Crazy Dreams or what?

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I have been praying a lot concerning my journey towards conversion to RC. I have made no final decision yet but am leaning heavily towards conversion. My issue here is extreme anxiety and weird dreams (every night). I wake up choking and in a panic for no apparent reason. I am very confused and my mind races a mile a minute most of the time. What is going on with me? Has anyone else contemplating conversion experienced the same type of crazy dreams or nightmares? I started praying the rosary but not correctly. I do what I can and I know that I am not doing it correctly yet, can this cause mojo’s or is this just an overactive imagination on my part? Oh, I am also an ordained Christian minister (no denomination, just Christian). I know that will have to go if I convert and I can live with that. I no longer accept the statement of faith (not 100%) of the ministry that ordained me, could this be part of my nightmare issue as well? I could sure use your prayers, you are a great bunch of people and I appreciate all of you. God Bless!
 
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SavedByFaith:
… I started praying the rosary but not correctly. I do what I can and I know that I am not doing it correctly yet, can this cause mojo’s or is this just an overactive imagination on my part? …
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I’m no expert, but I’m pretty sure you can’t get mojo’s from saying the rosary wrong! That’s a good idea to pray it. You can pick up a rosary guide at church, or find one online.

I’m praying for you.

Peace.
 
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SavedByFaith:
I have been praying a lot concerning my journey towards conversion to RC. I have made no final decision yet but am leaning heavily towards conversion. My issue here is extreme anxiety and weird dreams (every night). I wake up choking and in a panic for no apparent reason. I am very confused and my mind races a mile a minute most of the time. What is going on with me? Has anyone else contemplating conversion experienced the same type of crazy dreams or nightmares? I started praying the rosary but not correctly. I do what I can and I know that I am not doing it correctly yet, can this cause mojo’s or is this just an overactive imagination on my part? Oh, I am also an ordained Christian minister (no denomination, just Christian). I know that will have to go if I convert and I can live with that. I no longer accept the statement of faith (not 100%) of the ministry that ordained me, could this be part of my nightmare issue as well? I could sure use your prayers, you are a great bunch of people and I appreciate all of you. God Bless!
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You must understand that since your a minister some of your church might follow you to Holy Mother Church,you maybe insighting the enemy,and going through a little harrasment.There is a ministry faithful to the Pope and magesterium wh deals with spiritual warfare.You can tell them what is going on and they can help you,whatever the cause is.God Bless,I’ll PM the sight to you:)
 
You are not alone… I too had some crazy dreams about conversion! Actually, it was a few years later when I actually realized what Catholism and stood for! Basically my dream was this “thing” was coming after me and I was scared :eek: ! I started screaming and crying the Hail Mary (attempting to say the Rosary, but I too was just learning it). And the “thing” vanished!! 😃 But I kept having the dream over and over again that night (sometimes the monster was after my children, too - I kept getting up to make sure they were still okay) but the rosary/Hail Mary always won out!! I haven’t had that dream since! Thank you Mary!!!
 
I am delighted to read your posting. I have been going through similar issues for over three years. As my faith and prayer life increased the intensity and chrismatic value of these types of dreams intensified.

Perhaps my capstone “dream” was a guided imagery revelation courtesy of my guardian angel in which he revealed that the evil spirits only enter with his concurence. The angel allowed me to witness an evil spirit conducting my dream. When the evil spirit realized he was being observed, he was shocked and fled immediatly. My guardian angel also revealed that he is dissappointed in me when I don’t keep his weapons armed (via prayer, sacraments, fasting, scripture study, charity, etc.).

I’ve come to bless all such dreams as gifts from God. Yes, I believe evil spirits are after you and they are already hitting you as hard as they can - you survived didn’t you? But evil spirits are after all God’s children who seek their own salvation or the salvation of others. You and I have just been blessed to see them.

Many people including clergy think of the “unseen” things God has created as merely abstract concepts. But when one sees and fights them they become more than abstractions - they are true entities. Knowing that the enemy is real increases the intensity of your desire to choose good over evil. Once you have seen the literal ugliness of evil, rejecting its inwared pull and overcoming its outward temptation is easier.

