Confirmation

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watertower

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My apologies up front if this has already been asked… but I’m wondering what folks think is an appropriate age for confirmation. The reason I’m asking is they announced they will be doing confirmation for 4th and 5th graders, and I have a 4th grader. I just feel that is too young. I’d really prefer my daughter wait until at least 5th grade. I want it to be more meaningful and memorable for her. But am I off base? If I wait, then I don’t think the next chance will be until 6th grade, and then she’d be left out from all her friends, plus she’d be getting confirmed with those younger… I’m not sure what to do, and am just looking for any experiences, advice, etc. Thank-you.
 
I think that 8th grade is a much more appropriate age to get confirmed. I think that in 4th and 5th grade, you are not prepared to make adult decisions like being confirmed. When I was confirmed, it was an intense program, and everyone knew what they were undertaking. I would have a conversation sharing your concerns with your priest.

If that doesn’t work, I would talk to your daughters friend’s moms and see what they think. Maybe your daughter could get confirmed later, but with her friends!

Hope this helps! 🙂
 
I was in high school when I was confirmed–either junior or senior year, I forget which. I remember that I had to beg to choose a confirmation saint, and I was the only person to have one in our class. I also remember that the married couple that ran our confirmation group was a laicized priest and a former nun. :bigyikes:

I don’t know what the “appropiate age” for confirmation is/should be. In retrospect, I don’t think I was ready for it–I should have known a lot more about my faith before getting confirmed. Of course, that may be from poor catechism in the confirmation class. 😃 Personally, 4th grade seems awfully young, but if the kids fully understand what they are getting confirmed in, it’s an appropiate age.
 
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watertower:
My apologies up front if this has already been asked… but I’m wondering what folks think is an appropriate age for confirmation. The reason I’m asking is they announced they will be doing confirmation for 4th and 5th graders, and I have a 4th grader. I just feel that is too young. I’d really prefer my daughter wait until at least 5th grade. I want it to be more meaningful and memorable for her. But am I off base? If I wait, then I don’t think the next chance will be until 6th grade, and then she’d be left out from all her friends, plus she’d be getting confirmed with those younger… I’m not sure what to do, and am just looking for any experiences, advice, etc. Thank-you.
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I completely agree with you. In confirmation we’re asking for and receiving the grace necessary to live the Christian life as an adult. How can a 4th grader to that? I was confirmed at 16 and still didn’t really know what the heck was happening. Why are they pushing this so young??

In Christ,
Nancy 🙂
 
Frankly, the Church doesn’t know what the appropriate age is. In the Eastern Catholic Churches infants are baptized, chrismated (confirmed) and eucharized (first communion) all at the same time. In the RCIA children over the age of seven also receive all three sacraments at once.

The problem we in the Latin Church have is thinking of confirmation as a rite of passage, a sort of Catholic Bar Mitzva. Confirmation is simply the completion of Baptism. When we get the theology right, the age no longer really matters.

Deacon Ed
 
Deacon Ed:
The problem we in the Latin Church have is thinking of confirmation as a rite of passage, a sort of Catholic Bar Mitzva. Confirmation is simply the completion of Baptism. When we get the theology right, the age no longer really matters.

Deacon Ed
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Our liturgical coordinator calls Confirmation: The Sacrament in search of a theology.
 
This is from Canon Law 891:

The sacrament of confirmation is to be conferred on the faithful at about the age of discretion, unless the Bishops’ Conference has decided on a different age, or there is a danger of death or, in the judgement of the minister, a grave reason suggests otherwise.
Traditionally the “age of discretion” is seven, and that is when first confession and first communion are generally conferred.

Over the years, and in various dioceses, confirmation has been conferred at varying ages. In my diocese (Detroit) it is usually done around 8th grade, although some wait until high school. I was confirmed in 5th grade, a year after my classmates (this was back in 1965).

You, as a parent, have the right to make a judgement call as to whether you feel your child is ready to be confirmed. This is your right as the primary catechist of your child.

'thann
 
Our diocese just began to require 2 years for Confirmation prep. Our son was looking forward to Confirmation this year (8th grade) - now, it will be next year (9th grade). While I understand that the final decision is up to the parents, I see this as a chance for all of us to practice submission to authority and go through the full 2 year prep.

4th grade seems very young…
 
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mercygate:
Our liturgical coordinator calls Confirmation: The Sacrament in search of a theology.
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And it is well called; I have seen 5 different theological views, all of which seem acceptable, and none alone complete.
 
