Cradle, convert and sibling rivalry

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I have noticed since joining the Catholic Church that the vast majority of Catholics have welcomed me and other converts with open arms. However there is an occasional undertone of resentment I sense. I have noticed an anti-protestant note in many threads; not anti-protestant theology, rather anti-protestant anything.(e.g “We don’t need anything that is from Evangelicals, Fundamentalist, Pentecostals, etc.”)

The story of the prodigal son, which has many messages, is brought to mind. In addition to the prodigal son and the forgiving father, you have the resentful older son. What makes him so believable is how truly he shows our self-centered human nature. I would never wish to imply that any group is pharisaical (older son-ish) and we all must be tolerant and understanding of others. But, do any of you cradle Catholics feel resentful toward us newcomers, much like the elder brother? Have any of the converts out there ran into any negativism based on your background? Any other comments?
 
I haven’t found negativity as much as an attitude of expectation. I converted early and because of the circumstances of my conversion, for a time it seemed that everyone around me expected something incredible as the next step. Personally, I have always felt that the ‘something incredible’ would be to just be faithful.

A conversation with a couple of priests went along that Line. They told my why they felt that I would make a great priest someday. Their reasons were along the lines of “having a greak love for Christ and His Church”, “Knowing my faith”, “Being an example to ______” … My response to them was, “That is what will make me a good Catholic, if I can live that.”

I almost feel that the expectation is that every convert is a potential Hahn. I would rather that the attitude be that every Cathoic is a potential Saint.
 
I for one do not feel any sense of resentment. Quite oppositely, I feel that the passion brought into our parish by the catacumens is energizing. I wish that some of the “cradles” in mass shared the same enthusiasm that the catacums have. They just might possibly want to have the same joy that you feel. I like your analogy by the way. Plese don’t let anyone steal your happiness.

Anyway, welcome home pnewton.

YBIC,
David
 
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pnewton:
But, do any of you cradle Catholics feel resentful toward us newcomers, much like the elder brother?
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Not me! I know so many people who are Catholic because they were “born Catholic” that I just love to see people actively choosing to belong to the Church. Welcome.

Ellen
 
I am a cradle Catholic, and have no resentment of converts (lucky for me – I’m sure my bride would not remain with me if I resented her 😛 ). Or at least, I wouldn’t call what I feel resentment.

However I do bear a cross that I call “The Prodigal Brother Syndrome”. It goes like this: I am a cradle Catholic. I have always been a Catholic. I did not convert. I did not fall away during high school or college. I’ve never gone through a period where I stopped practicing the faith. I have never had a need to “revert”. I have always been here. I do not resent converts nor reverts. But I am jealous of them.

I have no conversion experience. I have no story to tell. I have always been here. I have no single period in my life to point to and say “And that’s why I’m a Catholic”

It is “almost” enough to make me want to leave, just so I could come back with a story (But dont worry – I could *never * bring myself to abandon what I know to be The Truth).

I am not resentful, but I am jealous. Jealous that the converts and reverts have something that I don’t see how I can ever have.

(And I know, since many have told me so, that converts and reverts may be likewise jealous of me, for the continuous history that they can never have)

To bear my cross of the Prodigal Brother, among my daily devotions I pray:

"All that the Father has is mine –
Thank you, Father, for granting me my needs and more."
 
tee_eff_em,

Thank you for your post. Your story is moving and wonderful.

By no means should you be jealous and keep the faith, you may get to fall away yet! (only kidding).
 
Pnewton,

First let me say that it grieves me that you’ve experienced some resentment.

I’m a cradle Catholic, though I probably could be called a revert since I strayed away for many years. I have no feelings of resentment towards converts—quite the opposite, as I appreciate those who come to the Faith after a search for Truth led them there. I admire the courage it obviously takes to cut ties and loyalty to other religious traditions, especially when conversion earns the anger and suspicion of former colleagues and friends, as it sometimes does. Like a previous poster, I wish more cradle Catholics shared the enthusiasm that I see in converts. Most Catholics these days are poorly taught, so a convert that has gone through a good RCIA program is probably better informed about our Faith than many cradle Catholics.

Tee-eff-em,

What a terrific post. As one of those reverts who left only to belatedly discover what had been left behind, I admire your stability, your peace, and your strength. No need to feel jealous of dummies like me…
 
I have never felt any resentment nor have I really sensed it by other cradle catholics other than on one or two anti-Hahn threads. This stuff is hard for me to understand. My experience has been that converts often make the best catholics. And by the way, I have learned a great deal from my evangelical friends. Admittedly, little of what I have learned from them is of a doctrinal nature because they do not share catholic beliefs, but they bring a great love of the Lord and scripture that has at times helped to wake me out of a spiritual slumber.
 
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Sherlock:
Pnewton,

Tee-eff-em,

What a terrific post. As one of those reverts who left only to belatedly discover what had been left behind, I admire your stability, your peace, and your strength. No need to feel jealous of dummies like me…
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ditto
 
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tee_eff_em:
I have no conversion experience. I have no story to tell. I have always been here. I have no single period in my life to point to and say “And that’s why I’m a Catholic”

To bear my cross of the Prodigal Brother, among my daily devotions I pray:

"All that the Father has is mine –
Thank you, Father, for granting me my needs and more."
Click to expand...
I also used to think that because I didn’t have some wake up conversion experience that my story did not have value. However, the story for you is your spiritual growth. You have certainly not always been at the same point in your Catholic life as you are now. There were sacraments that affected you in a personal way, growth spurts in response to challenges, people who touched your life, and other events of particular meaning. Sharing your story helps others grow.

I like your prayer.

