Confused about God's will

  • Thread starter Thread starter cmscms
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
C

cmscms

Guest
OK, I feel really embarrased to post the following but I need to be honest.

Very often, I feel like there is a little kid inside of me that is kicking and screaming ‘Please don’t make me do God’s will’. I would much rather try and do things my way. The main reason is because I want to have things I believe would make me happy. I can’t help but think that God’s will is for me to be unhappy. (writing it out makes it sound stupid and I am sure people reading this are probably rolling their eyes but I do need to be honest with my inner most thoughs)

For example, I would like to advance my career and I have the education to do so. Yet, I go on countless interviews and apply for countless jobs with no success. I think that on the one hand, God gave me talents to use and I should put them to use. Yet, I can’t help but think God wants me it a no fun job with not good money because He just doesn’t care to see me prosper.

It seems to me, I have 2 ways to look at it. 1-) there is something inately flawed in me so I can’t move up the latter. or 2-) God just doesn’t want me to prosper. Both options hurt.

Usually, when I pray for God’s will, I hear nothing in the sense that there is a ‘block’ that is preventing me from hearing Him. Well recently on a couple of occasions, it felt like there was a void. Like God did not have a will for me. And that is scary since (in my opinion), if you have finished doing God’s will, it means your time here on earth is almost over.

Yet, I also believe when your time on earth is almost over, there is also a sense of happiness that you will shortly see God. Since I am not overly happy, I think I will have more time on earth.

So basically, how does one submit to God’s will. Is it a Catholic view to see Him as the master and us as the servants (is there even a difference between a servant and a slave?)

So, prayers that God could help me follow his will would be appreciated. As well as people sharing how they feel about God’s will

Thanks

CM
 
“God sent his Son, born of a woman, born under the law,
to ransom those under the law, so that we might receive adoption.
As proof that you are children, God sent the spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying out, “Abba, Father!”
So you are no longer a slave but a child, and if a child then also an heir, through God.”
Galatians 4 verses 5-7

So no, you are not a slave but a child of God whom Jesus gave the right to call Father.
Remember that when Jesus was asked to teach His disciples how to pray, He taught them to pray, “Our Father”.

That you aren’t able to advance in your career or to fully use your abilities isn’t God’s doing. Many people are in similar and worse situations because of the financial situation of the time.
There is nothing flawed in these people, so much as the material reality in which they, and you, live
This is not God’s doing but to a large degree this economic misery is traceable to the greed and mismanagement of financiers.

I’m really sorry that you’re finding things so hard, CM.
It is discouraging,
as it is for so many,
including my own youngest son who is a skilled craftsman.
He was top of his university and his State for his craft,
but he has to give up his beautiful work because his spine is deteriorating steadily, and so he has to find different kind of work, so far, unsuccessfully…but it isn’t that God is holding him down, it is human situations. My husband is on disability, but that too isn’t God’s doing. It affected us greatly. We lost our home and are the economic and career failures of both our families. Yet my husband was very skilled and had a very high intelligence, though intellectually, less emotional intelligence…which is simply something that is also a challenge for a person to grow, which is fine.
But this isn’t God’s doing. He has illness as a fact of his life. The economic consequences followed.

I certainly don’t regard our situation as God’s holding us down or wishing us to be unhappy, and please dear soul, don’t think that way regarding yourself.
 
Hello!

Finding God’s will when you have so much going on in your life already can be very hard. Especially when it seems God isn’t answering your prayers. My advice would be to be patient and continue to pray. And make sure you are staying completely open to God’s will. I am only a teenager, and God has already shown me what He wants me to do. But I went through a little stage where I was praying without much vigor and I was trying to run my own life. And you know what God did? He stopped “talking” to me. Maybe that sounds weird, but in order to pursue what He wanted me to, I had to be open to Him in order to get inspiration. So make sure you are truly showing God you care what He wants and try very hard not to accidentally put up mental barriers. 🙂 I will pray for you tonight! Best of luck! 🙂
 
No, you’re don’t need to be embarrassed, CM.
It’s great that you’re being honest about your doubts and feelings.

As regards dying…it is God’s will that we love God above all and others as ourselves, in prayer and in practical charity.
This purpose permeates the gospel and the epistles, and Jesus words and life,
and in Matthew 25 verses 31-46 Jesus states this very emphatically as our purpose.

There is no end to that, no end or limit to prayer and acts of practical charity, even in the smallest ways, including a kind word or smile. As long as we live, this is the underlying vocation of each of us. It lasts as long as we live.

