Confession

[allegretto]

Hello,

I am considering having the sacrament of Reconciliation sometime soon, even though I haven’t been in a LONG time and I have only recently decided I am interested in becoming involved with Catholicism again (I was baptized and confirmed as a younger person). My re-exploration of the faith has met with many stumbling blocks, many people who say that because I disagree with certain social teachings or other issues (I’m not talking about significant dogma, but other, more political issues) I cannot be Catholic or take Communion. I find this extremely frustrating, hurtful, and difficult. Why would Christ be calling me back if so many people seem to want to label me a “cafeteria Catholic” and tell me I’m not good enough? Anyway, I feel called to go to Reconciliation, but I will not ask forgiveness for certain things that I do not believe to sinful and for which I do not intend to stop doing-- premarital sex in a committed relationship of several years duration, not attending mass every Sunday, voting Democrat, etc. Will a priest refuse to absolve me for any of my sins and send me away with harsh words like everyone else? I am just so sick of feeling thwarted by Catholic people, when I just want to share in the love of Jesus and the Catholic faith. I think myself a fairly good person and all I want is to find a closer connection to the Catholic faith. Is Reconciliation going to be an exercise in futility for me?

Please, don’t judge. For once.

 

[Methodi]

Hello,

I am considering having the sacrament of Reconciliation sometime soon, even though I haven’t been in a LONG time and I have only recently decided I am interested in becoming involved with Catholicism again (I was baptized and confirmed as a younger person). My re-exploration of the faith has met with many stumbling blocks, many people who say that because I disagree with certain social teachings or other issues (I’m not talking about significant dogma, but other, more political issues) I cannot be Catholic or take Communion. I find this extremely frustrating, hurtful, and difficult. Why would Christ be calling me back if so many people seem to want to label me a “cafeteria Catholic” and tell me I’m not good enough? Anyway, I feel called to go to Reconciliation, but I will not ask forgiveness for certain things that I do not believe to sinful and for which I do not intend to stop doing-- premarital sex in a committed relationship of several years duration, not attending mass every Sunday, voting Democrat, etc. Will a priest refuse to absolve me for any of my sins and send me away with harsh words like everyone else? I am just so sick of feeling thwarted by Catholic people, when I just want to share in the love of Jesus and the Catholic faith. I think myself a fairly good person and all I want is to find a closer connection to the Catholic faith. Is Reconciliation going to be an exercise in futility for me?

Please, don’t judge. For once.

Premarital sex is a no, no, in the Catholic, I mean a lot are doing it But it is a Mortal sin, & Must be confessed, & You will have to change your lifestyle. There are things that I dont think are a sin either, but the Catholic Church tells me they are, so If i commit one I must go to confession to be reconciled with God,It may be an excercise of futility if u dont change your lifestyle

 

[Holland]

I would say from your post that you aren’t ready yet. This is from someone who was away from the Church for 25 years. When I finally decided to to come back to the Catholic Church it took me about 5 years to do it. I kept going over and over all things I thought I had hangups about. I didn’t enter the Catholic Church unttil I could embrace it fully. This isn’t about judging you or your actions. You have to ask yourself why you don’t want to be married or why you don’t want to go to Mass every Sunday. These are important things that you have to explore before you go any further and only you know the answer to the above questions. If you don’t settle these things now it will be very hard on you later. One thing that would be helpful to you is to pray The Rosary daily if you can. It is the one thing that kept me going during those 5 years. Also, start going to Mass when you can. Good Luck. May the Peace and Joy of Christmas be with you always!

 

[Joe_Kelley]

I explain to the RCIA that one does not become Catholic because one agrees with the teachings of the Church. One becomes Catholic only if one believes that the Church is the source for truth.

Everyone has a source for truth; a source that one believes has the final answer on questions. There are three common sources: God, human experts, self. Many will say they go to God but really depend on their interpretation of God, or what the theological experts teach. The only source I know that God has guaranteed to speak for Him is the Catholic Church.

 

[allegretto]

“Everyone has a source for truth…Many will say they go to God but really depend on their interpretation of God, or what the theological experts teach. The only source I know that God has guaranteed to speak for Him is the Catholic Church.”

