Confession at a Tridentine Parish

[UncleBill]

So true!

The most severe tongue lashing I ever received by a diocesan priest was a couple of years ago.

In fact, after this particular confession, I finally understood why some people, once they get “yelled at” in confession, don’t return to confession ever again for fear of encountering the same treatment, or leave the Church all together.

Anyone who leaves the church because they received a tongue lashing in confession, were most likely looking for a reason to leave anyway…hardly the actions of someone who takes their faith seriously.

 

[UncleBill]

Vatican II has nothing to do with it. I have had both severe and fuzzy confessions from FSSP priests and severe and fuzzy confessions from diocesan priests. It’s the confessor, not the council.

Don’t try and give me that garbage…the whole notion of the need to confess our sins…and the idea of sin itself changed after the council along with the new mass…probably not due to the the council…but the whole ethos of confession did change.

 

[Lormar]

Anyone who leaves the church because they received a tongue lashing in confession, were most likely looking for a reason to leave anyway…hardly the actions of someone who takes their faith seriously.

Only God would know that.

 

[UncleBill]

Only God would know that.

Do you really think that someone who had true faith would leave the church due to a harsh confession? I don’t believe it!

 

[porthos11]

Don’t try and give me that garbage…the whole notion of the need to confess our sins…and the idea of sin itself changed after the council along with the new mass…probably not due to the the council…but the whole ethos of confession did change.

No, it did not. Read the Catechism of the Catholic Church and you will see that the teaching has remained unchanged.

 

[UncleBill]

No, it did not. Read the Catechism of the Catholic Church and you will see that the teaching has remained unchanged.

That’s nice…that’s very very nice! Your probably not old enough to have lived through both pre and post Vatican II life in the church.

Forget about what you read in documents and talk to some folks who haves actually lived through those terrible times.

 

[porthos11]

That’s nice…that’s very very nice! Your probably not old enough to have lived through both pre and post Vatican II life in the church.

Forget about what you read in documents and talk to some folks who haves actually lived through those terrible times.

No.

I was indeed born post Vatican-II but I’m no slouch. I know what the council said and I know my own challenges and I know what the Catholic Church teaches. I know what my priests teach and they teach the same faith, so I don’t know what you went through, and because of your rudeness, I also do not care. All I know of is that the Church teaches what she teaches and it remains unchanged, which is why I remain Catholic.

Dismissing people’s views as “garbage” is hardly appropriate.

 

[UncleBill]

No.

I was indeed born post Vatican-II but I’m no slouch. I know what the council said and I know my own challenges and I know what the Catholic Church teaches. I know what my priests teach and they teach the same faith, so I don’t know what you went through, and because of your rudeness, I also do not care. All I know of is that the Church teaches what she teaches and it remains unchanged, which is why I remain Catholic.

Dismissing people’s views as “garbage” is hardly appropriate.

No one here spoke about what the church teaches, we were speaking about going to confession…I don’t recall saying that the Church had changed her teaching…what I did say was that the practice of going to confession had changed greatly in three post Vatican II Church…like it or not that’s the way it is/was.

 

[babochka]

Asking if you have also committed specific *other *sins is not the same as asking for clarification.

I get the asking for clarification. I do not get asking about other sins that haven’t already been mentioned.

Perhaps he was trying to lead the individual in a more thorough examination of conscience. Often, when a person commits a particular sin, there are other sins related to the first and the person might not have considered them. I find it helpful when my confessor asks leading questions like this. It is not my goal in confession to go through a laundry list and get out of there.

 

[DarkLight]

Do you really think that someone who had true faith would leave the church due to a harsh confession? I don’t believe it!

I submit that part of the Church’s job is to nourish the faith of the weak so it may become stronger. Who knows if a kind word may encourage someone to stay and accept what they need to gain a strong faith?

 

[babochka]

Anyone who leaves the church because they received a tongue lashing in confession, were most likely looking for a reason to leave anyway…hardly the actions of someone who takes their faith seriously.

Wow. It seems like you’ve been blessed with a strong faith all your life. You’re never been teetering on the edge, wondering if you have any real faith left at all. You’ve never had to talk yourself into going to confession, even though your mind is struggling with the very concept of confession. You’ve never felt the uncertainty and vulnerability felt by someone who is struggling to hold on to faith by a very thin thread and you’ve never experienced how a kind and patient confessor can help you out of the darkness. Maybe you’ve never walked into confession after a decade away, desperate for the kind of reception that the forgiving father gave to the prodigal son. Maybe you’ve never made a confession that is shallow and insincere, because it is the best you could do at the time and you know you’re “supposed” to go to confession. God wants to heal all of these sinners through his sacraments.

Try to have a little compassion for those of weaker faith.

 

[babochka]

I submit that part of the Church’s job is to nourish the faith of the weak so it may become stronger. Who knows if a kind word may encourage someone to stay and accept what they need to gain a strong faith?

 

[Gidge]

No one here spoke about what the church teaches, we were speaking about going to confession…I don’t recall saying that the Church had changed her teaching…what I did say was that the practice of going to confession had changed greatly in three post Vatican II Church…like it or not that’s the way it is/was.

Exactly.
There seems to be a need by many on this forum to point out the legitimacy of Vatican II
whenever anything pre 1962 is mentioned.

If a business owner kept saying “I’m honest, I will not cheat you” for no apparent reason, would you keep on patronizing them ?
I would be suspicious and probably take my trade elsewhere.