Feeling happy isn’t a condition for dying, it is a choice we make each day however hard our challenges, and however sweet some moments are,
happiness is the choice we make for ourselves in both miserable and joyful occurrences and situations.

My darling Dad is moving towards his death. If in his acts and attitudes, his words and smile, that man isn’t a saint, I don’t know who is. I frequently feel overwhelmed by his goodness. He is in such pain, but he is sweet and gentle with everyone. He’s a very intelligent and wise man, not at all fluffy-minded, so in that kindness and gentleness and wisdom and patience that he shows in all situations, the latest being a crack in his spine which also has extremely painful bone cancer…he is proof that goodness and happiness remains a choice though pain, as well as though good times. Throught suffering, loss of his busy lifestyle, lived in numerous services to others, his spirit, his choice for kindness and peace remains the same as when he was strong…he chose to be the person he is, a true gentleman, and true Christian, a true Catholic, and I believe a saint, whether things were hard or easy. He hasn’t changed through adversity, only become more beautifully himself. He lost his beloved first wife and his beloved second…and I could give a great list of his achievements,
but the one that counts is that in all the challenges of his life…and even amongst his nine children (his 56 blood descendants therefore making the permutations for suffering regarding his descendant trials exponential) yet through everything he loves God in quiet faithfulness and never ceased loving others in big ways or small.
“All the nurses love him”, a nurse said across his hospital bed to one of my sisters and I as she did 'some maintenance on him. We just smiled, (surprise, surprise), he is universally loved by all who know him because he lives in quiet generous love of others, regardless of circumstances. Professionally, he got to the top of his career and is still, long afterwards, respected for how he conducted himself and what he achieved, but that’s NOT what matters, Love! 🙂

It wasn’t his trials or his achievements that defined whether God loved him or whether he fulfilled God’s will,
any more than that is true of your life
but his faithfulness and practical charity, no matter what…
and this is also what is true for your life.
 
Dear cmscms,

Is there any way you could put your talents to use in your free time? Any skills you might like to develop during evenings and weekends? Any way you are called to volunteer to help others?

As for hearing God’s voice, it can be difficult because they don’t call it a “still small voice” for nothing. I’ve battled unemployment for some time now, finally there are some bright spots of hope on the horizon, but back when it was hugely difficult to deal with, I went one day to the Perpetual Eucharistic Adoration Chapel and asked God what He wanted, since it seemed impossible for me to continue in my chosen profession without a miracle. I left the chapel, not knowing what to do.

Back home that same day, I started walking around the apartment lake to get some exercise on a beautifully pleasant sunny day with white fluffy clouds. All of a sudden, the thought came to me that I could go and sell my pictures at a nearby summer resort under that same beautiful sky. I believe that was an inspiration of the Holy Spirit.

If I were being stubborn, I could have said to myself, “What? Sell pictures? I have no clue how to even start!”

Instead, I imagined being at the resort enjoying gorgeous weather and somehow selling pictures … the thought was too good to pass up. Two years have passed, and this Sunday, one of my fine art photos will be on display in a national juried exhibit in an art museum. This will be the fifth art gallery to display my work.

There are always struggles along the way, spiritual battles. Like how often right before an art show or other art-related travel I would get struck with things like an eye infection, a migraine, car trouble … sometimes I would get hit with more than one at the same time. In order to continue with art, it was mostly a matter of toughing it out and surviving the pain on what was supposed to be a carefree “big day.”

And then the “big day” ends and it’s back to looking for that normal desk job which will actually pay the bills … Plenty of people have prayed for me about this already. And I’ve been surviving on temporary contract jobs which offer no job security … As for the Will of God in all this? It’s to do my best. And whatever happens has to be in God’s hands. That’s just life.

So guess what the title is of the picture that just got accepted into the art museum exhibit? …
“On a Wing and a Prayer.”

I’ll pray for you.
And God’s Will for you may end up being direct,
or may end up being something that He wants you
to change direction for.

🙂
 
cmscms said:
OK, I feel really embarrased to post the following but I need to be honest.

