Converts vs. Cradle Catholics

[JRKH]

I’ve always been very interested in Catholicism and religion as I am very interested in history. However, the more and more I read and learn about Catholicism, the less I believe in it. And when I try to explain my to many Catholics they just say I’m being stubborn or that I’m not trying hard enough. When I hear converts talk about how much they love being Catholic the cynic in mean just says it’s because they didn’t experience it growing up. While I do have good memories of Catholicism, I also remember being terrified at 5 years old because I was told that Jesus died for me and feeling like I was a bad, evil person for making someone suffer like that. Or when I was seven and a brother at my parish was arrested for sexual misconduct and I was told to never talk about him again. Or a couple of teachers in high school who thought the only way a teenager could possibly believe is through guilt and fear. I really wish that I could be like the many converts who come into this religion with a blank slate, but a lot of aspects of Catholicism are just associated with the negative for me.

Yes, I can see how this sort of baggage can be a hindrance and it may simply be that you need to take some time, step back and rebuild your faith apart from these old experiences.

I too like history, though I can’t say that I have really studied that much Church history.
Certainly looking at Church history can cause one to question but then again, history must always be looked at in context too. Many mistakes occurred and yet the truth remained firm.
That was something that helped me.

Peace
James

 

[eo_chibears]

Having read these boards for several months I’ve noticed that many converts seem much more enthusiastic about being Catholic than those of us who grew up in the Church. (Not to say there are not many wonderful, devout cradle Catholics out there, so don’t start on that topic.) Many Catholic converts are really into things like the TLM, rosaries, novenas, and the many aspects unique to the Catholic faith. My question for converts is, what makes you so enthusiastic about being Catholic? Is it because you actually chose the faith for yourself? I’m pretty honest about where I am in my Catholic faith right now, it’s just something I was born into and that I kind of, sort of believe in . Could any converts out there answer this? I must admit I’m both jealous and surprised (in a good way) by your faith and enthusiasm.

I personally studied the Catholic faith for a couple years before going to RCIA. Through my research of many religions it was the right faith for me. It’s the only faith that I feel connected to Christ through.

 

[Usige]

While I do have good memories of Catholicism, I also remember being terrified at 5 years old because I was told that Jesus died for me and feeling like I was a bad, evil person for making someone suffer like that. Or when I was seven and a brother at my parish was arrested for sexual misconduct and I was told to never talk about him again. Or a couple of teachers in high school who thought the only way a teenager could possibly believe is through guilt and fear. I really wish that I could be like the many converts who come into this religion with a blank slate, but a lot of aspects of Catholicism are just associated with the negative for me.

I can definitely understand how those experiences could take the joy out of the faith. My guess is you are right that most converts do not come to the faith with the same kind of guilt baggage train.

It seems like you were often only shown the bad without the good. My 3 youngest have been raised in the faith since birth, and we don’t blunt the truth about sin. That being said we balance any lesson about sin with the hope of salvation. If all you get is guilt and told how bad we are you are only getting half the story. Emphasizing the fallen nature of man without including the redemption bought by Christ almost seems cruel.

I can only pray that you will someday be able to look past the harm done to your faith and be able to see the true redemptive message of the Church.

 

[JRKH]

Irish Eyes 826,

I took a look at your profile and noticed your two favorite Bible verses. (Micah 6:8 and 1 Cor13:7-7)
They are wonderful and speak truthfully to the core of Christianity.
I would off you another which was another core passage in my journey. Matthew 22:36-40
36 “Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?” 37 And He said to him, " You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.' 38 "This is the great and foremost commandment. 39 "The second is like it, Your shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ 40 “On these two commandments depend the whole Law and the Prophets.”
"On these two commandments (based on Love) is built all of the law and prophets - in other words, all that God has given us is based on Love. Likewise the Holy Spirit reveals to us through St John in His first letter that God IS Love.
7 Beloved, let us love one another; for love is of God, and he who loves is born of God and knows God. 8 He who does not love does not know God; for God is love. (1 John 4:7-8)
So I believe that you are well grounded because you are seeking God in Love. Your questions and your doubts stem, not from a rejection of God per-se, but from trying to reconcile the image of God presented to you over the years - the image of a cold and judgmental God - with the True and full image of God who IS Love, as revealed in Holy Scripture.

As one who was raised Catholic (and had some of the same experiences you have had) left the Church for many years and then returned, I can assure you that the True and Loving God is indeed here in the Catholic Church. The members of that Church can very often be poor examples (myself included). We can be judgmental, short tempered, selfish, greedy etc. This is true even of clergy, and yet, the Church herself teaches what is good and does not compromise in her teaching.
There is an old saying that goes, do not leave Peter because of Judas. It means, do not leave the true Church over the sins of individuals.

As one simple Catholic to another, and I offer this from my heart of hearts, I implore you to not give up on the Church. For in the Church is the real presence of Christ in the Eucharist. I did not realize this for many years and when I did, it was nearly too late for me to get back - so deeply was I in sin.
But this one thing ultimately drew me back…The Real Presence - the Eucharist.

So - I encourage you to question, to debate, to struggle in your heart, even to set aside certain dogma for a time (though do not reject it) and just stick to the basic fundamentals of the Faith. I too struggle with some of the Dogma’s of the faith. There are some things I cannot fully embrace, but which I will not reject.

If you would like to discuss anything privately - please feel free to PM me.

Peace
James