The custom/protocol of confession has greatly changed in the past 40+ years, and that is a fact.

 

[crazzeto]

I’m not sure if it was just a specific priest but when I had my confession at a Tridentine parish that they wanted to know more about my sins and liked to ask more questions to sins that I’ve possibly committed but have not said.

This is compared to my Novus ordo parish which just listens to the sins I say and doesn’t go further to find the details of my sins or others that I might be holding back.

Sounds like a good confessor, I would continue going to them.

 

[Gidge]

Sounds like a good confessor, I would continue going to them.

Which one-- the former or the latter (I vote for the former) ?

 

[commenter]

Exactly.
There seems to be a need by many on this forum to point out the legitimacy of Vatican II
whenever anything pre 1962 is mentioned.

If a business owner kept saying “I’m honest, I will not cheat you” for no apparent reason, would you keep on patronizing them ?
I would be suspicious and probably take my trade elsewhere.

The custom/protocol of confession has greatly changed in the past 40+ years, and that is a fact.

Confessors are dealing with people far less aware of the Catholic Faith than 40 years ago. Thus, you might mention one kind of sin that the priest knows is often accompanied by another kind of action, that Catholics today often don’t know can be sinful, or at least imprudent. It’s necessary for a confessor to ask if that related area is also an issue for you, not to “catch” you but to offer help you might not even realize you need. Of course it has to be done in a gentle way. The priest not only has to consider your feelings at this moment, but your well being in the long run. In this area, and in so many others, priests have a harder job, with a lot less support, than their predecessors of 2 generations ago. Pray for them. (Come to think of it, I have never prayed for the priest while waiting in line for confession, or afterwards).

 

[Gidge]

"…Of course it has to be done in a gentle way. The priest not only has to consider your feelings at this moment, but your well being in the long run. In this area, and in so many others, priests have a harder job, with a lot less support, than their predecessors of 2 generations ago. Pray for them. (Come to think of it, I have never prayed for the priest while waiting in line for confession, or afterwards) ".

It is good to pray for the priest (I try to say a Hail Mary for the priest after I say my penance) it is also good to say “Thank you Father” before leaving the confessional.

Priests have different styles, some are more direct than others, some people need “tough love” – try not to take the priest’s style personally-- he is acting *in persona Christi *and acting as a good father should when admonishing one of his spiritual children for their sins (a spiritual work of mercy, btw).

 

[JuantheTuba]

I get what UncleBill is saying, yes, while on paper the teachings, doctrines, and rubrics of the Faith regarding Confession haven’t changed. So, in theory nothing should’ve really changed except that you might hear your absolution in the vernacular, but in practice the whole attitude and culture towards the Sacrament has changed, on a wide scale, maybe there are whole regions and parishes that have carried on the traditions, but there are also many who have sought to “reinvent” the Sacrament in the “spirit of V-II”.

For example, I normally go to my FSSP parish for confession, but once in while I’ll go to the parish by my house, it’s one of those typical middle-of-the-road suburban parishes, not too traditional but not off-the-walls liberal either, pretty represenative of my diocese in general, this particular occassion I called to set up an appoinment because it was a Thursday and I was serving Solemn High Mass the next day and I was in a state of mortal sin, and I wouldn’t be able to get to confession the day of the Mass. So I call the number provided, the parish secretary picks up, I ask if there’s a priest available(this parish has three priests) to hear my confession in the afternoon, the lady checks, and before she tells me yes or no, she asked me question as to why I needed to go to confession, why couldn’t I go at the alloted confession time(1 hour on Saturday), etc. etc. I answered her questions, apperantly it wasn’t enough to say I’m in a state of Mortal sin, I had to say exactly why I had to go to Confession that day. I had a feeling thhat she was trying to deter me. Regardless, I was able to get to confession that day. This hasn’t been my only issue regarding confession at this parish, nor has it only been at this parish, I’ve been to places were you walk into the confessional and there’s a sofa were you can sit on or recline while you “talk” with the priest, I’ve had experiences were I start my confession, then Father tells me " Okay, stop there, now tell me exactly what is bothering you?" or the infamous “Well, that;s not a sin(anymore)”
From my own experience there’s only two places were I’ve had a confession the “traditional” way, my FSSP parish and one other parish in my diocese where the priest is older and probably was ordained pre V-II.

 

[PaulinVA]

Don’t try and give me that garbage…the whole notion of the need to confess our sins…and the idea of sin itself changed after the council along with the new mass…probably not due to the the council…but the whole ethos of confession did change.

You are absolutely right.

The ethos has changed from everyone lining up every week to tell the priest the littlest sins so you don’t go to hell to addressing those sinful areas in your life and truly reforming your life.

I personally think that an emphasis on personal growth and reconciliation with Christ and His Church is better than it was.

 

[Gidge]

You are absolutely right.

I personally think that an emphasis on personal growth and reconciliation with Christ and His Church is better than it was.

Where I live (New England) I have not found this to be the case. How can one move toward personal growth when confession is almost never mentioned from the pulpit and a parish of 3,000 members only offers confession once a week for an hour or half hour ?

We must remove the stumbling block (sin) before we can ever hope to attain this personal growth that you speak of.

If an opera singer has laryngitis (stumbling block) is it better to tell her that laryngitis is no longer considered an impediment to her singing career (I’ve had priests tell me incorrectly that known mortal sins are no longer mortal), or is it better to get her the medicine (confession) to clear up the condition, heal, and then get on with her personal growth as an opera singer ?