Confession Issues

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Lilsheep88

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I’m sorry I dont mean to be emo. It isnt my intention to bombard these forums with my own personal problems but I am just scared and confused and I have noone else to talk to.

So… I am still feeling guilty about my not-so-godly past… Ive confessed this a couple of months back but yet its still haunting me… The memories are still very fresh in my mind and it has been haunting me to the point that sometimes I cannot sleep at night (night sweats)… . I have this lingering feeling that despite that I have made several visits to the confessional, that God hasnt completely, 100% forgiven me yet and there still a pending punishment waiting out there to be dealt to me just “to get things even”… and because of this I have not felt a sense of peace, but instead I am in a constant state of worry and anxiety… After all, I have been a bad kid and he has every right to punish me so his punishment is just. If he wishes to ruin my life, its totally called and legit for because I have disrepected him and broke his commandments several times. If he can punish JOB, a totally good man, why SHOULDNT he punish and spare me? A sinner?

I have a feeling that God’s retribution is coming for me any day now and I should be on a lookout for it. I knew I was gona regret what I did… and I am just overwhelmed by this regret

I have been goign to confession several weeks straight but I am still being tormented by my past… I relive each moment as if it were yesterday, as if it were something that I cant bury in my past. I spoke to my priest about it (the one I see regularly for weekly confession) but all he can say to me me is “ahh dont worry about it God has forgiven you”… thats it?? Or maybe its because I havent told him the “full, clear details” of my past… idk.

If this were so, then why do I still feel guilty about it? Why cant I move on with and start a fresh new slate in life?.. Ive tried everything, countless rosaries, divine mercy devotions, novenas and I am still overwhelmed by guilt and worry and anxiety… as if I were just awaiting punishment from God any day now. and I am not talking about the next life but in this life (something like karma)… and I am just scared that maybe “WHAT IF” God will hold my past against me come judgement day despite the fact that I have been going to confession on a weekly basis… What if hell hold my past against me? I have placed my trust in God’s mercy and have reaffirmed this many times in front of the Divine Mercy image… but why do I still feel like this? Help please. While your at it, I could also use some prayers… thank you all god bless.
 
If the priest (and so God) says you are absolved of those sins, who are you to say that it may be otherwise. Often tho’ we see our own unforgiveness of ourselves as what God “thinks”.
Although you may have ‘attachments’ to those sins or earthly consequences to be dealt with in purgatory (or on earth), they are not unforgiven sins that will 'cause you to lose your immortal soul. God is Merciful after-all. Have faith in Him to have forgiven you and be easy on yourself.
 
Up till about a few years ago I felt similar with a sin that I committed. what changed for me was learning that God forgives when we ask and by us not accepting that we are limiting God in his power which is the evil one trying to create doubt in our minds. This doubt would creep back into my mind especially when I would do the sin again. I would think myself unworthy and full of shame. Even when I asked God for forgiveness I didn’t believe he could forgive someone like me who commits the same sin month after month. But I learned and today I am a lot happier because God does forgive all when we ask. It is done.

As the other poster said, “your sins are forgiven” they are. Take hope in that. Pray in thanksgiving of that confession.
 
michaelmas said:
Up till about a few years ago I felt similar with a sin that I committed. what changed for me was learning that God forgives when we ask and by us not accepting that we are limiting God in his power which is the evil one trying to create doubt in our minds. This doubt would creep back into my mind especially when I would do the sin again. I would think myself unworthy and full of shame. Even when I asked God for forgiveness I didn’t believe he could forgive someone like me who commits the same sin month after month. But I learned and today I am a lot happier because God does forgive all when we ask. It is done.

As the other poster said, “your sins are forgiven” they are. Take hope in that. Pray in thanksgiving of that confession.
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This.
 
God speaks through His priest in the sacrament of Confession. When God says, “I absolve you,” your pride is so great you can’t accept it. You are saying, “I am the greatest sinner. My sins are greater than God’s ability to forgive.”

Perhaps this is the sin you should be confessing! All the others God has forgiven and forgotten.
 
Try praying the Chaplet of Divine Mercy on a regular basis, not omitting the optional opening and closing prayer.
 
