R
rpp
Guest
While pondering the the increasing intensity, polarization and grotesqueness of current political climate this afternoon, I got a call from a friend. After we got off the phone I began thinking about her children and her family in general. She has 7 children from 5 to the early 20s. They are a remarkably harmonious family with deep commitment to their Catholic faith as well as a sense of community. She has two children in military service. Now they do not always get along, but they always seek to work it out peacefully.
I got to thinking how nice it would be if the current political fighting were not so selfish and unable to see the point of view of others. How nice if would be if people would debate and discuss the way my friend’s family does. I thought about my own family, I am one of six, and we all had to learn early on how to get along with people we do not agree with.
Then this thought hit me and I quickly came with this this hypothesis. I have no idea if it is a contributing factor, but bear with me as I explain. Then poke holes, or plug holes, as you see fit.
The dynamic of large families is very different than that of small ones. Particularly if there are three or more generations living under one roof. This was how most families were in years past. 3 to 6 children were typical. This was especially true in rural areas where the need for labor was good and child mortality was high. Anyway, the children growing up in these households were generally not exposed to much outside their village or town. They had to learn early on to get along with their siblings, deal with the town bully and co-exist with people whom they disagreed with or even despised. The kind of behavior we see in public today would destroy these small communities.
Contrast that with today. Most families have only one or two children. For many, their first babysitter is the TV. Children who have few or no siblings do not really learn the concept of sharing as deeply as those in large families do. In short the children tend to be spoiled. As their parents were raised in similar environment, no one sees the problem. They do not have the ability to practice civility since there are fewer people in their immediate (household) surroundings. Because of the fast paced and very mobile society, people are often not forced by circumstances to spend years, or even decades, with those they disagree or despise.
From this, the next generations decides that it should now be a criminal offense to “bully” someone (This is the case in Oregon. What constitutes bully is not defined and is completely subjective.) And this same dysfunctional generation comes up with silly ideas like not keeping score at little league games, and that it is more important to teach self-esteem than the three R’s.
So today we have a society that has diverged. We have people that grew up in large families in a more historically tradition manner and we have people who grew up in this isolated and over-stimulated modern environment. These two groups can barely communicate with each other. They disagree on fundamental issues.
The modern group tend to lack the patience because they are so used to the instant gratification they have been conditioned for by TV, DVD, video games, computers, the Internet, Cable TVs DVRs, iPods, cell phones, etc. The more traditional people tend to use these to a lesser degree but even then they have to balance their use, e.g. the family video game has to be shared by 4 or more people, not just one or two. Thus their sense of patience has not been as impaired as the modern group.
In additoin, because larger families tend to also have a greater diversity of opinion within the household, thus giving family member more practice at dealing with differences and friction. The modern group does not get this practice as often as there simply because their are fewer people and, therefore, generally less divergence of opinion.
As a result, the members modern group tends to, often without realizing they are doing it, belittle members of the more traditional group. Generally, the traditional group takes it on the chin because they have learned to do that. HOWEVER, on the occassions whan a member of the more traditional group says something that is percieved as not favorable, the members of the more modern group, because they have not learned to take it on the chin, over-react. Still the the more traditional returns toi default position of patience.
As this escalates, eventually the members of the more modern group begin to believe that the more tradiitonal group does not really exist and are mystified when people disagree with them. This final insult is profoundly infuriating to the members of the more traditional group do not tradition group have reached their boiling point. Instead of simply responding, they have been holding back. Like water boiling in a sealed can, it can become dangerous.
And what is the root cause of all this social conflict?
Contraception and, of course, abortion.
I got to thinking how nice it would be if the current political fighting were not so selfish and unable to see the point of view of others. How nice if would be if people would debate and discuss the way my friend’s family does. I thought about my own family, I am one of six, and we all had to learn early on how to get along with people we do not agree with.
Then this thought hit me and I quickly came with this this hypothesis. I have no idea if it is a contributing factor, but bear with me as I explain. Then poke holes, or plug holes, as you see fit.
The dynamic of large families is very different than that of small ones. Particularly if there are three or more generations living under one roof. This was how most families were in years past. 3 to 6 children were typical. This was especially true in rural areas where the need for labor was good and child mortality was high. Anyway, the children growing up in these households were generally not exposed to much outside their village or town. They had to learn early on to get along with their siblings, deal with the town bully and co-exist with people whom they disagreed with or even despised. The kind of behavior we see in public today would destroy these small communities.
Contrast that with today. Most families have only one or two children. For many, their first babysitter is the TV. Children who have few or no siblings do not really learn the concept of sharing as deeply as those in large families do. In short the children tend to be spoiled. As their parents were raised in similar environment, no one sees the problem. They do not have the ability to practice civility since there are fewer people in their immediate (household) surroundings. Because of the fast paced and very mobile society, people are often not forced by circumstances to spend years, or even decades, with those they disagree or despise.
From this, the next generations decides that it should now be a criminal offense to “bully” someone (This is the case in Oregon. What constitutes bully is not defined and is completely subjective.) And this same dysfunctional generation comes up with silly ideas like not keeping score at little league games, and that it is more important to teach self-esteem than the three R’s.
So today we have a society that has diverged. We have people that grew up in large families in a more historically tradition manner and we have people who grew up in this isolated and over-stimulated modern environment. These two groups can barely communicate with each other. They disagree on fundamental issues.
The modern group tend to lack the patience because they are so used to the instant gratification they have been conditioned for by TV, DVD, video games, computers, the Internet, Cable TVs DVRs, iPods, cell phones, etc. The more traditional people tend to use these to a lesser degree but even then they have to balance their use, e.g. the family video game has to be shared by 4 or more people, not just one or two. Thus their sense of patience has not been as impaired as the modern group.
In additoin, because larger families tend to also have a greater diversity of opinion within the household, thus giving family member more practice at dealing with differences and friction. The modern group does not get this practice as often as there simply because their are fewer people and, therefore, generally less divergence of opinion.
As a result, the members modern group tends to, often without realizing they are doing it, belittle members of the more traditional group. Generally, the traditional group takes it on the chin because they have learned to do that. HOWEVER, on the occassions whan a member of the more traditional group says something that is percieved as not favorable, the members of the more modern group, because they have not learned to take it on the chin, over-react. Still the the more traditional returns toi default position of patience.
As this escalates, eventually the members of the more modern group begin to believe that the more tradiitonal group does not really exist and are mystified when people disagree with them. This final insult is profoundly infuriating to the members of the more traditional group do not tradition group have reached their boiling point. Instead of simply responding, they have been holding back. Like water boiling in a sealed can, it can become dangerous.
And what is the root cause of all this social conflict?
Contraception and, of course, abortion.