Confession/Sin Issues

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nsper7

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So I went to Confession today. One of the things I confessed was possible sloth since I am not working currently and have pretty much given up on finding a job in the short term (in Sept/Oct, I plan on heading to Los Angeles and then Latin America as part of a long-term missionary work with the Comboni Missionaries). I think I told the Priest that I have had no luck finding work and that I have pretty muchg given up in the short-term, although I will be moving ahead with the Combonis. Shortly after Confession, I worried that I had somehow lied/misrepresented to the Priest, although I am not honestly sure how I did so, but I worried about it anyway.

Then, at services (the Good Friday celebration), I started to feel angry and angry/hateful thoughts. For example, during the Gospel reading, an angry/hateful thought toward Jesus crossed my mind and it was like I got irritated at His words to the High Priest and then Pilate and it was like it crossed my mind that I wanted Him to suffer. It really disturbed me. Then, because of these issues (i.e. Scrupulosity and bad thoughts), I started to get angry and more angry and hateful, possibly even resentful, thoughts crossed my mind towards God and in general.
 
And, oh yeah, during the Veneration of the Cross (it was extremely long…one cross, the entire parish) and I got impatient. Anyway, suddenly angry/hateful thoughts crossed my mind about the Cross. Again, it disturbed me. And again, there was that baby crying sometimes and I felt angry/hateful thoughts.
 
nsper7 said:
So I went to Confession today. One of the things I confessed was possible sloth since I am not working currently and have pretty much given up on finding a job in the short term (in Sept/Oct, I plan on heading to Los Angeles and then Latin America as part of a long-term missionary work with the Comboni Missionaries). I think I told the Priest that I have had no luck finding work and that I have pretty muchg given up in the short-term, although I will be moving ahead with the Combonis. Shortly after Confession, I worried that I had somehow lied/misrepresented to the Priest, although I am not honestly sure how I did so, but I worried about it anyway.

Then, at services (the Good Friday celebration), I started to feel angry and angry/hateful thoughts. For example, during the Gospel reading, an angry/hateful thought toward Jesus crossed my mind and it was like I got irritated at His words to the High Priest and then Pilate and it was like it crossed my mind that I wanted Him to suffer. It really disturbed me. Then, because of these issues (i.e. Scrupulosity and bad thoughts), I started to get angry and more angry and hateful, possibly even resentful, thoughts crossed my mind towards God and in general.
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***Pray for God’s help and comfort at times like that.

The Devil may be tempting you to turn away from God and the Church.***
 
nsper7 said:
And, oh yeah, during the Veneration of the Cross (it was extremely long…one cross, the entire parish) and I got impatient. Anyway, suddenly angry/hateful thoughts crossed my mind about the Cross. Again, it disturbed me. And again, there was that baby crying sometimes and I felt angry/hateful thoughts.
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Heehee, a reason to get there early and sit in front! 😉
 
nsper, I would like to share this with you:

Original sin has caused all of us to inherit a wounded nature that is predisposed to sin. We are sinful creatures, and we are helpless without the grace of Christ within our lives. Christ promised to forgive the man who turns to him with a contrite heart. The Saviour has chosen to dispense his mercy through the Sacrament of Confession. When you confess with a contrite heart vowing to never sin again, Christ through his servant the priest, forgives you of every sin you have committed. You are made clean and spotless before the Lord. When you leave the confessional, have faith that Christ has forgiven you.

After confession, you are in a state of Grace and are fully reconciled to the Lord. Despite this, you still have an inclination towards sin. You will always have sinful desires and sinful thoughts. This is an unfortunate consequence of Original Sin. However, you must fight against external temptations and the innate impulse to sin. When you have doubts about what you said in the confessional, immediately turn your mind to Christ and ask for his mercy. When a sinful thought passes through your mind, immediately replace it with a prayer or a meditation on Christ. Fight the good fight! You will always have sinful thoughts. They key is not to deliberately encourage them. You must fight against the temptations of the Evil One and against your own wounded nature. You are not culpable for the consequences of Original Sin or for the temptations you receive. You are only responsible for the way you react to temptation and your own evil desires of the flesh.

These are my own personal thoughts. I hope my words help. If they don’t just ignore them. I’ll remember you in my prayers this evening.
 
My dear friend

Welcome to the church in advance. Your experiencing imperfections which mean nothing if you don’t indulge these thoughts. The devil may be suggesting these things too. Just reject them and you can be sure God will be even more pleased with you than if you never had these trials.🙂
 
It still doesn’t address my issue of the overactive imagination (forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=317141). My quasi-Confessor told me, I think, that I should assume even my overactive imagination (i.e. envisioning myself as being some powerful leader, even if evil or something) and thoughts in general are not (mortal) sins unless I am intending on acting them out (i.e. if I am envisioning myself as an evil leader and then planning on how I can attain such power or something), but then I remember reading in the Catholic Encyclopedia about “delectatio morosa”.

Also, yesterday, the Priest pretty much refused to hear my Confession since I had been the day before (he gave me a blessing, not Absolution). That worried me a little, esp. since I was receiving Communion.
 
nsper7, I think you need to take a step back here. First and foremost, you are a human being, and as such, you and all of us are sinners. When I sin, I say to God that I’m sorry and I make a good Act of Contrition. Sometimes I do that on the spot and other times, I do a short examination of conscience at the end of the day and make a good Act of Contrition then.

Let’s switch to the Sacrament of Confession. You must confess all mortal sins. While encouraged, the confession of venial sins is optional. My Act of Contrition above would have been sufficient to have my venial sins forgiven even outside of the sacrament.

We also have to remember what a mortal sin is. A mortal sin is 1) a sin of grave matter (i.e. it’s got to be a serious sin), 2) it must be committed with full knowledge of the sinner and 3) it must be committed with deliberate consent of the sinner.

While only you can know the answer to this, my sense is that you did not go into confession and tell the priest that you were being slothy as an intentional lie. That is not a mortal sin in my opinion.

As for your anger at church, we all have bad days. Some anger is justified (Jesus got angry at the merchants in the temple area) and that is not sinful. Other times the anger is not justified and is sinful. My personal opinion is that it takes more then an angry thought to make something a mortal sin.

So take a step back and give yourself a break. You are a sinner as are we all, but not all your sins are mortal sins. Additionally, pray to God that the Holy Spirit can help you avoid sin and when you do sin that you understand the seriousness (or lack thereof) of the sin. Also, make an appointment with your priest and ask him to help you understand the difference. He is there to lead his flock and he can help and teach you.

God bless and I will pray for you as well.
 
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