Confused by what is allowable

[Quaesitor]

Yes one of you will need to be Catholic. Baptism is the gateway to all other sacraments, so baptism then marriage. Once he has an annulment you can get baptized then your marriage can be convalidated.

 

[Sebrina]

Without getting your husbands first marriage annulled you can’t be baptized because the second you were you’ll be sinning because, according to the Church, you’re living in sin. They won’t let you do this.

I recommend reading these Catholic Updates, it should really help you out.

Ten Questions About Annulment
Bringing Your Marriage Into the Church

They just had us read these in our RCIA class.

So if I understand this correctly, I need to get baptized in order to become a full member of the church in order to receive full sacraments and for my husband to get an anullment. But you’re also saying they won’t baptize me because we are living in sin.

I’ll try and get an appointment to talk to our parish priest because this has too many different answers. Thank you for your help, though. Those links were very informative concerning the process of annulment.

 

[SuscipeMeDomine]

Thank you for those links. I did read both of them, but they didn’t go into detail at all about my problem or confusion which is… does a baptism come first or after a marriage convalidation.

The order would be

1. Declaration of nullity for your husband’s prior marriage
2. Convalidation of your current marriage
3. Sacraments of initiation for you (and note that at the point where you are baptized, your marriage to another baptized person also becomes sacramental)

 

[Quaesitor]

Your or your husband don’t need to be Catholic in order to submit for his annulment, from what I’ve been told.

If I got the order of the baptism and convalidation wrong I’m sorry. But to get your husbands annulment you just need to submit for it soon.

Definitely you need to talk to your priest, if we are not helping, well no matter what.

I heard from someone who was with me last year in RCIA that he just finally got his annulment and now he can be baptized. But you shouldn’t drop out at all, at least until you go and see your priest.

 

[Vico]

So if I understand this correctly, I need to get baptized in order to become a full member of the church in order to receive full sacraments and for my husband to get an anullment. But you’re also saying they won’t baptize me because we are living in sin.

I’ll try and get an appointment to talk to our parish priest because this has too many different answers. Thank you for your help, though. Those links were very informative concerning the process of annulment.

Since your husband and his first wife were both baptized their marriage was sacramental. That means they may be still married per the divine law. If you separate from you husband, then you can receive baptism. But, to convalidate, he must be free to marry, and that would need proof by the tribunal that a sacramental marriage never existed in the first place. There is no guarantee that it will the the outcome. Ultimately, to be Catholic, you will need to accept and believe the faith, including the divine law of matrimony. So you have to choose being Catholic vs your marriage.

 

[hockeyfan]

Without getting your husbands first marriage annulled you can’t be baptized because the second you were you’ll be sinning because, according to the Church, you’re living in sin. They won’t let you do this.

I recommend reading these Catholic Updates, it should really help you out.

Ten Questions About Annulment
Bringing Your Marriage Into the Church

They just had us read these in our RCIA class.

Thank you. My brother’s situation ties into both of those links.(very well actually. His divorce is actually almost exactly like what happened in the story in the 4th question with the flower child. It was also performed like the 7th one without the convalidation. I just talked to him and it seems he may be interested in fixing the problems in the future.

 

[Hoernchen]

Without getting your husbands first marriage annulled you can’t be baptized because the second you were you’ll be sinning because, according to the Church, you’re living in sin. They won’t let you do this.

I recommend reading these Catholic Updates, it should really help you out.

Ten Questions About Annulment
Bringing Your Marriage Into the Church

They just had us read these in our RCIA class.

That is not quite true. It is possible to be baptized even though you still live in an invalid marriage. Last month my husband was baptized and confirmed. I am his fourth wife. Obviously we were not married in the church. When I turned back to God and the church three years ago I promised to live as brother and sister to be able to recieve the sacraments. Before his baptism my husband promised the same.
We still see ourselfes as a married couple and will celebrate our upcoming tenth (civil) wedding anniversary. But we sleep in seperate rooms and any physical affection never goes farther than a kiss and an embrace. We are prepared to do so for the rest of our lifes as it is very unlikely to recieve three positive rulings of anullment! We might have a chance with the pauline privilege but we do not get our hopes up too much.