Just a suggestion. Start taking your medication again before you decide to be a nun. Your depression may have gone into remission or you may be in denial. Yet, to find out if you have a real calling. Go to daily Mass if possible,Hi everyone. I have felt called to be a nun for some time. However, I have also been diagnosed with major depression, anxiety disorder, and borderline personality disorder (primarily a mood disorder). I have been off of my medication for over two months and I feel fine. I only got seriously depressed twice in the past month. I honestly feel like God is healing me of my mental illnesses. Is it possible that I could be called to a religious vocation?
The Lord I know will care for you and guide and guard you in every way and make all your hopes and dreams come true. “My Ways are not your ways”.Thanks for your encouragement Barb. I think the first thing I will do is contact my priest again about a spiritual director that he had lined up for me and see if that lady is still willing to work with me. I will go from there.Hi again Holly…Please do not be discouraged on account of anything I have said, or perhaps anyone else either. For my part, drawing only on my Australian experience, religious orders here will not accept a person with a history of mental illness. Things may be different in the USA, especially if you do for a while remain well and your doctor is prepared to support you.
Have you looked into The Servants of The Sacred Cross, an ecumenical Order. Here is their website, and do have a good wander around it: thesacredcross.org/main.htm
Not to say that you would be accepted, it is worth looking at though, and if attracted then at least to send an email to them.
If you feel you have a vocation, ***don’t let anything at all discourage you ***until you feel you may have exhausted all avenues. It is The Lord calling to you, not The Church and regulations, or an Order and regulations, or anyone else and their regulations and notions - it is The Lord who can do all things!!!
Perhaps an Order over there may well be prepared to consider you. Seeking spiritual advice would be a very good move but it just might (it is here I know) be difficult to find a spirtual director who insights all about mental illness. It was 20 odd years before I could find a director who was not afraid (and fear is the word I think) because I do suffer a mental illness and would direct me spiritually. But you may find differently and if The Lord wants it, then you surely will. I can only share drawing on my own experience which is limited to Australian shores. I will be daily praying for you.
There are so many hangups (create stigma) around connected to mental illness and most of them formed on totally incorrect information and hence understanding. These seem to occur often in The Church too.
Here in Australia, realizing that no Order would accept me with my own history, even though my psychiatrist is quite prepared to talk with an Order over the phone or in person…whichever they wish…or simply write to them and support my application. Anyway realizing my cause seemed indeed hopeless and I had done my best, I am now continuing to live happily under private vows with a director/confessor a specific way of life. Whether I ever actually form a type of community based rather on this lifestyle I live remains to be seen but I certainly am aware of no calling to found such at this point. However, if I thought an established Order here would consider me, then I would be discerning again. At times I long very much for community and community life - for an ongoing formation process…as very difficult as a community life can be yet it can be very joyous too and a great support. Like all things, there are challanges and there are rewards.
As long as you have a desire to give yourself totally to The Lord in a religious life, pursue it with all your heart and soul…The Lord, indeed can be full of surprises and “His Ways are not ours”. Follow your heart and your ‘star’…as St. Therese wrote “God would not instill desires He cannot fulfill”…but His Ways are indeed not ours and they way He does fulfill you to the absolute, may be a surprise…or it may well be as you hope just now. No way to predict.
But I really want to stress to you that the situation in the USA may be different, especially with so many new and realy exciting new charisma in religious living cropping up over there…not so much here at all, not much at all - most rare.
If you are off medication and feeling ok and especially if a medico or doctor is supporting you…you go for it and dont let anyone discourage you about anything re your hopes and desires and what you set your sights on!!!
God’s richest blessings and may The Lord fulfill the deepest desires of your heart…Barb
Edit: Holly, you must have posted as I was typing the above. I have just read your post. Yes we have many saints who were lay people…St. Catherine of Siena was a lay person who lived at home. She was only one of our saints who were lay and a great saint she is indeed. Do you understand what a Third Order is, if no, I will explain. She was a Third Order Dominican, which means she was a lay woman attached to the Dominican Order and lived in her own home.
It also looks as if probably the parents of St. Therese of Lisieux will be canonized…I will try to remember to post something on this into this Forum if it has not already been posted.
Well, I already consider myself to be sympathetic to those who have mental illnesses because I have mental illnesses but you are right, God may be calling me to be more sympathetic to those with mental illnesses.
Just a quick summary in case you don’t know re Third Orders. If I miss anything, I hope another member will correct me. I did do an internet search but all the answers I came up with were complex even to me who knows a little at least about them.
