Could my sister be having a mid-life crisis?

  • Thread starter Thread starter JayLynn
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
J

JayLynn

Guest
My sister has always loved male attention, but has mostly kept it under control. But lately she’s been so flirty and started talking dirty in social settings in a way that would cause men to picture her in an impure way. Bragging about what she does in the bedroom, etc.

Anyway, it’s really bothering me because we live in a small town and I fear she’s ruining her reputation, which isn’t fair to her children. She’s in her mid thirties, married with kids. I’m also sad because she used to be my best friend, but she’s gotten so self absorbed and I don’t like it when she talks dirty. She seems to LOVE the attention she gets from it though so I don’t know if I can convince her to stop.

She even tried to make me feel like I wasn’t pleasing my husband enough because I’m not willing to do what she does. Her husband doesn’t seem to mind, but even if it did bother him she’s the boss in their house so I doubt he’d tell her to stop. I know she wouldn’t cheat on him, she loves him, but her ego loves people to find her hot and attractive.

My husband told me that rumours are starting to fly around town now. Should I talk to her about it or just hope this is a phase that will pass.

I’ve tried to tell her to settle down, but she laughs it off as if I’m just a prude. Should I be more direct or realize it’s not my business and I’m not her mother?
 
Sit her down and tell her to stop humiliating her children. If they have not heard, they will soon, from other kids who will hear it from their parents.
Grow up would be another thing I would say to her. Loads of people are going to tell you it’s none of your business, but the children should be considered. Children can be especially cruel. She’s playing with fire.
I’ll say a prayer for her.
 
If the sister is just being immature, then I agree with pianistclare.

However, I’d also note that hypersexuality CAN be a sign not just of a mid-life crisis but of certain mental illnesses such as bipolar disorder. That’s what I’d want to rule out first. And though this wouldn’t apply to the OP’s sister, if an older person were to suddenly start acting out sexually I’d be worried about dementia.
 
ToeInTheWater said:
If the sister is just being immature, then I agree with pianistclare.

However, I’d also note that hypersexuality CAN be a sign not just of a mid-life crisis but of certain mental illnesses such as bipolar disorder. That’s what I’d want to rule out first. And though this wouldn’t apply to the OP’s sister, if an older person were to suddenly start acting out sexually I’d be worried about dementia.
Click to expand...
Yes.
 
Your sister needs to get checked out by a medical and mental health professional. Sudden, unexplained sexual acting out-- even if just talk-- no, something is very wrong. Mental illness, something physical, or some sort of addiction-- something is happening. Especially if this is out of the blue and out of character.

Talk to her. Talk to her husband. Don’t ignore it.
 
Personally, I would just set firm boundaries that sexual talk is not welcome around you. And if she calls you a prude, leave the room. You can not tell her what to do and the person who should get her to seek medical help is her husband not her sister. And it is the husband’s job to look out for the kids
 
ToeInTheWater said:
If the sister is just being immature, then I agree with pianistclare.

However, I’d also note that hypersexuality CAN be a sign not just of a mid-life crisis but of certain mental illnesses such as bipolar disorder. That’s what I’d want to rule out first. And though this wouldn’t apply to the OP’s sister, if an older person were to suddenly start acting out sexually I’d be worried about dementia.
Click to expand...
I would be concerned both that she might have a medical issue that is affecting her thinking and that her children could be affected by this.

I would not automatically assume she’d never cheat on her husband. She sounds extremely vulnerable to make bad decisions out of a thirst for flattery. Add a little alcohol and opportunity, and you just never know. People aren’t made of iron. People with mental health issues do not make decisions in keeping with their usual character.
 
Well, you could take a humorous approach and have a few friends show up dressed as members of the police bomb squad. When your friend asks why they’re there, explain that her clock was ticking so loud that you had to call them.
 
Thank you all for your replies. I think I’ll start by saying a novena to Saint Maria Goretti for her to start with and ask the Holy Spirit to help me use the right words next time she starts acting this way. I don’t think it’s a mental health issue, like I said before she’s always loved male attention and has been a flirt before, but not quite this bad. The disappointing thing is, is that she’d really smartened up the past 6 years or so and I’d hoped she’d matured. I’m sad to see her reverting back into that behaviour again.
 
JayLynn said:
Thank you all for your replies. I think I’ll start by saying a novena to Saint Maria Goretti for her to start with and ask the Holy Spirit to help me use the right words next time she starts acting this way. I don’t think it’s a mental health issue, like I said before she’s always loved male attention and has been a flirt before, but not quite this bad. The disappointing thing is, is that she’d really smartened up the past 6 years or so and I’d hoped she’d matured. I’m sad to see her reverting back into that behaviour again.
Click to expand...
When someone exhibits a noticeable and particularly a sudden loss of a previously-attained level of inhibition, that is concerning.

I had an uncle that had a brain tumor missed because his noticeable behavior changes were written off to other things. In retrospect, he really was not right.

There is some reason your sister is showing this sudden change of behavior. Even if it is a “mid life crisis,” there is a reason for those. Sometimes, something jolts someone to realize their youth is gone and they don’t deal with it well.
 
It sounds like narcissistic personality disorder. Her husband should bring her to a doctor promptly.
 
1ke said:
Your sister needs to get checked out by a medical and mental health professional. Sudden, unexplained sexual acting out-- even if just talk-- no, something is very wrong. Mental illness, something physical, or some sort of addiction-- something is happening. Especially if this is out of the blue and out of character.

Talk to her. Talk to her husband. Don’t ignore it.
Click to expand...
I agree.
 
I would suggest that you encourage her and her husband to seek medical attention. It could be a sign of physical or mental health issues.
 
Definitely something emotional is going on with her. She needs to work on getting closer to her husband. My opinion. I am praying for her.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top