This is exactly what Jesus’ mission was about–to seek and save that which was lost! If we have no hope in the saving power of God’s grace, which is given to all who trust in the power of the Savior’s Precious Blood, then we of all men are most miserable. But we do have hope, as we are now sons and heirs of the Most High God, who cry Abba, Father!
 
Are you perhaps fearing a natural consequence of your wrongdoing? If I drive carelessly and injure someone, then I will be filled with remorse, and payouts, for a long time, even after the sin is forgiven in the confession. If I cheat on an exam paper then I will fear being caught out in the next course I take. If I neglect my kids, then I won’t be close to them as they get older,… etc.

I sometimes ask God that I be relieved of the natural consequences of my wrongdoing, but I also accept that I probably won’t be, and accept this a penance.

However, I don’t fear that God will send me extra punishment. The natural consequences are enough for sin which has been pardoned.

“as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.” [Psalm 102:12]
 
I suggest making an appointment with a priest and telling him exactly what you wrote in your post. You don’t have to go into your sins, just that you feel you aren’t forgiven. I am sure the priest will be able to talk it out with you.
 
Thank You… The more I read and absorb the promises of the Divine Mercy revelations, the more peaceful I feel…

Edmundus1581 you are right… I do fear the “natural consequences” (justice) greatly… would there anyway to talk God out of the natural consquences by invoking Divine Mercy?? or must they always happen as far as repercussions / penance are concerned?? Does anybody have the same stories?

A priest (I think) once told me… sin is like a big nail. Although the damage has been forgiven, the hole is still there… Can God, through his unfathomable, infinite mercy… just cancel everything out? Bearing in mind Psalm 51, “blotting out” my sins.I know its not for me to ask…
 
Hi,

That’s great that you’ve turned a corner and left this old life behind you. I had a similar experience when I was in my early 20’s but it didn’t leave me with guilt feelings after.

I suppose it’s good that you don’t forget what you left behind, and not stop regretting it, since those experiences will serve as reminders to you for the rest of your life of what can go wrong when you aren’t living your life for God.

Did you come back to God just out of fear of punishment? Or was there more to it? Fear of punishment is enough to have your sins forgiven but there is much more to knowing God. Have you given your life completely to God? Maybe going on a retreat would help you with this.
 
Lilsheep88 said:
Edmundus1581 you are right… I do fear the “natural consequences” (justice) greatly… would there anyway to talk God out of the natural consquences by invoking Divine Mercy?? or must they always happen as far as repercussions / penance are concerned?? Does anybody have the same stories?
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I remember that a few months ago we prayed, in “Prayer Intentions”, for you to released from the consequences. I joined in that prayer, and said it for myself also. I think that it’s time to just leave it with God. Please stop fearing so much. Just be patient and be brave and responsible when and if you must give account for an action. I don’t know what you are fearing here, but, for the sake of discussion, let’s say it is a sexually transmitted disease. If that were the case, then go to a doctor for tests, and wait for the results. Then, if the results are positive, start a treatment program. Just cross each bridge as it comes.

Most of all, be thankful that God has forgiven you and absolved you of your sin. Whatever consequences happen in this life, they are very small compared with the great punishment that was lifted with a just a few minutes in the confessional. There, in the confessional, you were not only relieved of punishment, but were restored to friendship with God! How great is that blessing!
A priest (I think) once told me… sin is like a big nail. Although the damage has been forgiven, the hole is still there… Can God, through his unfathomable, infinite mercy… just cancel everything out? Bearing in mind Psalm 51, “blotting out” my sins.I know its not for me to ask…
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I like that! Another good anology I have heard is of opening pillow case of down feathers, and letting them go in the wind. Our sins are like that - they have been loosed to wind, to rest where they will. We can’t regather them.

Please, LilSheep, stop fearing so much! Instead of saying another Divine Mercy chaplet, just look at the image and dwell on the words “Jesus, I trust in you!”.

And, you are certainly not alone! We all live with the consequences of our sins, and even our innocent mistakes, sometimes for many years, even a lifetime.