Ellen
 
I am a cradle Catholic, and I feel many of us don’t have the same appreciation for the faith, because we were “born” in to it. I took for granted what we do, and for a long time, just went through the motions, not really ever understanding the meanings behind them. I think converts are especially blessed, because they have the newest knowledge and appreciation for a faith that is beautiful in its experience and in its teachings.

I thank the Hahns, because they have, through their books, given me a real understanding and greater love of Catholicism. It’s too bad you’ve experienced some “snobbery,” but know that Christ smiles on you for your conversion, and the fact you hold it sacred. I think we should all become converts - see the faith anew.

I have questioned my parents about things I have studied recently, and have found that, although they have attended Catholic school, and have been Catholics their entire life; they just don’t know their faith. (Yes, of course, the basics, but not truly what we should all know).

Maybe there’s some things you can teach us “cradle” Catholics.
 
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tee_eff_em:
I’ve never gone through a period where I stopped practicing the faith. I have never had a need to “revert”. I have always been here. I do not resent converts nor reverts. But I am jealous of them.
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I am a revert, one who had fallen away around high school and stayed that way for 25+ years, and I’ve been jealous of those who have never fallen away! And to go one step further, I even feel the Protestant converts have so much more biblical knowledge and know so much more about being Catholic when they convert than I do, that I’m almost embarrassed and envious. At least the protestants were on the journey the whole time, finally arriving at the one true Church. Some of us spent our lives not even making the effort.

I’m grateful for my conversion experience and for what I assume will be a lifelong conversion (I mean it never really ends right?), but I still wish I had never turned my back on God and had never fallen away from the Church.

JELane
 
I have never felt any resentment nor have I really sensed it by other cradle catholics other than on one or two anti-Hahn threads.

I was one individual who initiated what are described as anti-Hahn threads. It appears brilliant orthodox Catholics such as Fr. John Hardon can be supplanted as authorities and one ought be sanguine about that while one ought be castigated for daring to criticise any unwise action or novelty introduced by either of the Hahns.

That is an interesting phenomenon.

Just for the record, I am grateful, not resentful, for converts. My wife isa convert. But, remember the example of Saul. He had to go through a conversion experience, be catechised by the nascent Catholic Church, have his blindness cured , andnd spend some time before appearing publicly as an expert in the Faith.
 
Ellen Marie:
Not me! I know so many people who are Catholic because they were “born Catholic” that I just love to see people actively choosing to belong to the Church. Welcome.

Ellen
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Amen to that! We have some great converts in our parish. Better still…They can sing! 😃 The cradle Catholic’s (the one’s on fire that is) have much to offer converts and vice versa. God is building a great and faithful generation using everyone’s talent in various ways. Catholic is Catholic with a capital “C”. Convert is a small “c”. It is the big “C” that counts.

Both of my Uncles (who were brothers and married my Aunts) were converts. Our family and myself especially were greatly blessed to have them in our family and our faith lives.
 
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pnewton:
I have noticed since joining the Catholic Church that the vast majority of Catholics have welcomed me and other converts with open arms. However there is an occasional undertone of resentment I sense. I have noticed an anti-protestant note in many threads; not anti-protestant theology, rather anti-protestant anything.(e.g “We don’t need anything that is from Evangelicals, Fundamentalist, Pentecostals, etc.”)

The story of the prodigal son, which has many messages, is brought to mind. In addition to the prodigal son and the forgiving father, you have the resentful older son. What makes him so believable is how truly he shows our self-centered human nature. I would never wish to imply that any group is pharisaical (older son-ish) and we all must be tolerant and understanding of others. But, do any of you cradle Catholics feel resentful toward us newcomers, much like the elder brother? Have any of the converts out there ran into any negativism based on your background? Any other comments?
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I have to agree with you here I do feel resentments sometimes against Protestants and I never agree with that. We are all brothers and sisters in Christ.

I love your statement about the prodigal son too. Here in the Dutch translation it is called “The lost son” and it is one of my favourites. There is so much in that story. I once even thought who was really lost here. The prodigal son who came back to his loving father or the resentfull, jealous son. And who would I be in that story…

Emmy
 
NO-ONE are perfect!

I’m a convert. But most of all I’m a catholic. I think the best we can do is to realize that this world will never be perfect. We will have to wait for Heaven to find everything perfect.

It is not easy to be a convert. But it is easy to feel selfpity. The best cure for that is to pray for every one in our church.

God Bless!

G.G.
 
IMO, converts make the best Catholics. They bring a renewed sense of evangelization that is sorely needed in the Church today. God bless you all!

Peace.
 
Catholicguy said:
I have never felt any resentment nor have I really sensed it by other cradle catholics other than on one or two anti-Hahn threads.

I was one individual who initiated what are described as anti-Hahn threads. …But, remember the example of Saul. He had to go through a conversion experience, be catechised by the nascent Catholic Church, have his blindness cured , andnd spend some time before appearing publicly as an expert in the Faith.
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Thank you for the response and clarification. Yes, your thread was one that I noticed. You have an excellent point as to the conversion of St. Paul. He himself endorsed that offices of Church leadership should not be given to those new to the faith, lest they swell with pride. It is an humbling experience to go from positions of leadership in one’s denomination to a student in an RCIA class, but it is also a very good experience.
 
I really haven’t noticed any antagonism towards myself from cradles. When i converted i had many of them welcoming me. The nominally Catholic at my high school look at me as sort of inspiration, they realized they too should get involved. I love my newfound faith, a faith that has found me, not I it. I have no feelings of resentment towards cradles, although sometimes i wish i too could have been brought up and baptized Catholic. But i am glad nonetheless.
 
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