Covalidation

  • Thread starter Thread starter MrsATurner
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
M

MrsATurner

Guest
Hey everyone. I am new here and had a couple of questions about Covalidation

(If this is is the wrong place please someone feel free to move it to the correct place.)

So I was raised a Catholic was baptized and had Communion but never confirmed (I left the church at 15) After much talking to my Godmother and a lot of thinking I have decided to return to the church. I talked to the Priest on Thursday and am attending mass tomorrow and I am very happy to be back.

Anyway my husband was baptized Christian but does not go to church. His mother left the Mormon faith as a teenager and so he was taught that religions like Catholics and Mormons are a cult. He has loosened up a little bit about everything but I am still trying to talk him into the Covalidation. One of my questions is: Is there anything I can do to help try and convince him or should I try and give him a little time?

My other question is about if my husband does agree to the Covalidation. The Priest has said we can invite a few people (no more then say 20-30) to the event if we wish, How should I word the invites for those who are not Catholic to understand?
 
MrsATurner said:
Hey everyone. I am new here and had a couple of questions about Covalidation My other question is about if my husband does agree to the Covalidation. The Priest has said we can invite a few people (no more then say 20-30) to the event if we wish, How should I word the invites for those who are not Catholic to understand?
Click to expand...
it is too soon to start worrying about this, the first order of business is to meet with the priest and start the convalidation process. You actually don’t have to have any bit celebration at all, some people choose to do this after a daily morning Mass with only their witnesses present. Or you can do what you are suggesting. If most in your family are not Catholic and would not understand what is going on or why, you can skip it and simply exchange your vows in front of the priest and witnesses.

The best way to approach your husband is by explaining why you are returning to the Church, what the sacraments mean to you, and why your marriage status is keeping you away from this source of Christ’s grace. He should come with you to your meeting with the priest.

Welcome home. Be sure to let the priest know if there are others in the family in need of sacraments and religious instruction, your children for instance. He will help you prepare for confirmation as well, and your husband may attend those classes with you so he can learn more about the Church to counteract the false ideas he was given.
 
puzzleannie said:
it is too soon to start worrying about this, the first order of business is to meet with the priest and start the convalidation process. You actually don’t have to have any bit celebration at all, some people choose to do this after a daily morning Mass with only their witnesses present. Or you can do what you are suggesting. If most in your family are not Catholic and would not understand what is going on or why, you can skip it and simply exchange your vows in front of the priest and witnesses.

The best way to approach your husband is by explaining why you are returning to the Church, what the sacraments mean to you, and why your marriage status is keeping you away from this source of Christ’s grace. He should come with you to your meeting with the priest.

Welcome home. Be sure to let the priest know if there are others in the family in need of sacraments and religious instruction, your children for instance. He will help you prepare for confirmation as well, and your husband may attend those classes with you so he can learn more about the Church to counteract the false ideas he was given.
Click to expand...
I have already talked to the Priest about it. Since my husband is not Catholic, Father said all we have to do is sign the contract and do the ceremony (no classes or anything)

My family is Catholic (Most of them non-practicing though) and since my husband and I had a Civil Marriage and none of our family was able to attend we figured it would be nice to have my family and a few close friends come. I wasn’t sure if there is correct wording for the invite. Like we obviously wouldn’t said “wedding” but would we put “blessing of our marriage” or just go ahead and put “Covalidation”? My only worry would be that people might not know what a Covalidation is, My Godmother didn’t even know what it was when I first told her and shes been a Catholic longer then I’ve been alive lol.
 
you don’t have to have formal invitations, just handwritten, or even phone calls (email is a little impersonal)

John and I are having our marriage blessed by the Catholic Church at St. Mary’s in Trenton on the 4th of June at 2pm. We dearly want our family and friends to celebrate this occasion with us. We will gather at home afterward for burgers and cake. Please call and say if you can be with us. (we know the wording is not precisely accurate, but it conveys the meaning in a less confusing way)

you can discretely let the right people know that you don’t want a shower or gifts (if that is the case, but there is no reason you can’t have all the traditional wedding stuff as well, especially as you did not get to do everything the first time, you can rent a hall and do the whole nine yards, it is your day)
 
puzzleannie said:
you can discretely let the right people know that you don’t want a shower or gifts (if that is the case, but there is no reason you can’t have all the traditional wedding stuff as well, especially as you did not get to do everything the first time, you can rent a hall and do the whole nine yards, it is your day)
Click to expand...
When DH and I had our marriage convalidated, we did the “whole nine yards” thing. For us, this was a very important thing to celebrate. (We throw parties for Baptism and First Communion, so why not for having our marriage blessed in the church?) We invited our friends and family to share our day, and we treated it (almost) just like a wedding. It’s really up to you how much you want to do for the celebrating part of it.

The invites can be as formal or informal as you like. As for the wording, most people will understand what you mean if you say that you are having your marriage blessed in the church.

