I would set up the appointment so you don’t feel rushed. I did this. While I was not away from the church physically, spiritually I hadn’t been “with it” for almost 15 years. The only way I can explain it is that I showed up for church. I became what I call, “a lapsed Catholic in the pew”. It all come crashing down on me when Pope John Paul II was dying. Up until the point that Pope Benedict was selected, I just stayed in my room in a deep remorse as neglect of God and violations of my faith began to come visible to me.
I then read something by a pastor of another parish - one that I was strongly encouraged to visit. He had an article published at his website and then I realized I needed confession - bad. He agreed to hear my confession and when I got there and he closed the door to his office I told him, “I’ve been grounded by God for the last two weeks and have been unable to come out of my room.” We entered confession right at the beginning and did dialogue style as it took time for me to work my way up to the biggies. I had never confessed face fo face before but promised God I would do so this time just as an act of humility. It really brought forth the graces.
What is good about the Sacrament of Penance is that it requires an act of humility. You are not only confessing known sins, but you are enabling the priest to form your conscience as you move forward. It is this part that takes me back about every two weeks even when there is no serious sin. It is through the Sacrament of Penance that, once serious sin is halted, we can progress in holiness through the practice of virtue. Virtue building is rewarding and very God pleasing.
However, I will caution you that when things begin to steamroll, you may find yourself wanting to go back as other memories come flooding back. This is not uncommon. The Holy Spirit drove me back to “unload” about every two weeks. After this initial purge was done, I retained the twice monthly use of the sacrament. I found it was very good, if not almost necessary for my peace of mind to acknowledge those things that I did not know were sinful at the time - as a way to say, “I understand now and this signals my change of heart”. I also did not know that if we recall a sin after leaving, we are obligated to tell it next time, if it is mortal. While it is forgiven, it still requires us to acknowledge it and you can still go to communion if you received absolution and had not purposely withheld a sin. Withhholding something purposely results in a more serious sin being committed because the Holy Spirit cannot be tricked. If you thought of it, it wants to be stated. It is the way the spirit cleanses.
I found some of these things helpful. Several are “Examination of Conscience”. If you scroll to the bottom of the first one, you will see that there is something that explains the steps to making a confession. I put several Examens here because what one doesn’t catch another does. I found it interesting to read through them. All link back to the ten commandments.
God bless!
catholic.org/frz/examen/examen_mortal.htm
theworkofgod.org/Library/examine.htm
frpat.com/examen.htm
2heartsnetwork.org/sinsagainstSpirit.htm