Wishing you a cheerful and blessed 2012,

Edmundus
 
Edmundus, those are one of the factors but there are greater things that are of concern to me… such as the stigma, the emotional toll that it has taken on me. Its just the guilt… that that I, going to those places of evil, will never be the same again… I have taken the defilement of my purity to a whole new level… The past is not something I would proudly and openly talk about, even if God wanted me to share my experiences with others “for his glory”… In short, its the stigma of being there and doing that that kills me… Looking back, this was also the greatest sign of disrespect a man could ever give to God.

And as far as my relationshiop is concerned… itll never be the same. My gf said that she respected me for my honesty, but I know she doesnt look at me the same way anymore. The scar will always be there and I will always regret it.
 
When I made my revert confession to my priest, he told me that I needed to know that God forgave me of my sin (s)(s)(s) and that I needed to do so as well.

He explained that it was a sin against hope to believe that God hadn’t forgiven me.

I realize that I’ll need to experience the full repair of the consequences created by my sins in purgatory.

And, I’m at peace with that.
 
Lilsheep88 said:
Edmundus, those are one of the factors but there are greater things that are of concern to me… such as the stigma, the emotional toll that it has taken on me. Its just the guilt… that that I, going to those places of evil, will never be the same again… I have taken the defilement of my purity to a whole new level… The past is not something I would proudly and openly talk about, even if God wanted me to share my experiences with others “for his glory”… **In short, its the stigma of being there and doing that that kills me… **Looking back, this was also the greatest sign of disrespect a man could ever give to God.

And as far as my relationshiop is concerned… itll never be the same. My gf said that she respected me for my honesty, but I know she doesnt look at me the same way anymore. The scar will always be there and I will always regret it.
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Hello again, LilSheep. Thanks for responding to us. It’s nice to know that our advice is not disappearing into the ether. 🙂
In short, its the stigma of being there and doing that that kills me…
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It doesn’t matter what it is - it might be stigma, or illness, or financial repercussions, or lost opportunities, or injury to someone else. We all have these problems, and have to just let go of the anxiety, and deal with them when, and if, they come up. Absolution never gives us a “clean slate” to start again, in this life. What it does give us is a “clean slate” with God as our friend.

I’ll tell you of a memory which haunts me. I was a tutor at a university 20 years ago. I was marking a paper by a struggling student who had little success, but worked hard. In marking the paper I took off two marks (out of ten) for a silly reason, driven by my own pride. I can still see the sadness on his face when he got that paper back. I’ll never know how much damage my action caused in the long run. I can never undo what I did. Whenever this incident comes to mind, I just say a prayer for that man.

Best wishes with it all, and thanks for listening.
 
Thank you Edmundus, for your posting contributions. I will really take your advice to heart… God bless and love you my friend.
 
LIlsheep, I think I know how you may feel. A few years ago, I came back into the church after being away for a long, long time. Even after going to confession several times, I still felt awful about my past sins and the guilt really bothered me a lot. I got some great advice from a priest, and it helps me to this day, when I’m feeling low about myself and my sinful past. His advice was to focus on the person that God is turning you into, not who you were in the past. In other words, look forward, not back. Every time you are tempted to feel a lot of guilt over the past, just thank God for his mercy and forgiveness, and focus on who you are now and thank him for your ongoing conversion. Another resource for you to check out is Scrupulous Anonymous, linked below.

mission.liguori.org/newsletters/scrupanon.htm

Bless you, you are in my prayers.
 
mommyof4 said:
LIlsheep, I think I know how you may feel. A few years ago, I came back into the church after being away for a long, long time. Even after going to confession several times, I still felt awful about my past sins and the guilt really bothered me a lot. I got some great advice from a priest, and it helps me to this day, when I’m feeling low about myself and my sinful past. His advice was to focus on the person that God is turning you into, not who you were in the past. In other words, look forward, not back. Every time you are tempted to feel a lot of guilt over the past, just thank God for his mercy and forgiveness, and focus on who you are now and thank him for your ongoing conversion. Another resource for you to check out is Scrupulous Anonymous, linked below.

mission.liguori.org/newsletters/scrupanon.htm

Bless you, you are in my prayers.
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Thank You Mommyof4… I do exhibit signs of OCD, hopefully I dont have it though. May God Bless and Love your family abundantly.
K
 
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