Deacon Ed:
The problem we in the Latin Church have is thinking of confirmation as a rite of passage, a sort of Catholic Bar Mitzva. Confirmation is simply the completion of Baptism. When we get the theology right, the age no longer really matters. Deacon Ed
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The kids at our parish all believe they are ‘confirming their faith’. They’re making their own choice to be Catholic. Frankly, I think if 2nd graders can receive the Eucharist, something none of us can really understand, I don’t see why Confirmation is such a big mystery that they have to be in high school to understand and receive. —KCT
 
I sympathize with your situation. I am a cathecism teacher and taught preparation for confirmation last year. Our kids are confirmed in high school - 11th grade. I, myself, was confirmed in the 11th grade and that was many, many years ago!

Even while teaching the 11th graders last year, I felt that a great many were not ready then! As we got closer to the actual day of Confirmation, they began to see the seriousness of the decision they were about to make.

I personally feel that the kids need to be old enough to make a decision on their own as to whether they want to continue in their Catholic faith and promises made for them by their parents at Baptism. I don’t feel they should be forced or made to feel that it’s what they “should do” because their parents want them to or because everyone else is doing it.

I believe the kids at 7 or 8 years old are old enough to understand the basics of the Sacraments of Reconciliation and Eucharist but Confirmation is a strengthening and preparing the person to witness for Christ - it’s an “adult” decision. However, I am lucky that I’m in a diocese that believes this way, too.

Perhaps you could talk to your pastor or even make an appointment with your bishop to discuss your feelings. They would probably make you feel better about the decision to confirm at this age. If you are not satisfied with the reasoning, maybe you could hold your child until high school and enroll her in the RCIC or RCIA program to be confirmed - that could be a possible option.

I pray that you can work this out to your satisfaction.
 
So little children and teenagers can’t bne saints? I beg to differ. Have you guys forgotten about St.Maria Goretti or St.Philumena?
 
What is this “witness” stuff? Its vague and inexact. Confirmation makes you “a soldier of Christ”. Witness could mean jsut plain sight.
 
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DianJo:
I sympathize with your situation. I am a cathecism teacher and taught preparation for confirmation last year. Our kids are confirmed in high school - 11th grade. I, myself, was confirmed in the 11th grade and that was many, many years ago!

Even while teaching the 11th graders last year, I felt that a great many were not ready then! As we got closer to the actual day of Confirmation, they began to see the seriousness of the decision they were about to make.

I personally feel that the kids need to be old enough to make a decision on their own as to whether they want to continue in their Catholic faith and promises made for them by their parents at Baptism. I don’t feel they should be forced or made to feel that it’s what they “should do” because their parents want them to or because everyone else is doing it.

I believe the kids at 7 or 8 years old are old enough to understand the basics of the Sacraments of Reconciliation and Eucharist but Confirmation is a strengthening and preparing the person to witness for Christ - it’s an “adult” decision. However, I am lucky that I’m in a diocese that believes this way, too.

Perhaps you could talk to your pastor or even make an appointment with your bishop to discuss your feelings. They would probably make you feel better about the decision to confirm at this age. If you are not satisfied with the reasoning, maybe you could hold your child until high school and enroll her in the RCIC or RCIA program to be confirmed - that could be a possible option.

I pray that you can work this out to your satisfaction.
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Yeah but the problem with 17,18 year old confirmation is that some persons just do it becuase their parents want them to do it.
Also some could be confirmed atheists [or another one of those sects]. It is better to have Confirmation early before the children are innundiated with the world.
 
I was Confirmed many years ago in the 4th Grade. Seems young, but if you’re old enough to receive the Body of Christ in the 2nd grade, I don’t see why Confirmation can’t follow shortly.

In fact, I’m beginning to see merit in the Eastern way of doing it: Do all 3 Sacraments of Initiation together: Baptism, Confirmation, Eucharist. After that, concentrate on ongoing catechesis.
 
Confirmation rightly is the completion of Baptism, and this makes one a full member of the Church. Then one is permitted to receive the Eucharist (this is how the whole affair went in the Church from the beginning until recently). It seems that the practice of Confirmation after Communion is an abberation (wrt early Church practice). Even the Catechism assumes Confirmation prior to first Communion.