I would explain to your husband what the convalidation is and that you won’t be able to participate fully in the sacraments (receive the Eucharist) until your marriage is blessed in the church. If he didn’t go with you to your last meeting with the priest, I would encourage him to go with you to the next meeting with him. That way your husband can hear first hand what will happen at the ceremony and what it all means. He’ll also be able to ask questions and get an answer right away.
 
Welcome home!

My one bit of advice, is do not use the term “having our marriage blessed” as that term is very incomplete. Yes, it is a blessing however it is your actual real exchange of consent, if your husband is validly baptized it is a sacrament.

Call and say “we are inviting you to our Church Wedding” or (again, IF your priest determines that your husband was validly baptized) “we invite you to join us as we celebrate the Sacrament of Marriage”.
 
Thank you everyone for your wonderful replies!

Mini Update: Hubby seems to be warming up more and more to the idea so that is making me very happy. I prayed a rosary about it yesterday and today he seems a lot more accepting. Like I expected him to be upset today when I came home from Mass but instead he wrapped his arms around me and told me he loves me. I was so happy.

Anyway I know a few said I don’t have to do formal invites. The reason I want to do the formal invites is because I already have an idea for what I wanna do I just wasn’t sure what correct wording is for it simply because “Covalidation” is not a common word.

BTW just in case your wondering this is my idea for my invites. Hubby and I have a black and white laser jet printer. So I was going to make invites on Photoshop and print them. Since we don’t have any cardstock and I am trying to not spend money I decided to print the invites on the backs of scrapbook paper (which I have tons of) That way each invite will be unique. The envelopes will either be made out of scrapbook paper or I will print something from the internet. Since everyone who will be invited is going to be local I plan on hand delivering the invites so I don’t have to worry about postage.
 
MrsATurner said:
Thank you everyone for your wonderful replies!

Mini Update: Hubby seems to be warming up more and more to the idea so that is making me very happy. I prayed a rosary about it yesterday and today he seems a lot more accepting. Like I expected him to be upset today when I came home from Mass but instead he wrapped his arms around me and told me he loves me. I was so happy.

Anyway I know a few said I don’t have to do formal invites. The reason I want to do the formal invites is because I already have an idea for what I wanna do I just wasn’t sure what correct wording is for it simply because “Covalidation” is not a common word.

BTW just in case your wondering this is my idea for my invites. Hubby and I have a black and white laser jet printer. So I was going to make invites on Photoshop and print them. Since we don’t have any cardstock and I am trying to not spend money I decided to print the invites on the backs of scrapbook paper (which I have tons of) That way each invite will be unique. The envelopes will either be made out of scrapbook paper or I will print something from the internet. Since everyone who will be invited is going to be local I plan on hand delivering the invites so I don’t have to worry about postage.
Click to expand...
Sounds very nice. God bless. If for some reason he will not do the convalidation you may be able to explore the avenue of radical sanitation but it does sound as if there is hope for the convalidation. God bless.
 
MrsATurner said:
Thank you everyone for your wonderful replies!

Mini Update: Hubby seems to be warming up more and more to the idea so that is making me very happy. I prayed a rosary about it yesterday and today he seems a lot more accepting. Like I expected him to be upset today when I came home from Mass but instead he wrapped his arms around me and told me he loves me. I was so happy.

Anyway I know a few said I don’t have to do formal invites. The reason I want to do the formal invites is because I already have an idea for what I wanna do I just wasn’t sure what correct wording is for it simply because “Covalidation” is not a common word.

BTW just in case your wondering this is my idea for my invites. Hubby and I have a black and white laser jet printer. So I was going to make invites on Photoshop and print them. Since we don’t have any cardstock and I am trying to not spend money I decided to print the invites on the backs of scrapbook paper (which I have tons of) That way each invite will be unique. The envelopes will either be made out of scrapbook paper or I will print something from the internet. Since everyone who will be invited is going to be local I plan on hand delivering the invites so I don’t have to worry about postage.
Click to expand...
Actually the term is “Convalidation.”

🙂

I’m excited for you! I hope you have a lovely ceremony.
 
"Please share our joy as we exchange vows before God.

Saturday blah at blah AM

St. Elsewhere Catholic Church

Reception to Follow"
 
Congratulations on your upcoming convalidation! My husband and I had our marriage convalidated last year, prior to his being brought into the church as Easter vigil.

I’ve heard of every sort of celebration from very lavish to very intimate. We had ours on a Saturday, after vigil mass with about a dozen friends and family present. We went back to our house for cake and champagne.
 
MrsATurner said:
BTW just in case your wondering this is my idea for my invites. Hubby and I have a black and white laser jet printer. So I was going to make invites on Photoshop and print them. Since we don’t have any cardstock and I am trying to not spend money I decided to print the invites on the backs of scrapbook paper (which I have tons of) That way each invite will be unique. The envelopes will either be made out of scrapbook paper or I will print something from the internet. Since everyone who will be invited is going to be local I plan on hand delivering the invites so I don’t have to worry about postage.
Click to expand...
this sounds beautiful and creative
the wording from poster above is good

John and Mary invite you to celebrate with them the sacrament of matrimony at St. Mary Catholic Church …
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top