A Third Order nowadays for lay people can go by various names, but what it means is that they are comprised of laity - men and women - who live in their own homes, do not wear a religious habit and follow the Rule (sometimes modified) of the great traditional religious orders. Third Order members are an actual integral part of each particular religious order. Usually the Third Order has its own statutes and/or constitution. There are Dominican, Carmelite, Benedictine, Franciscan and I think Augustinian Third Orders…and there may be more.
If you access the website of these Orders, you usually find a link to their Third Order, sometimes called Secular Order…this will tell you all about them.
If I can be of any help, do let me know either in this thread or via PM…Blessings and my regards…Barb
Thank you for this information Barb. It is greatly appreciated. I just wonder if a Third Order would be more likely to accept someone with mental illnesses?
Hey Holly,Hi everyone. I have felt called to be a nun for some time. However, I have also been diagnosed with major depression, anxiety disorder, and borderline personality disorder (primarily a mood disorder). I have been off of my medication for over two months and I feel fine. I only got seriously depressed twice in the past month. I honestly feel like God is healing me of my mental illnesses. Is it possible that I could be called to a religious vocation?
Thanks Tietjen. I will start taking my medication again and won’t go off of it without my doctor’s approval next time. Thanks for your encouragement.Hey Holly,
As far as I know, most of the orders do not accept individuals with a history of mental illness. However, I would certainly not let that stop you from looking into it further. Perhaps the requirements for becoming a Third Order religious are more accommodating for those with both physical and/or mental illness? Your S.D. should be able to shed more light on that for you. I know that there are 3rd Order Franciscans as well as 3rd Order Carmelites. I’m sure that many other religious orders have 3rd Order members as well.
You mentioned that you hoped to become a saint. Well, the truth is that one does not need to be a nun, monk, hermit, deacon, priest or bishop to make it to Heaven. There are married persons who became saints. There are those called to be single that have become saints. And of course there are religious who have become saints. Again, I hope that you will speak to your S.D. about this. I also would hope that you will again start taking the medication that your doctor prescribed. If you had a heart condition yet woke up one day feeling good, you won’t stop taking your heart meds would you? The meds may very well be what was helping you to feel fine. If you remove them…
God bless.
Sounds great to me, Holly! My own director (prior to Father now) was a religious sister who had trained in spiritual direction. Apparently here there is some sort of course of study to qualify as a spiritual director. If your priest knows of a lady willing to work with you, then I would be confident he is placing you in good hands. No reason to suspect otherwise.Thanks for your encouragement Barb. I think the first thing I will do is contact my priest again about a spiritual director that he had lined up for me and see if that lady is still willing to work with me. I will go from there.
I think that deep down you know what your own heart is saying to you and what it is telling you to do? Certainly if I felt in anyway whatsoever, even a mere hint, I was unwell in any way at all, I would be off to my psychiatrist so fast, no one would see me for dust. I am a great advocate to follow the doctor’s advice and to seek it - but then The Lord has blest me with a really good psychiatrist. I would be very hesitant indeed to make any sort of move connected to my mental health, without seeking the advice of my doctor and talking it over well with her.
Wow! You must belong to a great parish if they recommend certain therapists. And good Catholic therapists…I dont know of a single one in South Australia. Go for it, Holly!
Good on you! As we say here in Australia, or simply “ONYA!”. This is an Aussie term of great approval and agreement.Anyway, thank you and I will not give up searching.
Quoting Holly -
Sounds great to me, Holly! My own director (prior to Father now) was a religious sister who had trained in spiritual direction. Apparently here there is some sort of course of study to qualify as a spiritual director. If your priest knows of a lady willing to work with you, then I would be confident he is placing you in good hands. No reason to suspect otherwise.
I think that deep down you know what your own heart is saying to you and what it is telling you to do? Certainly if I felt in anyway whatsoever, even a mere hint, I was unwell in any way at all, I would be off to my psychiatrist so fast, no one would see me for dust. I am a great advocate to follow the doctor’s advice and to seek it - but then The Lord has blest me with a really good psychiatrist. I would be very hesitant indeed to make any sort of move connected to my mental health, without seeking the advice of my doctor and talking it over well with her.
As I said in my previous post, there are lots of very silly notions and if one considers the facts about mental illness and suffering one, quite illogical notions about mental illness and those who suffer them. Most really need to be educated about the modern day facts connected to mental illness - but I think most even prefer their illogical notions!!! And I will be bold and say that many indeed in The Catholic Church need a proper education re mental illness. Senior Mental Health workers here, including my doctor, are really appalled at the attitudes I come up against in The Church. These attitudes mean that I need seek fulfillment and indeed mission outside of The Church structure. This is the situation I experience and stating my own personal esxperience.