One thing that bothers me is the common rational for late Confirmation-that one is to decide at that point to be Catholic. I am very sorry to those who hold this view, or one similar to it, but this smacks of the rational that the Anabaptists use to delaying Baptism-save that they have not forgotten that it is Baptism that enrolls one into the Church.

With or without Confirmation, if one is baptized Catholic, that one is Catholic; and leaves the Church, the person has left the Church. Here it is that the person has or has not been sealed with the Holy Spirit, and had the person been sealed at an earlier age, before sin had taken root, the person in question would be more open to the Spirit, and would not have been as likely to leave the Church. At any rate, all too many leave the Church soon after the late Confirmation, and do not know any more about the Church than if they had not gone to all the classes (a different problem altogether). Sorry for the ramble.

In Christ,
Adam
 
The Latin Church as well practiced total initiation at the same time, for infants and adults alike. But this was at a time when the Bishop of the Diocese was the proper celebrant of Baptism. As that became less and less possible, Baptism was made proper to the pastors and Confirmation was retained at a saparate time, by the Bishop, so the local Bishop could still have some direct contact/influence/sacramentality with each member of his diocese. At the same time, First Holy COmmunion was delayed until the early teen years until recently, when Pope Pius X’s reforms brought it down to the Age of Reason. There was MUCH resistence and protest for this change by members of the hierarchy throughout the world.

The final question is a pastoral one. Where will it make the most efficacious difference? etc. etc. As one poster said, there are several distinct theorem on the matter, and they are all sensible and reasonable. That is because the question really is pastoral, not Sacramental.

Personally, I am of the ilk that would rather complete initiation (Baptism, Confirmation, Holy Eucharist) all take palce at the same time, regardless of the age of the Candidate.

When it comes to the mid-teen years for Confirmation, there are arguments for it and against it. For it, with which I agree, is that this is a good way to keep an influence on the youth of the Church at least until that time. (A good instructor will teach the candidates that Confirmation isn’t their ticket for a Church wedding since it isn’t required, nor is it the sign of the end of their church practice). ANother side to that coin, with which I also agree, is that delaying Confirmation until that time means that many don’t engage in the Sacrament and, therefore, go on to further life unconfirmed, lacking the special grace. I really haven’t met any pastoral ideology of Confirmation that I can’t argue both for and against. As that same poster said, “they are all incomplete.”
Seems ther eis no perfect time, but really no bad time, either. So, as a parish priest, I just follow Diocesan statutes as they happen to be at present.

Here, it is standard to be confirmed in 11th grade. However, I have had many parents who home school, or just take a particular interest in his or her particular child’s needs approach me for Confirmation at much younger ages. I have facilitated them to be confirmed by the bishop, who has never refused such a request for a younger person. Of course, our new bishop is too new to have tried in these circumstances yet, but I don’t imagine there would be a problem. After all, there is no dogma stating that Confirmation must be received in 11th grade or forget about it. 🙂

BNut just remember, Confirmation is not a theological mess at all. It’s rock solid. But it is definitely a pastoral mess.

– Fr. L.
 
I was confirmed in the 2nd grade. I must have been wise and/or holy enough at that age. :rolleyes:

The rationale for “earlier” Confirmation is that the Holy Spirit will guide the confirmandi in their studies.

One rationale for “later” Confirmation is that the confirmandi drop out of CCD once they have been Confirmed, so you want to keep them hooked into the program as long as possible. I’ve always thought that was a weak argument.

Another rationale for “later” Confirmation is to ‘prostantize’ it, to equate it with “choosing” Christ. This is also a theologically unsound position.
 
I have lived in this Texas town for 42 years. We have our own Catholic school K - 8th grade. Ever since I have lived here the kids who have attended our Catholic school are Confirmed in the third grade. The children are 8 or 9 years old. Personally I was confirmed at about age 32. Confirmation is a spiritual event. And as Deacon Ed explained: For Catholic kids in public schools confirmation is much later.

“The problem we in the Latin Church have is thinking of confirmation as a rite of passage, a sort of Catholic Bar Mitzva. Confirmation is simply the completion of Baptism. When we get the theology right, the age no longer really matters.”

Thanks Deacon Ed.👋
 
It can legitimately be called a Rite of Passage, since it is the final of the three “steps” to total initiation in the Church. An unconfirmed Catholic is not a fully initiated Catholic. Neither is an uneucharistized Catholic a fully initiated Catholic.
 
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