F
flameburns623
Guest
I think I’ve been on this forum for about 4 years or so. I have been a fan of Catholic Answers–when I could hear it–for somewhere over twice that long, I think. In that eight years’ time I have moved from being a generic Evangelical to becoming an Episcopalian. Prior to that I was a Latter-day Saint for perhaps five or six years. Prior to that I was dabbling in various things: New Age thought, Eastern religion, agnosticism/atheism, etcetera. As a child I was raised in and exposed to various Evangelical and fundamentalist Protestant churches. In other words I have made full use of the American cafeteria of religious diversity.
I am not eager to jump ship yet again. I like being an Episcopalian. I like being in a ‘broad church’ tradition, even if I think some of my fellow-Anglicans are so broad-minded their brains have fallen out. I like it even though I decry the general apostasy occurring within The Episcopal Church. I like the Book of Common Prayer. I like the various other disciplines, the Preces Privatae, the Book of Homilies, and etcetera.
But I have to admit: the things I like most about the Episcopal Church–are the ‘Catholic’ things. I have great reservations about much that is Roman Catholic. Do a search of my posts: I have not hesitated to express my distaste for many things that Roman Catholic hold dear. I strongly hold to a perspective on soteriology–broadly known as Augustinianism–which gets tremendous short shrift in the contemporary Roman Catholic Church, so embedded is Molinism and the stress on ‘free will’.
Yet . . . .I am strongly drawn to the RCC. And . . . .although I have steadfastly denied being Roman Catholic . . . I have always used the present tense. I felt uncomfortable professing an affiliation I felt so far removed from, an affiliation I had put aside long decades ago.
Because the fact of the matter is: whatever I consider myself presently, I in fact converted to Roman Catholicism as a teenager. Converted, in fact, in the midst of a maelstrom of opposition from my family–not my immediate family, but the grandparents, uncles and aunts who were staunch members of various Protestant denominations, relatives who were very close to me emotionally because they had undertaken to be the pillars of my family while my natural father battled cancer. The relatives who in fact undertook much of the burden of the religious instruction of my brothers and I, because my parents were basically unchurched.
I might well have remained a Catholic had I remained in my home town. The little parish church to which I belonged was very conservative, hardly touched by Vatican II. It used the Novus Ordo, but with considerable use of Latin. At one point I strongly considered whether I might not have a call to religious life. The I joined the Army. This was the late 1970’s and liturgical and theological experimentation was in full swing. Many of the priests serving as chaplains were strong proponents of liberalization. Then-cardinal Ratzinger was mocked and ridiculed from the pulpit, while various speculative theologians (later condemned or censured by the Vatican) were lionized. There were very few believing, practicing Roman Catholics my age–I think I met two in four years of military service. Most practicing Catholics were considerably older than I, married, and often were NCO’s or officers, preventing them from ‘fraternizing’ with an enlisted man. I was scandalized by the Catholic Church as I was experiencing it, while at the same time I was meeting very conservative Evangelicals and Protestants whose faithfulness matched my own.
I drifted away from Catholicism, and never went back.
At this point I am NOT committing to ‘revert’ to the Church. I am exploring whether or not I feel I should. I’m not putting any specific time frame on this, but have one set of parameters I am using as a guideline. I am a divorced husband of a divorced wife: I have discussed what would be needful to nullify the past marriages of my wife and I and ‘regularize’ my present marriage. This process can apparently be done without making any absolute commitment to return to full communion with the Church. Given specific details of my situation and my wife’s the process can be relatively timely: several months to a year.
This is enough time for me to undertake some measure of personal study, prayer, and reflection. Lord knows I have enough books to begin a study of the issues that divide me from the Church. Catholic Answers bills itself as offering ‘Apologetics 101’. I think this message board, at it’s best, helps elevate that to ‘Apologetics 201’. Many of my questions are at the level of about ‘Apologetics 301’ or ‘Apologetics 401’. I’ve already figured out that somewhere around ‘Apologetics 501’ my particular intellectual abilities seem to plateau-out and things stop making a lot of sense to me. (I love GK Chesterton’s fiction, for example, but I’m doggoned I can get a handle on his prose books ‘Orthodoxy’ or ‘The Everlasting Man’). Down the road I may explore a RCIA program, though I really don’t need to go through any special program to be reunited with the Church once it is possible for my marriage to be regularized
It was difficult to decide whether or not to post something like this. I have done so as an invitation to others to join me if they choose, and because it will be easier for Catholics to help me with my questions if they know where I am coming from. Please do pray for me. Most importantly, please do NOT be hurt if the upshot of my explorations does not end in the way you hope it will do.
