Contraception advice

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A hypothetical for you. A woman has a very serious heart condition. She is advised most strongly against having more children. Am I right in thinking her only option from a Catholic perspective is pretty much abstinence in her marriage? Contraception in any form is still out of the question? My understanding in this area needs some work.
 
Contraception is out of the question no matter what. In this case, I think abstinence would be the best.
 
NFP is a reasonable option if she and her husband do not feel that complete abstinence is not.
 
Indeed, but it could still be risky.
NFP is highly effective, but there is indeed always still a potential for life. If the risk to the mother’s health is grave, then in some situations abstinence would be preferred.
 
abstinence in her marriage
she can use NFP. If she attends training regarding the Creighton method or some other successful NFP options, she can learn how it works.

NFP works much better than people think. The whole idea that a woman can get pregnant during anytime of the month was really a scare tactic people originally used to scare kids out of having sex and now use to sell the pill.

Most dioceses have a list of local training courses that men & women can both attend.

God bless
 
I would recommend the Pope Paul VI Institute. They would have the best, most up-to-date, and complete information.

Also I can tell you that nobody has ever died from lack of sex, even for periods of 20 plus years. Sex is important in a marriage, but there are dozens of scenarios, from husbands or wives in the military being sent out on long missions, to accidents resulting in impotence, to prison, long illness, etc. in which sex becomes impossible, but the marriage itself not only can continue, but even thrive.
 
If we are being completely logical and reasonable here, and a medical doctor did say “most strongly” to not have any more children, then by all means contraception would be logical and reasonable as well. What’s the church say about vasectomies? That is just my opinion about this theoretical question.
 
NFP would definitely be the best option. I do not see how abstinence would be healthy for a marriage because sex with your spouse is one of the most intimate forms of love that you show to one another. My husband and I have been married for 10 years and have never used birth control and things have worked out well for us.
 
The Catholic church teaches that vasectomies are not an acceptable way of regulating births. I would recommend reading both Humanae Vitae and Evengelium Vitae. The following passage is from Humanae Vitae:
14.Therefore We base Our words on the first principles of a human and Christian doctrine of marriage when We are obliged once more to declare that the direct interruption of the generative process already begun and, above all, all direct abortion, even for therapeutic reasons, are to be absolutely excluded as lawful means of regulating the number of children. (14) Equally to be condemned, as the magisterium of the Church has affirmed on many occasions, is direct sterilization, whether of the man or of the woman, whether permanent or temporary. (15)

Similarly excluded is any action which either before, at the moment of, or after sexual intercourse, is specifically intended to prevent procreation—whether as an end or as a means. (16)

Neither is it valid to argue, as a justification for sexual intercourse which is deliberately contraceptive, that a lesser evil is to be preferred to a greater one, or that such intercourse would merge with procreative acts of past and future to form a single entity, and so be qualified by exactly the same moral goodness as these. Though it is true that sometimes it is lawful to tolerate a lesser moral evil in order to avoid a greater evil or in order to promote a greater good," it is never lawful, even for the gravest reasons, to do evil that good may come of it (18)—in other words, to intend directly something which of its very nature contradicts the moral order, and which must therefore be judged unworthy of man, even though the intention is to protect or promote the welfare of an individual, of a family or of society in general. Consequently, it is a serious error to think that a whole married life of otherwise normal relations can justify sexual intercourse which is deliberately contraceptive and so intrinsically wrong.
 
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When Hubby and I were undergoing our marriage preparation, we were taught about NFP and Church teaching regarding contraception. (We were already aware of it but it was a good refresher.) Our course was taught by three different married couples. One of the wives said, “We decided we had completed our family, so Husband got a vasectomy.” Husband said, “Hurts.” She added, “Then we learned what the Church teaches about contraception and he had it reversed.*” Husband said, “Hurts more.”

*Note that it is NOT a Church requirement that a vasectomy be reversed; this was a personal choice they made.
 
Abstinence, total or periodic continence.

I do have such a friend. Congenital heart defect. She and her husband use NFP.

They hoped that her doctor would some day give them the green light, but that hasn’t happened. So they continue to use NFP, they’ve been married 15 years.
 
If we are being completely logical and reasonable here, and a medical doctor did say “most strongly” to not have any more children, then by all means contraception would be logical and reasonable as well. What’s the church say about vasectomies? That is just my opinion about this theoretical question.
Contraception is never a moral choice, nor is sterilization.
 