Very often, I feel like there is a little kid inside of me that is kicking and screaming ‘Please don’t make me do God’s will’. I would much rather try and do things my way. The main reason is because I want to have things I believe would make me happy. I can’t help but think that God’s will is for me to be unhappy. (writing it out makes it sound stupid and I am sure people reading this are probably rolling their eyes but I do need to be honest with my inner most thoughs)
Click to expand...
Nope, doesn’t sounds stupid at all. That little kid inside of you is your sinful nature which has an aversion to doing God’s will, not so much because God’s will is scary but because it will not always benefit it because well…it’s sinful. We can do nothing good without God. This is normal. That you think God’s will wont make you happy is for two reasons it seems. 1. You seem to think that happiness can be attained here on earth. You may have been brainwashed by the media :rolleyes:. Don’t worry it can happen to anyone. You cannot escape suffering. Happiness can only be attained in heaven, and you can only get there by doing God’s will. What we can have is joy here on earth. It is an underlying peace we can feel through our suffering on earth. It is not always felt, but is there, it is what gives us the strength to embrace our suffering again and again and yet think fondly of prior things, even though we were suffering. It is a gift of God, ask for this. 2. Lack of trust in God. Normal, everyone has this problem once in a while.
For example, I would like to advance my career and I have the education to do so. Yet, I go on countless interviews and apply for countless jobs with no success. I think that on the one hand, God gave me talents to use and I should put them to use. Yet, I can’t help but think God wants me it a no fun job with not good money because He just doesn’t care to see me prosper.
Click to expand...
It seems to me, I have 2 ways to look at it. 1-) there is something inately flawed in me so I can’t move up the latter. or 2-) God just doesn’t want me to prosper. Both options hurt.
Click to expand...
Why are those your only two options? Firstly, God wants everyone to prosper, but your definition of “prosper” seems to be worldly success, which will not make you any more “happier” at the end of the day. God want’s you to spiritually prosper. No other kind of prosperity should ever come before this one. This prosperity is wrought with suffering but is more rewarding. You will have more joy.

Now, with that in mind it may be that sometimes spiritually prospering may be supplemented with worldly “prospering” like getting a good job, or like some Saints who became successful Kings (i.e. St. Olaf or King David). But in your case it may be that the worldly prospering wont come just yet. God may be teaching you to trust Him, be leading you to some lesson, or may want you to shoot for something else. But you know your vocation, so it could be the first or second.
Usually, when I pray for God’s will, I hear nothing in the sense that there is a ‘block’ that is preventing me from hearing Him. Well recently on a couple of occasions, it felt like there was a void. Like God did not have a will for me.
Click to expand...
Yep, went through the same thing myself at a time. Don’t worry He does, He has one for everyone. You’ll find it out. God doesn’t leave people hanging. Though by will i guess you mean some sort of physical goal, like getting $1 million dollars or curing cancer?
And that is scary since (in my opinion), if you have finished doing God’s will, it means your time here on earth is almost over.
Click to expand...
This would suggest you do. So then again, you’ve bought into the western lie the media has seeped into Christianity as well. God’s will is for you to glorify Him and love Him more and more. Everything else, whether it be curing cancer, having a wife and family, getting $1 million, or bringing world peace, is firstly to supplement the first objective, to come closer to God and love Him more. Remember? What good does it do if one gains the whole world and loses his soul? If I do all these things (prophecy, miracles, etc.) without love it all means nothing? Those passages sum it all up.** Those things you do are for coming closer to God first, then after that they are done for others for the sake of God.** Everything is for God in the end.
Yet, I also believe when your time on earth is almost over, there is also a sense of happiness that you will shortly see God. Since I am not overly happy, I think I will have more time on earth.
Click to expand...
haha I don’t think it works that way. But it would be nice.
 
So basically, how does one submit to God’s will. Is it a Catholic view to see Him as the master and us as the servants (is there even a difference between a servant and a slave?)
Click to expand...
So, prayers that God could help me follow his will would be appreciated. As well as people sharing how they feel about God’s will
Click to expand...
Thanks
Click to expand...
CM
Click to expand...
When you learn more and more about God you will learn that everything is subject to His will, good and evil. As such, yes, He is the Master and we are His servants in a sense, but in another sense, because we are made to His image and have free will, and because Christ became a man and therefore our Brother, it is more accurate to say that He is our Father and we are His children. We are made to love and obey Him and do His will, even if it hurts. In the end we will be fulfilled by Him who is Love, because we are made to do His will and in fulfilling our purpose (to love and glorify Him) we become fulfilled ourselves. We can still disobey, but then we will not be fulfilled (thus, hell is less of a punishment and more of a natural consequence). Do not despair though, for you are God’s beloved daughter. He will not leave you confused. Pray to Him. I’ll pray for you too.
 
HI Trishie,

Thanks for your support and I do appreciate it. However, I just want to point out a difference between me your son and your husband. Both your son and husband are disabled and can’t work. I understand these are difficult issues but ther are different.

