M
mommamaree
Guest
Hello all!
I am reaching the end of my neophyte year as a Catholic, and as I, with the Lord’s help, am comforming my life to His will more and more, I am experiencing what I am now convinced is spiritual attacks. During the period of time when my husband and I were taking our CCL NFP classes, as we were examining our activities and entertainment and behavior, as I made the decision to veil in Church, as I considered beginning a blog devoted to my journey - during all these times, I had such horrible inner experiences, as did my husband, and it began to affect our normally rock-solid relationship. Now we have been able to look back and identify these periods as times when we were under spiritual attack. For example, there have been times very recently when nasty curses and vile, evil words have appeared in my thoughts. This type of language and thought pattern is completely out of character for me. I am also a quite happy, content person, who doesn’t tend to be melancholy. Yet these curses, once they appeared in my thoughts, I accepted them and repeated them over and over to myself, telling myself such horrible things that are totally untrue about myself. This lasted for a bit less than 24 hours, some moments were so horrible, while others were milder. The scariest part of all was an insistent voice that was NOT my own that told me that I was so worthless that I should just end my life, no one would care. Well THAT made me sit up and pay attention! I began to consider “from what source are these vile thoughts coming?” And I began to reject what I knew to be untrue, and cling to the truth of my value and dignity in Christ.
But it really terrified me, and it terrified me even further when my husband confirmed that he has had some very similar experiences as of late. What may we do to combat this? We are new Catholics, but not new Christians. But while our childhood church affirmed the reality of spiritual warfare, my parents never spoke of this in the home, so I have no tools to do battle. I was shocked and amazed to hear Father Corapi speak once on EWTN about this reality. What can we do to arm ourselves, as we continue to go deeper into the Catholic faith and grow in the Lord?
I am reaching the end of my neophyte year as a Catholic, and as I, with the Lord’s help, am comforming my life to His will more and more, I am experiencing what I am now convinced is spiritual attacks. During the period of time when my husband and I were taking our CCL NFP classes, as we were examining our activities and entertainment and behavior, as I made the decision to veil in Church, as I considered beginning a blog devoted to my journey - during all these times, I had such horrible inner experiences, as did my husband, and it began to affect our normally rock-solid relationship. Now we have been able to look back and identify these periods as times when we were under spiritual attack. For example, there have been times very recently when nasty curses and vile, evil words have appeared in my thoughts. This type of language and thought pattern is completely out of character for me. I am also a quite happy, content person, who doesn’t tend to be melancholy. Yet these curses, once they appeared in my thoughts, I accepted them and repeated them over and over to myself, telling myself such horrible things that are totally untrue about myself. This lasted for a bit less than 24 hours, some moments were so horrible, while others were milder. The scariest part of all was an insistent voice that was NOT my own that told me that I was so worthless that I should just end my life, no one would care. Well THAT made me sit up and pay attention! I began to consider “from what source are these vile thoughts coming?” And I began to reject what I knew to be untrue, and cling to the truth of my value and dignity in Christ.
But it really terrified me, and it terrified me even further when my husband confirmed that he has had some very similar experiences as of late. What may we do to combat this? We are new Catholics, but not new Christians. But while our childhood church affirmed the reality of spiritual warfare, my parents never spoke of this in the home, so I have no tools to do battle. I was shocked and amazed to hear Father Corapi speak once on EWTN about this reality. What can we do to arm ourselves, as we continue to go deeper into the Catholic faith and grow in the Lord?