Conversion Question - Divorced with Children

[aschoonover]

I’m in kind of a complicated family situation and would appreciate advice regarding conversion to the Catholic church. Among several other issues, I am trying to sort out how to discuss converting my children to Catholicism with my ex-husband. He is not Catholic, and he comes from a Protestant background that is fairly anti-Catholic. Our children are 12, 9, and 6. Does he have a “say” in their religious upbringing (at my house, anyway)? I know he won’t agree to baptism, because I’ve asked about it in the past. Should I explain why I am converting and explain why I think this is best for the kids? Do I need to discuss this with him and hear/answer his objections? Do I need his permission to baptize the children? Do I just tell him that this is how it’s going to be? I don’t know what I’m required to do by law, nor am I sure what the right thing to do is from a moral or Christian standpoint. Has anyone else dealt with this? Any advice?

 

[Joe_5859]

My recommendation would be to talk to a priest. Priests have been trained for these matters and he would be in a better position to evaluate the specifics of your situation.

In general, only one parent needs to consent in order for a child to be baptized (though it is, of course, preferable if they both do). But how you handle that in your situation depends on a lot of variables.

Further, this probably only applies to your 6 year old. Once a child is past the age of reason (age 7), their entry into the Church is much more like the initiation of adults than that of infants.

Again, talking to a priest is going to be your best bet. These situations can be complicated, but they are not insurmountable. The priest will help you.

God bless you and your family!

 

[aemcpa]

The children are old enough that their own personal consent will be required for baptism. If they receive the required instruction in the Faith, and they ask for baptism of their own free will, the Church will not deny them baptism. If you are the custodial parent and you provide them with that instruction to the satisfaction of the pastor, then their father would not have the ability to prevent their baptisms.

 

[SonCatcher]

The older children are already of an age that any Protestant would accept their baptism. I have seen Southern Baptists baptize children as young as 6 (they are careful to “test” the child’s reason when they do), so even the youngest one likely would be accepted if he/she shows some initiative in this.

Canon law is clear that only one parent needs to give permission for a child to be baptized. This only applies to the 6 year old.

If you are not yet fully received into the Church, the youngest may have to wait until you are. However, the older two could be received in a parallel process with yours (some parishes use the same classes with adults while others merge them with the regular children’s catechism classes).

 

[HolyRosaryChild]

God’s Spirit is in my heart,
He has called me and set me apart.
This is what I have to do,
what I have to do.

He sent me to give the Good News to the poor,
Tell prisoners that they are prisoners no more,
Tell blind people that they can see,
And set the downtrodden free
And go tell everyone the news that the Kingdom of God has come,
And go tell everyone the news that the Kingdom of God has come.

Just as the Father sent me,
So I’m sending you out to be
My witnesses throughout the world,
The whole of the world.

Don’t worry what you have to say,
Don’t worry because on that day
God’s Spirit will speak in your heart,
Will speak in your heart.