I was confirmed last Easter. My only hold back was just not being exposed to the truth of the Church. It was the big bad, a dictatorial, backwards institution. I always admired its beauty but thought its history repressive. It never helped that the way Catholicism was treated at school reinforced this. It was like behold the artistic heritage that was the greatest influence on Western Civilization… behold they are the most repressive regime in world history.
My process did take about 3 years. I started as someone who was raised Baptist but was coming directly from atheism. There was about six months of me accepting God, three months of me deciding I needed to be part of a Church, three months of me deciding it could the Catholic Church, one year of me attending Mass and knowing for sure I wanted to be Catholic and about a year of RCIA. There is so much to know about Catholicism and I am glad RCIA takes a long time. I wished we actually had more time in RCIA, maybe the the same time span but more than one hour/week.
The feeling that it should be easier does not make sense to me. If it where easier/quicker I could also easily wonder if I made a rushed decision that was not well examined. If it seems burdensome what is the depth of desire, commitment and the real intent? People spend 4-8 years seeking higher education. My undergrad took five years and most weeks I was in class at 12-15 hours and studying about the same amount of hours, if not more. That was to launch a career that I am actually now pivoting away from. What is an hour/week for a year that leads to the salvation of your soul and the path of a lifetime? The Church demands much of us, but that is another reason why it is good and worth the effort.
I still had doubts coming into the Church, but I have complete faith in the wisdom of the Church and the Church’s ability to work through tough issues, even if it takes centuries. I still have struggles with some teachings but trust that it is part of my cross and some things may not be fully understood until the Beatific vision. I trust that God lead me to the Church, so it must be good. I see the difference in my life and this change in me gives life while all else was bringing me closer to death.