I don’t know how one could even attempt to know God but through one’s own interpretation-- and my interpretation fits largely into the Catholic faith; however, my own life experiences (life given by God?) do not always match what the “theological experts teach”, particularly as regards being eternally damned for physically expressing my love with another adult who shares it, or not feeling guilty when I would rather take a walk or play my cello on a sunny Sunday morning than spend another hour hearing how I am damned to hell.

“There are things that I dont think are a sin either, but the Catholic Church tells me they are, so If i commit one I must go to confession to be reconciled with God”

I have been going to Mass more recently, and I have been reading about many of the more dubious teachings of the Church to try to understand the reasons why they were established as they were-- but faith relies on the belief that what you have faith in is the one truth, and I could no more believe that in certain aspects of my life I am harming myself or others than I could fly to the moon. Sins I have plenty, which is why I seek the forgiveness of the Lord (and indeed have such respect for the sacrament that I want to seek it formally that way), but it makes me crazy that when I do attempt to reconcile myself with God and with the faith, that I am instantly deemed not “good” and virtuous enough to share God’s love.

 

[acadian]

I have been in your shoes, so I am not without empathy.

Eventually, though, I had to accept that even though I did not agree with everything that perhaps I was wrong and the church was right. This was not an overnight decision. I realized that God is God, and I am not. When Jesus left this earth, He left the church to act as the head of his body. He didn’t leave me in charge. There is a certain amount of humility and surrender required.

Even though you may not believe that sex outside of marriage is wrong, God says it is. And God gets to make the rules, which is only right since He suffered, bled, and died for us. There was really nothing inherently wrong with Eve taking a bite of that apple in the garden except that God said “Don’t do it.”

Keep up the struggle. God can not penetrate a hard heart or a closed mind - he will not violate your free will, but if you give him just a little bit of an opening, he can do wonderous things in your life.

You go to Reconciliation to become a new person. That means you give ALL your sins to God, not just the ones you are ready to let go of. To go and make a “selective confession” (which I have done), makes a mockery of the sacrament, and does nothing but add another sin to the heap. Reconciliation is about restoring our relationship with God, and rising from the death of sin. You can’t come half-way back to life or be partly on good terms with God. He purchased us at a price, and he is worthy of everything we have - including all of our sins.

Something you might find of interest is the Confession CD by Fr. Larry Richards/Roberts???. It is available at www.catholicity.com for $1 or so. Might be a great investment.

 

[Letchitsa1]

My approach is pretty simple: honesty is always the best policy. If you feel called to go to confession, you should go. Tell the priest everything up front - all your sins, and also that you are struggling with Church teachings on pre-marital sex and Sunday mass attendance and, to the best of your ability, why you are struggling with them. We are all at different points on our faith journey at different times in our lives. A good confessor will be able to guide you in the way that you should go. Basically - give the Holy Spirit a chance to work in your life and see what happens. You may be pleasantly surprised.

FWIW - it is not a sin to vote for a Democrat, regardless of what any number of Republicans will tell you, any more than it is a sin to vote for a Republican.

 

[Sir_Knight]

FWIW - it is not a sin to vote for a Democrat, regardless of what any number of Republicans will tell you, any more than it is a sin to vote for a Republican.

It IS a sin to not oppose abortion. If voting for a Democrat that supports abortion, then one is ALSO guilty of the sin of abortion. If not voting for a Republican results in a pro-abortion Democrat getting elected, then that is also a sin.

We’ve been through this subject round and round before and immediately after the elections and numerous reference sources have been provided to support this position.

 

[dg5887]

It is not for us to judge. So understand we are not judging you. Nor or we “Catholic people” thrawting you, you are doing it to yourself. We don’t make the rules, God does. We just state them. It seems that you are mad at us because you won’t accept the Church’s teaching and we are calling you on it. It surely isn’t our fault for supporting our faith. Some things are just right and some things are wrong. If I see someone commiting murder and call him a murderer, am I judging him or pointing out a fact? You state you do not believe pre-marital sex is wrong, do you claim that the Bible is wrong? On what authority can you decide what God says is right and what God says is wrong? The key sentace in your post is “…but I will not ask forgiveness for certain things that I do not believe to sinful and for which I do not intend to stop doing…”. And the key word in that sentance is “I”. It is not about what YOU believe is a sin. If you are going to ask God for forgiveness in the Church He started then you need to be sorry for what He says, through the Church, is wrong. I do believe with all my heart that God is calling you back. He is always calling to all His people to be drawn closer to himself. But you can’t ask for forgiveness and not be sorry.