Cohabitation and Confirmation

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rianredd8810

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Hello everybody!!

Yesterday, a good friend of mine asked me to be her confirmation sponsor! I was very excited, and praised God for her wanting to return to the faith. However; her situation is tricky, and I need some help…

She is currently living with her boyfriend. Their relationship is one that is involves intimacy that should only be shared between married couples. When I asked her about her situation, she told me that her boyfriend provided much financial support, and that she could not afford to educate herself if it was not for his income. She is from the Washington DC area, and had no one here to fall on except her boyfriend.I told her that because of her living situation, much needed to be analyzed about it. She one day wants to marry her boyfriend (Who is a very non-practicing, anti-catholic protestant).

My question is, given her situation, can she be Confirmed in the present time? If she were to abstain from all sexual activity, could she then make a sincere confession and receive the sacrament?🤷

Thanks

-Ryan
 
She can be confirmed but she will not receive any of the sacramental graces until she resolves to remove herself from that grave situation and confess her sins…teachccd
 
Part of confession is to see and admit to sin that cuts our connection to God. We also profess to avoid the occasion of sin.
For absolution to have its affect on our soul we have to mean what we say in confession.
If she confesses to living in a situation and not being married and has no intension of getting out of the situation. Even living in “celebacy” she is still exposing herself to scandle.

Praying for her.

Paul
 
You were asked to be her confirmation sponsor, not her spiritual advisor.

If you are not comfortable with being your friend’s sponsor in her situation, you can always say, “No,” and explain politely why.
 
rianredd8810 said:
Hello everybody!!

Yesterday, a good friend of mine asked me to be her confirmation sponsor! I was very excited, and praised God for her wanting to return to the faith. However; her situation is tricky, and I need some help…

She is currently living with her boyfriend. Their relationship is one that is involves intimacy that should only be shared between married couples. When I asked her about her situation, she told me that her boyfriend provided much financial support, and that she could not afford to educate herself if it was not for his income. She is from the Washington DC area, and had no one here to fall on except her boyfriend.I told her that because of her living situation, much needed to be analyzed about it. She one day wants to marry her boyfriend (Who is a very non-practicing, anti-catholic protestant).

My question is, given her situation, can she be Confirmed in the present time? If she were to abstain from all sexual activity, could she then make a sincere confession and receive the sacrament?🤷

Thanks

-Ryan
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Could she receive the Sacrament of Confirmation, Of course, in a state of Mortal sin! She would commit the sin of Sacrilege in the process by intentionally doing so. She could abstain from all sexual activity, go to Confession with the intent of not returning to the activity until after the Marriage. .
 
bpbasilphx said:
You were asked to be her confirmation sponsor, not her spiritual advisor.

If you are not comfortable with being your friend’s sponsor in her situation, you can always say, “No,” and explain politely why.
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Then can you please explain to me what my duty as a Confirmation Sponsor is, if not to guide her in her walk with Christ?
 
rianredd8810 said:
Then can you please explain to me what my duty as a Confirmation Sponsor is, if not to guide her in her walk with Christ?
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That is exactly correct. You stand up and present her to the Bishop, explaining that she lives out her Christian life in a Catholic manner. You are to be her guide on the path to the Sacrament of Confirmation. You also have the responsibility to stand up and say, NO! She is not ready to receive this Sacrament, she does not live out her Catholic Faith in her everyday life.
 
What should be done about people who live together, but because of their faith, they abstain from any sexual activity?
 
TBolt1000T said:
What should be done about people who live together, but because of their faith, they abstain from any sexual activity?
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They should learn to live on their own, support themselves, In the long run it is acyually better for them even from a social standpoint, as well as a spiritual one. We actuall learn to be alone with God when we have no one else to turn to, even if only for a few minutes each day.
 
pcarros3 said:
What if the two partners have a child together and are engaged?
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If the child is old enough to understand that mom and dad are living together and are not married, then this is a worse sin because they are also scandalizing their own child.
 
Wow! What answers! What comes to mind immediately to me is: “he who is without sin, cast the first stone.” Even the woman who committed adultery was forgiven by the Lord, as everyone dropped their stones! The answers I am reading all stand in judgment of your friend, a sin in its own right. You were asked (as someone else said) to be her sponsor and you should do just that. Talk to her, try to guide her and pray for her, but do not judge her. Your actions and friendship and prayer will guide the way. Is she going to change her living situation? I doubt it. But, perhaps your presence and the grace of the Holy Spirit as she is confirmed might just be the catalyst that guides her. She needs you and I say that you, by the grace of God, commit yourself to being her sponsor; do not judge.
Do you really think she stands alone as being the only sinful person in her preparation class? They are all sinners in some form or another, we are all sinners in some form or another. Isn’t that why Jesus died for us on the cross?
 
rondirect said:
Wow! What answers! What comes to mind immediately to me is: “he who is without sin, cast the first stone.” Even the woman who committed adultery was forgiven by the Lord, as everyone dropped their stones! The answers I am reading all stand in judgment of your friend, a sin in its own right. You were asked (as someone else said) to be her sponsor and you should do just that. Talk to her, try to guide her and pray for her, but do not judge her. Your actions and friendship and prayer will guide the way. Is she going to change her living situation? I doubt it. But, perhaps your presence and the grace of the Holy Spirit as she is confirmed might just be the catalyst that guides her. She needs you and I say that you, by the grace of God, commit yourself to being her sponsor; do not judge.
Do you really think she stands alone as being the only sinful person in her preparation class? They are all sinners in some form or another, we are all sinners in some form or another. Isn’t that why Jesus died for us on the cross?
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Ok, nobody walked up to this person on the street and started screaming that they’re a sinner. The question was asked, the only charitable response is to answer with the truth.
 
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