I was in a similar situation.
Just following Easter in 2013, I asked my friend (who is several years older than me, and quite experienced in the Christian faith) if he could take me to a service. I was curious about Christianity, and wanted to see what it was about. Events in my life up to that point had me questioning Faith, and all it entices.
Previously, I had attended a Youth Bible Study. In that case, I wanted to see what I denied.
In Mid-2013, a Pastor attended the Church I was at, and I made a public profession of my Faith. It was a big moment for me.
Then by Late-2013, I felt I needed something more. Given the lack of leadership in the Church, I hadn’t been approached about expanding my faith by an elder and was feeling lost…
In my small town, I had two other choices. Anglicans or Catholics.
Anglicanism had no place for me. I knew its origins, and felt they were inappropriate.
That left one choice. There are a lot of Protestant groups who are very vocally anti-Catholic. It took a lot of “weeding” to get past that. I found out about the Lurem-Verum apologetics, and that got me started. I felt a strong pull towards the Church. Something I hand’t felt with the Protestant Church before…
Finally, early last year, a “sermon” with no sense of meaning or direction uprooted me at last. I finally attended the Catholic Church, and while it was a Communion Service, not a Mass, there was a profoundly different feeling and attitude. The first real Mass I attended was special. There was something else there.
Push came to shove, and I entered a one-on-one RCIA program (Small town
).
In September, I was Baptised and Confirmed as Roman Catholic.
I have seen things and felt things many have not felt:
In particular, a profound presence during our “Sacramental Mass,” for all the youth going through with their faith as well as my own conversion. A presence right beside me!
During the Transubstantiation, twice now, I have felt a strong sense of love and warmth inside.
Then during an Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament at an event for Young Men contemplating the Priesthood last week… I looked upon the Altar, where the Sacrament was placed. Immediately, the sun broke through the clouds, beaming into the chapel. The shadow of the Cross appeared on the wall behind the Blessed Sacrament.
Like one older lady (and dear friend of mine) at my Parish said; Cradle Catholics often take their faith for granted. But those who convert often bring a love and lust for the faith many do not have.
My God-Mother’s own mother had something similar to say!
Its important to Pray MUCH on this matter. Discern this Vocation of yours. Get a Catholic Book of Prayer, and a Rosary. Set aside plenty of time each day (whenever) and pray about it, think about it. Saying a Rosary every day feels “forced” at first, but then, you’ll begin to notice things changing in your life, for the better. All of a sudden, you want to pray in the morning, mid-day and afternoon.
Find the facts and weed out the lies. Watch out for stuff that seems heavily biased.
Our fellow member “PJM” posted on my own thread like yours when I had my own questions. He is an RCIA instructor at his Parish, and has been of immense help to me personally. I hope that he comes across this thread, and can do the same for you.
Sorry for the long, and perhaps jumbled post. But this is my experience, and I feel it is similar to what you might be going through at the moment. Please take it all to heart.
God Bless You on your journey. Please keep us posted with how things work out.