I am NOT disabled so I have to keep trying (or else, I am slowly slipping into laziness). There is a difference between being unable to work (so you quit looking and thus do not have to feel the sting of rejection everytime your hopes get up) and not being able to find work. It hurts that no one understands this point. Nobody cares about that problem (many have made fun of me for it in the past) and the second these same people loose their job they call me since ‘You have been through it so you can help me’ How can I give away what I never received.

Now back to God’s will. I sometimes feel like God never wanted me here in the first place. (Again, I know this makes no sense but I am need to be honest again). I wonder if at some point as a kid I made that judgement (ie God does not want me hear) and now I am living the fruits of my unconfessed sin.

Also, (and this is off topic) I did something I feel really ashamed of a few days ago. A bunch of us were out at smoke break at work. There is construction going on. I was joking with the girls that I was trying to get the construction workers attention by kicking my leg. I was doing it so only the girls could see and not the men. A homeless man walked by and asked us for a smoke. No one would give him one. So he walked on by and said ‘God bless’. So I said ‘Gob bless you too’ in a sincere voice. So another lady walked by and said ‘what are you girls laughing at?’ and I pointed to one girl and said ‘She kept kicking her leg to attract the construcion workers and all she attracted was a creep (ie meaning the homeless man’. Well everyone was in stiches laughing. I feel so horrid right after I said it for mocking a child of God. I feel so bad. They all told me not to worry but I know in my heart it was wrong. After all, he was the only one who had the decency to say "God Bless’

I just needed to get that out

CM
 
I often challenged where I am and why God would want me in a certain place at a certain time. in my life. When I look back and I thought I was in the wrong place it was right and when I thought i was in the right place it was so wrong for me. God has a unique plan for each one of us and it is different for each of us. I have found that when I totally surrender to God I have an inner peace that is like no other. When it is my will pushing for something everything ends up unbalanced. If God wants me to clean toilets all day long, then I will and I will do it with Love. After reading stories on Mother Theresa my life took on a new meaning. Try reading her story it will humble you and make you reasize that Gods will is for your salvation and in the end that is ALL that matters. God Bless You and bring you peace.
 
**MANY people are without work, and this doesn’t mean that God doesn’t love them.
The economic conditions have been set by people who mishandled/were self-seeking.
It’s not personal, but it has affected and even wrecked MANY lives.
It isn’t that God doesn’t love these people. There aren’t enough job and some businesses have failed. The economy has be wrecked, in so far as it has been wrecked, by people.

That you don’t love yourself and think God doesn’t, needs attention, needs reprogramming by yourself, with help. Many others also need this kind of help in some form or other.

Failing to show kindness to others is actually what is failing in our vocation, our main calling.

This is the point I was trying to make. This is what we all need to work at, most of all, regardless of situation and experience, and regardless of any other kind of success.

God won’t care who succeeded financially or career-wise.

When Jesus described the last Judgement, with Himself as Judge of souls,
the ONLY question He had, and what divided souls into saved and unsaved,
was who lived practical acts of kindness, which Jesus took also as being kindness to Himself.
See Matthew 25 verses 312-46**
 
God’s will for us is primarily that we obey the commands to love God above all and others as ourselves.
Yes, we should do our best with the abilities God gave us.
And we should value ourselves as loved by God. Jesus commanded, love others as yourselves, and implicit in that command is to love yourself rightly, not self-indulgently, but as God’s loved child like all of God’s other loved children who come into or pass by our lives.

Matthew 25 verses 31-46…

“The Last Judgement”
“When the Son of Man comes in all His glory, escorted by all the angels, then he will take his seat on his throne of glory. All the nations will be assembled before him and he will separate men from one another as the shepherd separates sheep from goats.
He will place the sheep on his right hand and the goats on his left. then the King shall say to those on his right hand,” Come you whom my Father has blessed, take for your heritage the kingdom prepared for you since the foundation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me food; I was a stranger and you made me welcome. I was thirsty and you gave me drink; naked and you clothed me; sick and you visited me, in prison and you came to see me.

T**hen the virtuous will say to him in reply, "Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you; or thirsty and give you drink? When did we see you hungry and feed you; or thirsty and give you drink? When did we see you a stranger and make you welcome; naked and clothe you; sick or in prison and go to see you?

And the King will answer, " I tell you solemnly, in so far as you did this to one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did it to me**."

