Confession question

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creole54

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I have a kind of embarrassing question about going to confession. I recently returned to the Catholic church after a 40 year absence and I cannot remember the act of contrition. I’ve tried to memorize it, but I get so nervous during confession, every clear thought flees out of my head.

This past weekend I went to confession at a church I was visiting (I was on vacation) and after I confessed my sins the (wonderfully, kind young priest) spent several minutes talking about my problem, offered clarity and suggestions and said, “Now, if you’ll say an act of contrition I’ll absolve you of your sins.” I was blank-headed and I just blurted “I don’t know how”. He smiled and said “Well, bow your head and I’ll give you absolution.”

I was grateful that he didn’t get mad or make me feel like an idiot, but I’d love for this to never happen again. Is the act of contrition required for absolution? Is there a short version that I could try to memorize and hopefully not forget? Does this happen to anyone else?
 
creole54 said:
I have a kind of embarrassing question about going to confession. I recently returned to the Catholic church after a 40 year absence and I cannot remember the act of contrition. I’ve tried to memorize it, but I get so nervous during confession, every clear thought flees out of my head.

This past weekend I went to confession at a church I was visiting (I was on vacation) and after I confessed my sins the (wonderfully, kind young priest) spent several minutes talking about my problem, offered clarity and suggestions and said, “Now, if you’ll say an act of contrition I’ll absolve you of your sins.” I was blank-headed and I just blurted “I don’t know how”. He smiled and said “Well, bow your head and I’ll give you absolution.”

I was grateful that he didn’t get mad or make me feel like an idiot, but I’d love for this to never happen again. Is the act of contrition required for absolution? Is there a short version that I could try to memorize and hopefully not forget? Does this happen to anyone else?
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I think it depends on the priest, but I converted as an adult and didn’t even know the A.of C for awhile. My priest and RCIA teachers told me the idea is to be contrite - to apologize sincerely for our sins. I can’t believe God would care if you don’t know it by heart - it’s what is in your heart that matters.

If you are into technology, you can download it on your smartphone. I have an app called Iconfess and i can literally keep track of my sins so I don’t forget them when I go to confession.

Having said all this, I love saying the Act of Contrition and it’s the first thing I recite in my nightly prayers.
 
The act of contrition isn’t 100% necessary for absolution and the priest will not always ask for it. If he does ask, there is often a card with a version (or sometimes more than one version) printed on it that you can read off. If there is no card, ask the priest to talk you through it in a repeat-after-me manner. There’s no need to be embarrassed about not knowing the word.
Here’s an idea: go to confession often and get lots of practice saying the act of contrition. 👍
 
Happens all the time. I bring a card, but it’s dark in there. 🙂

So I practiced to get the Act of Contrition by heart again, but it was kinda hard because the version we used in school was a “transitional” version, neither the old version or the new. I ended up looking through about ten different versions on the Internet until I found one that looked like what we used to use.

But if you can’t remember, you can always wing it! Don’t worry, Father hears that stuff all the time!
 
There are several versions. If you pray it as a bedtime prayer at the conclusion of your day you’ll have one of them memorized in no time.
Otherwise, use an index card from your wallet. We have it laminated with large print in our confessionals. And they are not dark. They are lighted, Anon or face-to-face. Whatever the penitent prefers.
No worries. Happens all the time.
Welcome home!
 
I recommend buying the Book of Catholic prayers; it contains many often used Catholic prayers including the Act of Contrition. I tend to carry this book with me just about everywhere as I meet people and end up praying with/for them. It almost has a prayer for every occasion and has “saved” me many times when people I know press me into prayer service. 🙂

BTW don’t worry about not remembering or knowing every prayer. God hears our prayer while still in our heart so it’s all good! 👍
 
If it is too dark for the card, then bring something in with you that you can read in low light. Our reconciliation room has it posted on the wall, in very large type; we are grateful for this!
 
pianistclare said:
There are several versions. If you pray it as a bedtime prayer at the conclusion of your day you’ll have one of them memorized in no time.
Otherwise, use an index card from your wallet. We have it laminated with large print in our confessionals. And they are not dark. They are lighted, Anon or face-to-face. Whatever the penitent prefers.
No worries. Happens all the time.
Welcome home!
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This is exactly how I learned it - as part of my night-time prayer ritual!😃
 
creole54 said:
I have a kind of embarrassing question about going to confession. I recently returned to the Catholic church after a 40 year absence and I cannot remember the act of contrition. I’ve tried to memorize it, but I get so nervous during confession, every clear thought flees out of my head.

This past weekend I went to confession at a church I was visiting (I was on vacation) and after I confessed my sins the (wonderfully, kind young priest) spent several minutes talking about my problem, offered clarity and suggestions and said, “Now, if you’ll say an act of contrition I’ll absolve you of your sins.” I was blank-headed and I just blurted “I don’t know how”. He smiled and said “Well, bow your head and I’ll give you absolution.”

I was grateful that he didn’t get mad or make me feel like an idiot, but I’d love for this to never happen again. Is the act of contrition required for absolution? Is there a short version that I could try to memorize and hopefully not forget? Does this happen to anyone else?
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I usually do not participate in threads about individual confessions.

After 40 years absence, there is much rejoicing in heaven that you’ve come back. Please read Luke 15. usccb.org/bible/luke/15

As far as I’m concerned (and probably that priest) your act of contrition was “bow your head.”
 
