Coming back to the faith?

[Curry]

Well I never really stopped believing in Christianity or renounced the Church or anything like that. But I have stopped practicing for a while now. I have good things in life going for me and some not so great things. I had a possible child with a woman who won’t let me see that kid. Her and her family mock and harass me. Knowing it will get at me. And it does. I say things that are very crass. I lose my temper. I raise my voice at my fiancee even though she’s been nothing but kind to me. Tonight I really looked at myself. I did not like what I saw. I used to be a shy, nice person. Now I spend my time either overly stressed out or partying. I want to come back to Catholicism but I’m not sure how if that makes any sense? I miss God but I’m unsure if God misses me. And I’m not sure how to go about it? Stepping into a church would honestly feel uncomfortable to me. No matter what positive changes I make my family and my fiancee and her family will see me differently. It’s all a little frightening.

 

[Cor_ad_Cor]

You can be absolutely 100% assured that God misses you. Read the story of the prodigal son. He’s waiting for you. Just reach out to your local priest who can guide you on the steps appropriate for your situation.

Stepping into a church would honestly feel uncomfortable to me.

So? It doesn’t sound like you’re very comfortable with what’s going on now, but comfort is not an indicator of good.

No matter what positive changes I make my family and my fiancee and her family will see me differently.

That sounds like a good thing.

It’s all a little frightening.

Which is why none of us do this alone. We do it together, as Church. There are many of us here, reading your post, who will be praying for you, and I promise you’ll find some in person to journey with you if you just take the first step. It may not be easy - but it will be worth it.

 

[Tis_Bearself]

God misses you. He is waiting there with open arms for you to come back. He’s literally waiting every day to see if this will be the day you come back, like the father of the Prodigal Son.

If “stepping into a church would feel uncomfortable to you” then the way to get around it is to step into a church every day until it feels comfortable again.

Regarding what your family and fiancee and her family will think, sounds like if you were raised Catholic and your finacee is a kind person, they migth be pretty positive on the idea of you getting right with God.

As to how to go about it, simply go to confession and then start going to Mass every Sunday again and take it from there. That’s what I did. I was mostly not practicing for at least 15 years.

 

[Bluebright]

I came back to church after being away for a long time, best thing I ever did. I don’t think I am the only one. Somehow God sorts out all the ‘admin’ (by that I mean all my mess) for me. Just leave it up to him. Go to a mass and its unlikely to be as uncomfortable as you think. Like the previous poster said a priest can help you sort the specifics as and when you are ready.
Oh and I second the fact that God wants you, more than you can imagine. God bless you

 

[brianjmc1]

Curry,

This is just my opinion, so don't take it to the bank.

First, great that you realize that you want to change! That’s a very big starting point that you want to improve your life!!! The partying and stress go hand in hand. As having alcoholic’s in my family, the partying is an “temporary” escape from the stress. It lets you forget your problems for a short time, but this does nothing to fix the problems and usually creates more problems.
If you can, make an appointment with your local priest. Your priest can help you out in so many ways. They LIVE for this. Think of a time when you helped someone and it really affected them. How did it make you feel? This is what priests are for(I know, plus a whole lot of other things…).
Once you are comfortable(might take some time) with your priest, go make a GREAT confession. This will help with your stress. Is there someone you trust that would go to church with you? Sit all the way in the back, so you can get up to leave, if you get uncomfortable. As you get more comfortable in going to Masses, slowly move up a pew or two, closer as the un-comfortability slowly erodes. This way you will get more involved as you feel more comfortable. Baby steps…
With regards to the mother of your child, do you want to know if it is your child or you don’t care? Either way, shower them with kindness. Let them see how you changed and are trying to better your life. This will accomplish two things, first will help you internally, second, they will either respond positively, which will be good for all involved, or if they still respond negatively, you can know that its them and their issues and not you. This will also help with your stress.
God, does not miss you, He never left you!!! Think of a parent dealing with a child who is in pain(life experience). The parent still loves them, and wants to help them, but sometime the parent has to sit back and wait for the child to make a move or ask for help and come to them. Look to Mother Mary with open arms to help you get back to Christ.
Your fiancee sound like a great person, why you are worried about her and her family seeing you differently? Do you think they like the person, who you describe that you have become?

Praying for you and hope you updates us on your journey!
Brian

 

[brianjmc1]

Footsteps in the Sand

One night I dreamed a dream.
As I was walking along the beach with my Lord.
Across the dark sky flashed scenes from my life.
For each scene, I noticed two sets of footprints in the sand,
One belonging to me and one to my Lord.

After the last scene of my life flashed before me,
I looked back at the footprints in the sand.
I noticed that at many times along the path of my life,
especially at the very lowest and saddest times,
there was only one set of footprints.

This really troubled me, so I asked the Lord about it.
“Lord, you said once I decided to follow you,
You’d walk with me all the way.
But I noticed that during the saddest and most troublesome times of my life,
there was only one set of footprints.
I don’t understand why, when I needed You the most, You would leave me.”

He whispered, “My precious child, I love you and will never leave you
Never, ever, during your trials and testings.
When you saw only one set of footprints,
It was then that I carried you.”

 

[LittleFlower378]

If you were Baptized and Confirmed then go to the Sacraments, Confession and Mass. Jesus pours out his grace through the Sacraments, that will start you on the good road. And dont stop! Sunday Mass is required but even try to go to daily mass if possible and go to Confession as much as possible, atleast once a month. Jesus is the way. Find good faithful Catholics as friends and maybe join a group at the parish Church. Pray the Rosary!

 

[fide]

You’ve gotten some good encouragements and good advice here, so far. I’d like to add one bit of advice that I don’t think has been offered yet - so here I go:

Don’t just “return” to the Faith - resolve to grow in the Faith. When living things stop growing, they begin to stagnate, and eventually die. God made us to live - and therefore to grow in that Life.

How? Find some ways in your local parish: Catechism Studies, Scripture Studies, Formation in Growing in the Life of Prayer. These are essential. To not grow in the Faith - and therefore to begin to stagnate in the Faith, is the sure path to lukewarmness, boredom, and eventually to seeing no good reason at all to keep the Faith.

Pray for the graces you will need! The evil one is very happy with lukewarm and bored souls. He can suggest many wrong ways to occupy your time. He’s looking for souls to steal.

 

[Dan_Defender]

I say things that are very crass. I lose my temper. I raise my voice at my fiancee even though she’s been nothing but kind to me.

Faith and trust in God can turn your life around. Try prayer and meditation.