Conditional Baptism

[FrDavid96]

Yes of course.

When I intially asked her about it she said she used the trinitarian formula and water. But, when asked to write it down to give as evidence to the priest she became uneasy and claimed no longer to remember whether or not she used water.

One of two things is happening:

1. What she says is true and she cannot remember.
2. She believes that because the baptism was not performed by a priest it is invalid, and sees the only way to have me baptized “properly” is to say she never did. (This is evidenced by the many times she petitioned my parents to have a priest baptize me as a young child.) In my conversation with her, she claims to have “conditionally baptized” me with the intent that a priest would do it properly later on. I explained to her that it didn’t work this way and the first baptism would be considered valid. This was when her memory became fuzzy.

Nevertheless, I believe my priest is correct in ruling conditional baptism as necessary in my case.

I just realized something as I re-read your posts. In them, you always seem to say that she spoke “to you.” Have you asked a priest to speak with her specifically about this? More importantly, have you asked your pastor himself to speak with her? Is that even possible, or does she live too far away? Perhaps her memory will clear up a little if she’s speaking directly to a priest…especially a priest who is explaining that he wants to do things right and supply the rites of the Church, and therefore needs to know exactly what happened.

If I found myself in that situation, I would not approach it from the point of view of trying to convince her that baptism is not necessary, and I’m trying to prove it’s unnecessary.

I personally would approach it by saying that it’s important for me to do things the right way when I supply the rites of the Church for your grandson, so please try to remember and be very specific.

That’s just what I might do in a similar situation.

 

[Jsmith17]

I just realized something as I re-read your posts. In them, you always seem to say that she spoke “to you.” Have you asked a priest to speak with her specifically about this? More importantly, have you asked your pastor himself to speak with her? Is that even possible, or does she live too far away? Perhaps her memory will clear up a little if she’s speaking directly to a priest…especially a priest who is explaining that he wants to do things right and supply the rites of the Church, and therefore needs to know exactly what happened.

If I found myself in that situation, I would not approach it from the point of view of trying to convince her that baptism is not necessary, and I’m trying to prove it’s unnecessary.

I personally would approach it by saying that it’s important for me to do things the right way when I supply the rites of the Church for your grandson, so please try to remember and be very specific.

That’s just what I might do in a similar situation.

She now lives in a remote part of the Philippines, our conversation took place about 4 months ago when she was visiting us. I attempted to arrange a meeting between her and my priest while she was here, but it never logistically worked out. The only reliable means of contacting her now is through mail.

The conditional baptism itself doesn’t concern me as much as the timing of it. If I am conditionally baptized, I do not wish for it to be public.

 

[Phemie]

The conditional baptism is done in private because of the confusion it could cause if done publicly.