Just because you are encouraged to go to confession does not mean that you are not sorry for your sins. The priest can not force you to take confession, but you can not force him to marry you either.
If you don’t mind would you let us know what the priest says / does in this situation?
Well I am glad you are willing to do this for your husband, it is very loving of you, and shows a great amount of love for him that you are willing to do go outside your comfort zone. I definitely suggest speaking with your priest about all of your feelings. He is there to help. As others have said, he doesn’t bite.
To answer your question(s), I simply have fallen away from the church, for years thought maybe “someday” I would return but after 20 years I am just not interested anymore and this annulment process has been an absolute nightmare for both my husband and our marriage which just intensified my distrust with the church. We still haven’t had our marriage covalidated because of recommendations of the tribunal that had to be fulfilled beforehand, now that we finished that we can set a date…within the next couple of weeks but I am not going to go to confession because our priest said that “I should go but he can’t make me go”, so I am opting out because I don’t intend to practice the faith in any way, including taking communion. I want a simple 10 minute get together, just my husband and myself to get this covalidation done but our priest thinks our kids should be there and some witnesses and now its turning into a mess…I was willing to use the church secretaries as witnesses just to get it over with. I am beginning to think this was just the beginning of a long fight. I also believe that its wrong to ask any family, friends, or our children to be there because in the eyes of the church we are fixing a mistake and I don’t think it needs to be announced how awful we are, living in sin all these years and now having to take our vows over AGAIN. Besides the children would be learning that its ok to get married “after” they were born, so we have a huge amount of decision making to do in the next couple of weeks. Also we DONT live as “brother and sister”, that to me, is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard suggested by anyone. So, as you can see I am not in accordance with the churches beliefs and will struggle to just get this done so my poor husband can go to confession and communion…it hardly seems worth it in my eyes but he is determined and I love him so I will “go thru with the drama” to make him happy.
as a wife this is your duty in any case. As he is or wants to be reconciled with the Church quite frankly you have no right to hinder him. Yes since both of you are Catholic you must each make a sacramental confession in order to be receptive of the graces of the sacrament of matrimony. Whether or not you confess yourself, the marriage will still be valid, and enable your husband to return to the Eucharist and full communion with the Church–and save his immortal soul, if that is a concern of yours. The status of your children, or those of his first marriage (if any) is not affected one way or another by either the annulment or the convalidation so that is a non-issue. Yes you can have as quiet and private a ceremony as you wish, with only the witnesses required by law who can by anyone. I have no doubt your husband will be praying earnestly, as we are, for your own restoration to the Church and the graces of Christ mediated in her sacraments, as we will do here. There needs to be no drama unless you choose to add it by your own reactions and comments. If Christ could put up with the drama of persecution and death to save us from our sins, we can certainly make an effort to ask for and receive the graces he so merited for us.