Welcome home! This is great news. 👍

Here is an act of contrition you could write down and recite after Confession:

“O my God, I am heartily sorry for having offended You, and I detest all my sins because of Your just punishments, but most of all because You are my God, who are all-good and deserving of all my love. I firmly resolve, with the help of Your grace, to sin no more and to avoid the near occasion of sin.”
 
The priest is required to ascertain the penitent’s sorrow for sin before granting absolution, but there is no requirement that this be ascertained through recitation of a formulaic act of contrition. That said, such “acts” are a standard part of confession because the rote prayers are designed to express precisely the things the priest would otherwise need to tease out in the course of the conversation, both the penitent’s sorrow for the sin itself and his intention “to sin no more and to avoid the near occasion of sin” or, more exhaustively, “to confess my sins, to do penance, and to amend my life.” If these intentions seem sufficiently clear, no rote prayer is required. In fact, an explicit act of contrition is sufficiently dispensable that it was often customary to ask the penitent to recite an act of contrition but then for the priest to quietly begin the formula of absolution at the same time - often finishing the forgiveness before the penitent finished expressing repentance!
 
Catholic1954 said:
If it is too dark for the card, then bring something in with you that you can read in low light. Our reconciliation room has it posted on the wall, in very large type; we are grateful for this!
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Our confessionals are no longer dark because windows have been installed in all doors because of the Church’s response to the sexual abuse problems. We also have a “cheat sheet” posted with the Confession script. There are smartphone apps out there to help with Confession too.
 
I’m thinking this young priest will have a copy of acts of contrition in about 20 pt boldface font in his confessionals after this. Live and learn.

Contrition is necessary. A particular verbal formula for expressing it is not. If the priest was satisfied that you expressed your contrition as well as you could, given the circumstances, then it was proper for him to absolve you.
 
  1. As some have suggested, you could bring a card with a text you like, or memorize one of the forms. There are several given in the Ritual for Reconciliation. The briefest I recall is simply “O God, have mercy on me, a sinner.”
  2. You can use your own words to express your sorrow for your sins and repentance.
  3. Some priests or parishes have printed copies available in the confessional for those who are unsure of the text.
 
EasterJoy said:
I’m thinking this young priest will have a copy of acts of contrition in about 20 pt boldface font in his confessionals after this. Live and learn.

…
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That’s good 😃

I have one in my confessionals. Not 20 point font, but I think it’s 18.

I say “it’s in front of you.”

“where?”

“right in front of you”

“I don’t see it”

“it’s on the card just above the screen” (at eye-level for most adults)

(I can hear them putting their hands all over the walls and even the floor)

“right in front of your eyes”

“there’s nothing here”

“the white paper with black letters on it”

“I don’t see anything here except for some paper”

“yes, that’s the Act of Contrition” (mentally, I add “with the words “ACT OF CONTRITION” in 24 point font at the top of the card” as I roll my eyes)

“ohhh… That’s what that is!”

“do you see it now?”

“yes! I couldn’t find it”

“Don’t worry about it, no one else can find it either…”

I have actually had people REMOVE the Act of Contrition from its place on the wall and literally look on the wall behind it to find the Act of Contrition. I can hear it happening, and when it does, I have to go over and put it back into its proper place. I kid you not, they actually remove it and look on the wall behind it.
 
FrDavid96 said:
That’s good 😃

I have one in my confessionals. Not 20 point font, but I think it’s 18.

I say “it’s in front of you.”

“where?”

“right in front of you”

“I don’t see it”

“it’s on the card just above the screen” (at eye-level for most adults)

(I can hear them putting their hands all over the walls and even the floor)

“right in front of your eyes”

“there’s nothing here”

“the white paper with black letters on it”

“I don’t see anything here except for some paper”

“yes, that’s the Act of Contrition” (mentally, I add “with the words “ACT OF CONTRITION” in 24 point font at the top of the card” as I roll my eyes)

“ohhh… That’s what that is!”

“do you see it now?”

“yes! I couldn’t find it”

“Don’t worry about it, no one else can find it either…”

I have actually had people REMOVE the Act of Contrition from its place on the wall and literally look on the wall behind it to find the Act of Contrition. I can hear it happening, and when it does, I have to go over and put it back into its proper place. I kid you not, they actually remove it and look on the wall behind it.
Click to expand...
That is SO funny! Thanks for lightening up this thread! :rotfl:
 
FrDavid96 said:
That’s good 😃

I have one in my confessionals. Not 20 point font, but I think it’s 18.

I say “it’s in front of you.”

“where?”

“right in front of you”

“I don’t see it”

“it’s on the card just above the screen” (at eye-level for most adults)

(I can hear them putting their hands all over the walls and even the floor)

“right in front of your eyes”

“there’s nothing here”

“the white paper with black letters on it”

“I don’t see anything here except for some paper”

“yes, that’s the Act of Contrition” (mentally, I add “with the words “ACT OF CONTRITION” in 24 point font at the top of the card” as I roll my eyes)

“ohhh… That’s what that is!”

“do you see it now?”

“yes! I couldn’t find it”

“Don’t worry about it, no one else can find it either…”

I have actually had people REMOVE the Act of Contrition from its place on the wall and literally look on the wall behind it to find the Act of Contrition. I can hear it happening, and when it does, I have to go over and put it back into its proper place. I kid you not, they actually remove it and look on the wall behind it.
Click to expand...
Thanks, as 808Catholic said, for lightening up the thread! :rotfl:

There is no one so blind as someone who can see, but does not see.

I too have to replace my slip with the Act of Contrition every few months.
 
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