a needless distraction from your growth in faith and service, which I commend. 🙂

I would speak to someone about this, or maybe even look into other service opportunities.
 
I’ve heard the program tends to be affiliated with more progressive Catholic mindsets, while I tend to adhere to a more traditional mindset, at least in terms of adhering to the magisterium and tradition when it comes down to morals. However, I attended a secular university for the past four years, and although difficult at times, have really learned to grow in speaking about my faith to others with a different mindset - which I have been very blessed with and thankful for! Therefore, I am not too worried about serving with other Catholics who are more progressive in their approach - perhaps I can add my two cents at times and have some influence. My whole mentality with this program is, I don’t mind working with or even living with some progressive Catholics, because they are very active in their faith from what I can tell talking with a few of them and will probably spark good discussions. I DO mind, however, disrespect for my personal moral values or disrespect of myself. I don’t expect them to think less of me if I asked to live in a different house a part from the men, but I would like to know if it is inappropriate according to the Church. 🤷 That is, if it is considered inappropriate and immoral, perhaps it is an issue I should bring up to the program coordinator so a separation of men and women could actually benefit and protect the whole group, and not just myself. But still - I do not know of any proof to bring forth…any suggestions?
 
I had a female roommate for the longest time. I talked it over with a few priests, and none of them thought it was against church teachings (but all agreed that it would be detrimental to my dating life!)

I don’t think God would be mad that you and someone of the opposite sex are sharing the same toaster, toilet or garbage disposal.
 
You are going to be living away from home, in your own shared resident. If you decide to have sex with someone, it will make very little difference whether your house is co-ed or not.

It’s not hard to put in some house rules about things like not wandering around in a towel, and that is likely a good idea. But unless you are showering together, I don’t think it will be a problem any more than if you were in a single gender residence.

I lived in a women-only residence in university, there was also a co-ed one. There was no less hanky-panky in the single gender residence. On the other hand, the estrogen fumes could be overwhelming.
 
I attend a Catholic university where the dorms are co-ed. There are many reasons for this that aren’t just to “justify” it. Before I started college, I was sure that I would hate living in co-ed dorms, as I had no choice. However, I actually have come to appreciate it. (don’t worry, I am still as much of a catholic as before I started college)
 
Co-ed dorms can mean different things. In some cases, the sexes are separated by floors. But in other cases male and female students are on the same floors and have adjoining rooms. I presume that the first is the case in your own instance, which is quite different from living in the same apartment.
I recall some of the crazy things that happened when I was a graduate student at the University of Wisconsin some decades ago. There were no co-ed dorms anywhere back then but of course the students living in town could have any arrangement they wanted. I had three male roommates in the same apartment, and one of them said his female acquaintance had an emergency and needed a place, so I said they could stay in our apartment temporarily, and she slept on the sofa in the living room. But I didn’t like the situation, and after she stayed there several months, I had her kicked out. (Though after she left she came back sometimes to stay over night with that roommate to have sex with him.) One person thought all four of us were sharing her, since she was living with all of us. I don’t know what other people thought. I could tell some other stories, but these would be off the track.
rowermath said:
I attend a Catholic university where the dorms are co-ed. There are many reasons for this that aren’t just to “justify” it. Before I started college, I was sure that I would hate living in co-ed dorms, as I had no choice. However, I actually have come to appreciate it. (don’t worry, I am still as much of a catholic as before I started college)
Click to expand...
 
Coed dorms remind me of the College Honor System where it was noted that the professors had the honor and the students had a system. 😃
 
mdgspencer said:
Co-ed dorms can mean different things. In some cases, the sexes are separated by floors. But in other cases male and female students are on the same floors and have adjoining rooms. I presume that the first is the case in your own instance, which is quite different from living in the same apartment.
I recall some of the crazy things that happened when I was a graduate student at the University of Wisconsin some decades ago. There were no co-ed dorms anywhere back then but of course the students living in town could have any arrangement they wanted. I had three male roommates in the same apartment, and one of them said his female acquaintance had an emergency and needed a place, so I said they could stay in our apartment temporarily, and she slept on the sofa in the living room. But I didn’t like the situation, and after she stayed there several months, I had her kicked out. (Though after she left she came back sometimes to stay over night with that roommate to have sex with him.) One person thought all four of us were sharing her, since she was living with all of us. I don’t know what other people thought. I could tell some other stories, but these would be off the track.
Click to expand...
Actually, the floors are not by gender, there are men living down the hall from me, even in the room next door.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top