Next he will say to those on his left “Go away from me with your curse upon you, to the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels, for when I was hungry you never gave me food; I was thirsty and you never gave me anything to drink; I was a stranger and you never made me welcome, naked and you never clothed me, sick and in prison and you never visited me.”
Then it will be their turn to ask, “Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty; a stranger or naked, sick or in prison, and not come to your help?”
Then he will answer, “I tell you solemnly, in so far as you neglected to do this to one of the least of these, you neglected to do it to me.” And they will go away to eternal punishment, and the virtuous to eternal life."
 
cmscms said:
Now back to God’s will. I sometimes feel like God never wanted me here in the first place. (Again, I know this makes no sense but I am need to be honest again). I wonder if at some point as a kid I made that judgement (ie God does not want me hear) and now I am living the fruits of my unconfessed sin.
Click to expand...
Sounds like discussing this with a priest might help?
 
the_phoenix said:
Sounds like discussing this with a priest might help?
Click to expand...
On the surface that does sound like a good idea. But to be honest, any priest I know would say something life ‘God doesn’t make mistakes’ They all give text book answers when I talk to them (And Lord knows I went to several parishes in town)

Just curious, but is it possible that perhaps priest in the States are different than in Canada. I often hear people advise others to talk to a priest and the priests around here are not helpfull in that sense at all

CM
 
Hi,

I’m also struggling with trying to follow God’s will, and not really knowing what it is… there are some things I’ve learned that are really important. I’m not a priest or a spiritual director but I guess this is good advice for any situation 🙂 try to trust in God’s goodness and that He knows what is best for you… that will make it easier. Try to just trust Him as much as you can. He definitely does have a will for you, since He created you, - and loves you infinitely. And He knows all things. I know what you mean about the ‘block’, but try to just put the situation in His hands and keep on asking, and He will help make you ready to hear the answer…and one day, it will just be clear. All in God’s time. Don’t make the conclusion that your time on earth is almost over based on your feelings… we don’t know about such things, and anyway, there’s always more to do for God. We just can’t always hear Him properly, so that’s a good opportunity to learn to rely on faith (it’s difficult I know! but very much worth it).

As for how to submit to His will… sure you can see Him as the Master and yourself as the servant, but there is still a more perfect way. Try to simply love Him as much as you can and trust in His goodness. Try to base it on love. It might take a while, but He will help you grow if you ask Him… sometimes this happens by trials, but sometimes in over ways, in any case, trust Him. Also, try to submit to His will in smaller situations, and then the bigger ones will be easier. Try to submit to His will daily, minute by minute. This can be as simple as accepting a situation that is difficult or annoying to you… or choosing to help a person when you don’t feel like it… or choosing to do the right thing rather than sinning… etc. If you encounter fear about the future or about careers, etc, - then your present cross is the fear, not what you are afraid of. Fear is really counter-productive… we don’t know the future! Just offer that fear to Him and ask Him to take care of you. No matter what happens, try to surrender to His will and put that first.

I think that it’s definitely very difficult to surrender to God’s will, but as we take little steps, it gets easier. We can’t become completely surrendered to Him in a day. Start with the little things.

God bless 🙂
 
cmscms said:
OK, I feel really embarrased to post the following but I need to be honest.

Very often, I feel like there is a little kid inside of me that is kicking and screaming ‘Please don’t make me do God’s will’. I would much rather try and do things my way. The main reason is because I want to have things I believe would make me happy. I can’t help but think that God’s will is for me to be unhappy. (writing it out makes it sound stupid and I am sure people reading this are probably rolling their eyes but I do need to be honest with my inner most thoughs)
Click to expand...
I think that’s a pretty amazing statement-and speaks of something we all experience in one way or another. Speaking of Original Sin and the fall, the CCC says:

399 Scripture portrays the tragic consequences of this first disobedience. Adam and Eve immediately lose the grace of original holiness.280 They become afraid of the God of whom they have conceived a distorted image - that of a God jealous of his prerogatives.281

The sin of Adam & Eve, the reason they disobeyed, was that they thought they could make themselves happier than God could-that He was holding something back. The lesson we’re to learn here on earth is that nothing but God, Himself, can make us happy in any deep and exhaustive way- in the way we want-, and that He desires that for us above all else and desires it to an extent we don’t even know is possible. And until we really figure out that it never was Him, but rather us who has it wrong, we’ll kick and scream the whole way, continuing to see Him as a big spoil sport whether we’re conscious of it or not.
 
About understanding God’s will: I have concluded that God is like a chess master. He is always about 6 moves ahead. If I let him move my pieces, I will not understand the strategy, but will win in the end. Sometimes a pawn, rook, bishop, or even a queen has to be sacrificed. If I jump in and move my own pieces, His strategy is undermined and the game is at risk.

About finding a better job: Pray to St. Joseph. He is our guy in regard to manly virtues. Strength, courage, and supporting a family are his specialties.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top