Commitment for life ceremony

[Diana_Catherine]

I think this is where this question belongs.

Has anyone heard of a commitment for life ceremony type of marriage. This is something I hear elderly couples are doing. I am told it is marriage without government involvement but is it really marriage? It is happening apparently in protestant churches. I know of an elderly couple doing this to save money and social security but still be married and I am not sure how to explain it to my teen.

Any one know how the Catholic church would view this? Neither one of the people I know are Catholic.

 

[runningdude]

Did your teen ask you about it? If not, then I would see no need to bring it up. Protestant’s cook up all sorts of odd things.

That being said, civil recognition is not strictly necessary for a valid marriage. In some rare instances, a Catholic bishop will approve a secret marriage for a Catholic couple, recorded in the bishop’s records, but not with the city records. It would be a binding sacramental marriage if the bishop properly approved the arrangement. This would be done for instance in a Muslim country where interfaith Muslim-Christian marriages are not permitted and thus represent a grave burden.

However, I do not know if such an arrangement is possible for Protestants. Since the attempt here is to circumvent lawful taxes and/or cut backs to social security, it does not, to me, quite meet the “grave burden” condition secret marriages usually require. It’s a toss up as to whether or not a valid exchange of consent is exchanged, creating a permanent marriage bond between the two, but I would tend to think not.

 

[hannajomar]

If it’s elderly people doing this, I’m wondering if it’s a situation where they will live as brother and sister? If that was the case, it’s not a marriage at all, but just a kind of prayer/ceremony celebrating their companionship.

 

[JimG]

Or maybe they just want to cohabitate with impunity. Or be married while keeping their government benefits. In either case, it would seem there is some deception involved, if not fraud.

 

[Dakota_Roberts]

Or maybe they just want to cohabitate with impunity. Or be married while keeping their government benefits. In either case, it would seem there is some deception involved, if not fraud.

Why does someone need to have a civil ceremony is one only wants a religious ceremony?

 

[JimG]

Why does someone need to have a civil ceremony is one only wants a religious ceremony?

One doesn’t. But the fact of a marriage is something that must be filed with the state, I believe. Most Catholics who marry in the Church have a religious ceremony only, yet their marriage is filed with the state records. Attempting to hide the marriage for monetary reasons might be construed as fraud, but I’m no lawyer.

 

[Dakota_Roberts]

One doesn’t. But the fact of a marriage is something that must be filed with the state, I believe. Most Catholics who marry in the Church have a religious ceremony only, yet their marriage is filed with the state records. Attempting to hide the marriage for monetary reasons might be construed as fraud, but I’m no lawyer.

Priests in the US are also generally able to sign marriage papers, but they don’t have to do so.

 

[JimG]

Priests in the US are also generally able to sign marriage papers, but they don’t have to do so.

Hmm, I really have no idea about the legalities of that. Normally a priest who witnesses a couple’s wedding acts as both an agent of the Church as well as the State. That’s why he signs the marriage certificate at the end of the ceremony. Would it be legal for him to keep the wedding a secret? Or for that matter, to marry a couple who did not have a marriage license from the county? Maybe somebody else knows the answer.

Even if keeping the marriage a secret from the state is legal, which I doubt, would the priest be justified in helping the couple to avoid complying with the law regarding Social Security?