Confession Anxiety

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How can I get over the embarrassment I feel before going to Confession? I know Father won’t condemn or speak too harshly to me and as a Priest he’s bound by Canon Law never to tell anyone that is confessed no matter what and he’s heard a thousand times worse and heard the dame kinds of things a thousand times but that still doesn’t put my mind at ease.
 
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How can I get over the embarrassment I feel before going to Confession? I know Father won’t condemn or speak too harshly to me and as a Priest he’s bound by Canon Law never to tell anyone that is confessed no matter what and he’s heard a thousand times worse and heard the dame kinds of things a thousand times but that still doesn’t put my mind at ease.
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Go frequently.

You’ll never feel “great” about going–it’s about sin–to face our weaknesses is humbling and sometimes humiliating–but go often and you’ll find you sin less and it takes the pressure off trying to remember it all (that was my problem–feeling like I missed something, remembering it later, embarrassed I didn’t know what to say…)

…edit: duh!:whacky: I forgot to say… and Grace will increase with frequent confession!
 
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starrs0:
How can I get over the embarrassment I feel before going to Confession? I know Father won’t condemn or speak too harshly to me and as a Priest he’s bound by Canon Law never to tell anyone that is confessed no matter what and he’s heard a thousand times worse and heard the dame kinds of things a thousand times but that still doesn’t put my mind at ease.
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I think the embarrassment is part of the penance. It’s a mark of how vain we are. Embarrasment is a symptom of shame – and that’s a GOOD thing! If you’re not ashamed of yourself, then you’re not paying attention.

In Shakespeare’s Measure for Measure Juliet, who is pregant out of wedlock, is interrogated by Duke Vincentio disguised as a friar:

**DUKE VINCENTIO: **Repent you, fair one, of the sin you carry?

**JULIET: **I do; and bear the shame most patiently.

Accepting our shame with joy can be a very beautiful humility.

Sometimes (and it *still *happens to me at a painfully advanced age) when I’m really, really ashamed of myself (and come next Saturday, I have to cough up one of those embarrassing sins that just ran up and bit me when I wasn’t looking), I just say – “Father, this is so embarrassing, but here goes” ta da ta da ta da."

The point is, just *DO *it! Confession can’t possibly be worse than not confessing. And you’ll be FREE!
 
If possible go to another parish with a priest you don’t know.

Don’t get into the habit of not confessing the embarassing sins. I used to do this and then found out later that we are required to confess all mortal sins by kind and (approximate) number for our confession to be valid. I went and receieved a general confession (confessing all the embarassing sins) and have been growing stronger in faith ever since. Even though confessing all the embarassing sins wasn’t something I liked doing, I’m extremely glad I was moved to do it and hope more people frequent the great Sacrament of Reconciliation.
 
A little embarrassment is a good thing. I recently had my first confession in several years (yes, that’s one of the things we talked about!) and was so nervous beforehand. My priest is a good man, I knew he wouldn’t make fun of me or be hateful, but I was still nervous. It’s part of the owning up to what we’ve done. Be embarrassed and nervous, but go anyway!
 
One thing that helped me when I was first starting to go to Confession regularly and was very nervous was to have someone go with me (although obviously not go into the confessional with me). I wouldn’t make a big deal out of it, but I’d say something like, “I’m going to Confession tomorrow. Do you want to meet me there?” Knowing that someone would be waiting for me helped me to overcome the anxiety because as nervous as I was, the thought of explaining why I wasn’t there when I’d promised to be was even worse. This was also great because one time I asked a person who hadn’t gone in five years, and he agreed to go. His willingness to go made me feel a lot less nervous about my own confession.
 
I came across this passage from Pius XII while reading his encyclical, On the Mystical Body of Christ, paragraph 88. They’ve helped me and I hope they help you.

“We will that the pious practice of frequent confession, which was introduced into the Church by the inspiration of the Holy Spirit, should be earnestly advocated. By it

genuine self-knowledge is increased,

Christian humility grows,

bad habits are corrected,

spiritual neglect and tepidity are resisted,

the conscience is purified,

the will strengthened,

a salutary self-control is attained,

and grace is increased in virtue of the Sacrament itself.

Let those, therefore, among the younger clergy who make light of or lessen esteem for frequent confession realize that what they are doing is alien to the Spirit of Christ and disastrous for the Mystical Body of our Savior.”

Grace and peace,
Gene
 
…in my humble opinion… Confession Anxiety is just the greek/hebrew word for PRIDE…:eek:

…being humbled is not a bad thing… sometimes its very theraputic.:cool:

…Peace:thumbsup:
 
I feel very anxious before going to confession (anxiety is not normal for me), I ask God to grant me the courage to make a good confession.
 
Greetings!
Although all the previous replies are in the same vein as what I think i’ll be saying, i want to reaffirm that those feelings are ‘normal’; at least i’m interpreting them as a type of contrition and compunction–(which don’t have to be a strong feeling–it is essentially an act of the will…)
Since so many of us have lost the sense of sin, i’d say this is a great grace you received—maybe later you’ll be dry as a bone heading to confession and the memory will help your faith!

being a 20 year practioner of ‘devotional’ confession, i can attest to the paradoxical effect frequent confession can have–it can be easier in terms of having developed a habit (the virtue of religion)
and harder because little things loom bigger precisely as the objectively big sins are diminishing: to commit the same ‘stupid’ venial sins over & over is very humbling!

if i needed to confess mortal sins that if i told my regular confessor i would avoid the sacrament, then i’d go out a distance and find another priest.
otherwise, i try to stay with the same 1 or 2 confessors
sometimes a retreat is a good place to unload the heavy stuff.
God Bless.
erinozak
 
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