God bless. Have a blessed Good Friday and Happy Easter!
I am not eager to jump ship yet again. I like being an Episcopalian. I like being in a ‘broad church’ tradition, even if I think some of my fellow-Anglicans are so broad-minded their brains have fallen out. I like it even though I decry the general apostasy occurring within The Episcopal Church. I like the Book of Common Prayer. I like the various other disciplines, the Preces Privatae, the Book of Homilies, and etcetera.
But I have to admit: the things I like most about the Episcopal Church–are the ‘Catholic’ things. I have great reservations about much that is Roman Catholic. Do a search of my posts: I have not hesitated to express my distaste for many things that Roman Catholic hold dear. I strongly hold to a perspective on soteriology–broadly known as Augustinianism–which gets tremendous short shrift in the contemporary Roman Catholic Church, so embedded is Molinism and the stress on ‘free will’.
Yet . . . .I am strongly drawn to the RCC. And . . . .although I have steadfastly denied being Roman Catholic . . . I have always used the present tense. I felt uncomfortable professing an affiliation I felt so far removed from, an affiliation I had put aside long decades ago.
Because the fact of the matter is: whatever I consider myself presently, I in fact converted to Roman Catholicism as a teenager. Converted, in fact, in the midst of a maelstrom of opposition from my family–not my immediate family, but the grandparents, uncles and aunts who were staunch members of various Protestant denominations, relatives who were very close to me emotionally because they had undertaken to be the pillars of my family while my natural father battled cancer. The relatives who in fact undertook much of the burden of the religious instruction of my brothers and I, because my parents were basically unchurched.
I might well have remained a Catholic had I remained in my home town. The little parish church to which I belonged was very conservative, hardly touched by Vatican II. It used the Novus Ordo, but with considerable use of Latin. At one point I strongly considered whether I might not have a call to religious life. The I joined the Army. This was the late 1970’s and liturgical and theological experimentation was in full swing. Many of the priests serving as chaplains were strong proponents of liberalization. Then-cardinal Ratzinger was mocked and ridiculed from the pulpit, while various speculative theologians (later condemned or censured by the Vatican) were lionized. There were very few believing, practicing Roman Catholics my age–I think I met two in four years of military service. Most practicing Catholics were considerably older than I, married, and often were NCO’s or officers, preventing them from ‘fraternizing’ with an enlisted man. I was scandalized by the Catholic Church as I was experiencing it, while at the same time I was meeting very conservative Evangelicals and Protestants whose faithfulness matched my own.
I drifted away from Catholicism, and never went back.
At this point I am NOT committing to ‘revert’ to the Church. I am exploring whether or not I feel I should. I’m not putting any specific time frame on this, but have one set of parameters I am using as a guideline. I am a divorced husband of a divorced wife: I have discussed what would be needful to nullify the past marriages of my wife and I and ‘regularize’ my present marriage. This process can apparently be done without making any absolute commitment to return to full communion with the Church. Given specific details of my situation and my wife’s the process can be relatively timely: several months to a year.
This is enough time for me to undertake some measure of personal study, prayer, and reflection. Lord knows I have enough books to begin a study of the issues that divide me from the Church. Catholic Answers bills itself as offering ‘Apologetics 101’. I think this message board, at it’s best, helps elevate that to ‘Apologetics 201’. Many of my questions are at the level of about ‘Apologetics 301’ or ‘Apologetics 401’. I’ve already figured out that somewhere around ‘Apologetics 501’ my particular intellectual abilities seem to plateau-out and things stop making a lot of sense to me. (I love GK Chesterton’s fiction, for example, but I’m doggoned I can get a handle on his prose books ‘Orthodoxy’ or ‘The Everlasting Man’). Down the road I may explore a RCIA program, though I really don’t need to go through any special program to be reunited with the Church once it is possible for my marriage to be regularized
It was difficult to decide whether or not to post something like this. I have done so as an invitation to others to join me if they choose, and because it will be easier for Catholics to help me with my questions if they know where I am coming from. Please do pray for me. Most importantly, please do NOT be hurt if the upshot of my explorations does not end in the way you hope it will do.
God bless. Have a blessed Good Friday and Happy Easter!