Contraception wouldn’t be effective enough. If it were, you’d see fewer abortions. People get pregnant while on the pill.

I think this couple would need to understand NFP better. If I were in this woman’s shoes I would only have sex in the very safest time. An NFP teacher can explain this better and the best instructor must be sought out. A sex life would be quite reduced but still possible based on my knowledge of NFP. I can explain more, but it’s risky because beginner NFP’ers might get misinformation.

I would tell her to strengthen her heart as much as possible, doing whatever exercise the cardiologist allows. In my opinion, most women are very unfit, and leave a lot of room for improvement in their heart fitness. I’d also see about three cardiologists and see if they agree with each other.

Then I’d take what doctors say with a grain of salt, because they can’t assume much liability. I would probably do what I wanted anyways.

After 19 years of being told “you’ll need a liver transplant in 5 or 10 years,” and not needing one, I can tell you doctors can be very fallible people indeed. They have to err on the side of caution, but it can make your life hell that they do. Sometimes, it’s better to trust in God even if it means dying young. It’s not much fun worrying about dying anyways. We’re all going to die, and there are a lot worse things than dying while giving birth to a beautiful new baby who will bring your husband much joy. Of course, you’re not going to tempt fate by being completely dense to what the doctors are saying. But you must understand, your health can improve more than you sometimes believe. Pregnancy might even help some conditions. It’s not a disease.

I’d get the top medical advice and really try to understand the risks.
 
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NFP is not as effective as the Billings Method. I haven’t had a child for six years for mental health reasons
 
Ok. Thank you, that’s a very clear Catholic perspective answer. Of course, it becomes more complicated when the person in question isn’t Catholic, but at least I am aware of the Catholic standpoint and can have a clear conscience in any advice I may or may not give. Hypothetically.
 
NFP is not as effective as the Billings Method. I haven’t had a child for six years for mental health reasons
Rather than a different or opposing method, the Billings Method is a type of NFP.

https://learnnfponline.com/billings-ovulation-method/

NFP is a term that encompasses methods of regulating births based on the natural signs of fertility given by the woman’s body (temperature, mucus, cervix, hormones, etc…)

Often times, people misunderstand the term NFP to just mean the “rhythm method” which can cause people to incorrectly write NFP off as ineffective.

With all the different techniques that fall under the NFP umbrella, it is extremely effective and maintains an openness to life and appreciates God’s beautiful design of the biological signs and functions imbued into the creation of women. By recognizing and appreciating these functions, both men and women can better acknowledge and uphold the dignity of their bodies.
 
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When advising a non-Catholic (or Catholics with misunderstandings) on Catholic teaching, I recommend taking an approach that helps to clarify why the Church teaches what it does.

Sometimes, it can seem like the Catholic Church and it’s teachings are just a bunch of rules and lists of what is bad and what you aren’t allowed to do. When someone has this opinion, it is hard to appreciate or understand the value of what the Church teaches.

Help to show these people that, instead of giving lists and rules regulating what you aren’t allowed to do, Church teaching shows us what we DO and the reasons that we do them.

The Church’s teachings on sex and contraception are not “because sex is BAD and we should only use it for making babies”. Rather, the Church teaches that sex is GOOD and a vital component of the marriage covenant.

When couples correctly engage in the marital act, they are saying to each other:

“I love, appreciate, and accept every part of you, and I offer you every part of me.”

When couples resort to using contraception, the message they are giving each other (even if they don’t realize it) is:

“I want you, I desire you, but only on my terms; I reject those parts and abilities of you that God designed to be able to give life. I offer you myself, but only some of me. I am withholding from you the parts and abilities that God has given me to be able to create life.”

The Catholic teachings on contraception are not just a rule or regulation. They are an explanation of how couples are to partake in the marital act, offering themselves completely, selflessly, and lovingly to each other, fully appreciating the amazing gift that they each are to each other.

Catholic teaching shows us how to uphold the dignity of our spouse rather than reject their dignity and use them as an object for our own gratification.
 
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NFP is not as effective as the Billings Method. I haven’t had a child for six years for mental health reasons
I’m not sure what you mean.

The Billings Method ^is* NFP…

So are sympto-thermal, Creighton, and Marquette.
 
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