Also about medication. If a doctor orders medication due to some heart problem - I would be an absolute fool not to take them. Yet if a person’s brain is either diseased or having problems (the brain is simply an organ of the body like the heart) they say all sorts of stupid things about taking medication. Rather they are the fools and cannot insight just how illogical they are being.
If I need my medication for some reason, then I reach for my medication and take it. I can suffer rather uncomfortable anxiety or panic attacks and I have medication on hand and if I need it, then I take it and am so very grateful for it.
Medication is God’s gift to mankind in our fight against disease and suffering, as is medicine generally.
You know what Hell on earth is perhaps only if you suffer a mental illness I sometimes think. So many sufferers are the unrecognized and unsung heros and saints in our midst.
Wow! You must belong to a great parish if they recommend certain therapists. And good Catholic therapists…I dont know of a single one in South Australia. Go for it, Holly!
My dear parish, God bless em, still is terrified of me…though I have not been even near ill, so sane it is painful, for quite a few years now. I have been in my parish for 27 years and still no one will stand and talk with me. Perhpas they can see two heads, and I think I only have one (that’s a joke, Holly!)
My own psychiatrist is an athiest, although she respects my own Faith and Catholic religion in every way. She also insights that it has been a major support, the major support, for me all through my life including my years travelling with serious psychotic episodes. I really respect her for that. She has near on turned me upside down at times, and I her…and I have learnt that I can trust her. And trust in a doctor/patient relationship and in a director/directee relationship is very important - nor should we give our trust to just anyone, well such is my opinion.
Good on you! As we say here in Australia, or simply “ONYA!”. This is an Aussie term of great approval and agreement.
You hold it dear and precious and true in your heart that it is The Lord you hear calling to you. In fact the translation of the word “God” means ‘the called and the calling’. I read somewhere or other. The Lord will not fail you and is full of many surprises. Well we could say "Our God of Surprises’.
Other than that, here and there you have received really sound advice in this thread, and in your heart I think you know where. If not, either ask me in this thread, or PM me.
Gods richest blessings upon you and may The Lord every hold you close and dear all your life with many rich consolations…Barb
…http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/36/36_13_4.gif…
)Hi again Holly…you can always email and ask. I have never really been drawn to a Third Order, so I have no real experience to draw on. I did go to one O.Carm Third Order Meeting (Carmelite) who did not seem flustered at the thought of Bipolar Disorder, which incidentally is the second of the two major mental illnesses - the first is Schizophrenia.Thank you for this information Barb. It is greatly appreciated. I just wonder if a Third Order would be more likely to accept someone with mental illnesses?
Also, what are some more saints who were not involved in a religious order?
I hope others may be more helpful in the interim.
Hi again Holly…you can always email and ask. I have never really been drawn to a Third Order, so I have no real experience to draw on. I did go to one O.Carm Third Order Meeting (Carmelite) who did not seem flustered at the thought of Bipolar Disorder, which incidentally is the second of the two major mental illnesses - the first is Schizophrenia.
I dont nowadays, but used to have quite a lot to do with Public Mental Health. The thing to do is if you are attracted to a Third Order and have a wander around the various traditional religious orders and their third or secular branches … and send off an email to them. I have always sighted an email point of contact on their websites.
Saints not connected to religious orders. Well firstly, there was St. Joseph - husband, parent and carpenter, Mary - wife and mother, housewife and later follower of Jesus… and Jesus - carpenter until he left home and then itinerant lay preacher and teacher:thumbsup: …
…Religious Orders did not begin to happen until the first early hundreds of years of Christianity. I think St. Benedict (Benedictines), if this memory serves me, was the first really to create a community that we would now call a religous order. Later women followed into like communities. The early Christians did tend to live in communal settings and as lay people who shared life and material goods in common…and men worked at their usual trade or occupation contributing their income.
…but I know what you mean. My brain for what it is, is starting to swtich off - it is 9.57pm. I did try to do a quick search on the internet, but cannot find a classification that lists our laity saints in that grouping. Leave it with me and I will see what I can do tomorrow. I did randomly pick a Blessed from a list of saints (hundreds of them! and I know many indeed were lay people) on Catholic Online and came up with a lay woman, and her feast day is on the way: June 9.
catholic.org/saints/saint.php?saint_id=789
I hope others may be more helpful in the interim.
Blessings and my regards - Barb
I think St. Monica were not involved in religious order, she was the mother of St. AugustineAlso, what are some more saints who were not involved in a religious order?