Realize that all children of God are protected by guardain angels. Your protection from God will always be sufficient to withstand the assult from the enemy. God sometimes lets the evil in because you need to learn or grow. Discern using prayer, scripture, and study of the life of the saints.

Also realize that the mystical body of Christ, of which all baptized Christians are members, has authority over evil. You cannot combat evil spirits by your own merits or strength - you are exponential out gunned. Fighting evil must be done in unity with the body of Christ. The mystical body of Christ vanquishes demons from my presence when I pray the Lord’s prayer. Several times I have heard choirs of voices joining with me in this holy communal prayer. The best way to fight evil is according to the orthodox means of your professed Christian faith. The problem is that once you get outside the Catholic Church the meaning of “orthodox” becomes very ambiguous.

By the way all this “crazy stuff” started for me soon after very extensive psychological evaluations sponsored by the dioceses (prior to acceptance to diaconate formation). The many test found no psycholocial issues. My craziness instantaneously developed coincident with my prayers in which I asked the Lord to use me as His servent, to cure me of all sin, and to mold me to conform totally to His holy will.

May God continue to bless you on your journey. I’ll be glad to talk the next time I dial in (maybe weekly).
 
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Lisa4Catholics:
You must understand that since your a minister some of your church might follow you to Holy Mother Church
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I did not explain properly, sorry. I am an ordained minister - not a pastor. I am an insurance broker (full time, self-employed). I am a minister but have no church. I was called by God to something about a year ago and I felt that it was some type of part time voluntary ministry (homeless, prison, hospital, etc) so I sought ordination. It is possible that at that time I was being called to the Catholic Church instead and I misread the calling. I operate something of an internet ministry that obviously needs rethinking due to the fact that many things have become very clear to me recently (last 3-4 months) since I started studying the RC faith. My internet ministry does not align with these new convictions. Maybe what I am experiencing is inner turmoil as a result of all of the changes in my theology and whatnot. Anyway, I have no church that I am endangering in Satan’s eyes. He only risks losing me, possibly my family and anyone else that I may someday bring about a change in (which granted may still be a considerable number of people). My main concern is that the turmoil and bad dreams/anxiety be from satan trying to stop me (which I can handle through Christ who strengthens me) and not some sign that I am straying from God’s will in my life. You must understand that I have never been Catholic so I would naturally assume that this may be a sign that I am going astray by converting to the RC faith. Your prayers are appreciated!
 
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SavedByFaith:
I have been praying a lot concerning my journey towards conversion to RC. I have made no final decision yet but am leaning heavily towards conversion. My issue here is extreme anxiety and weird dreams (every night).
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You maybe under a spiritual attack, about the Rosary, I usually say it on the recommended days.
Joyful Mysteries (Mon/Sat)

Sorrowful Mysteries (Tues/Fri)

Glorious Mysteries (Wed/Sun)

http://freecitywebpages.com/rosary/new.gifLuminous Mysteries (Thurs)http://freecitywebpages.com/rosary/new.gif

Also the Chaplet of Divine Mercy, and the prayers on this link from time to time. home.att.net/~eucharistic/Binding.html

Rosary diagram ainglkiss.com/ros/krdia.htm
 
Saved,

May the peace of the Lord be with you. We are praying for you. A lot of what you are feeling is anxiety over nothing. A lot of what “IF” is running through your mind. You know as well as the rest of us who is planting the seeds of doubt and unrest in your mind. Don’t let him win! If you convert, God Bless you. If you don’t convert, God Bless you. Either way, God bless you!

I recommend you look into RCIA at your local Catholic Parish. It is non-commital. If nothing more, you will get a better understanding of the Catholic Faith.
 
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dhgray:
If you convert, God Bless you. If you don’t convert, God Bless you. Either way, God bless you!
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But is it not true that by RC doctrinal beliefs - I MUST convert - or risk loss of my soul and eternal separation from God?
 
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SavedByFaith:
But is it not true that by RC doctrinal beliefs - I MUST convert - or risk loss of my soul and eternal separation from God?
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Two things come to mind, John 3:16 said (who so ever) and God judges the heart.

Have you asked the Lord about being a Catholic in the actual Catholic Church?

-D
 
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Darrel:
Have you asked the Lord about being a Catholic in the actual Catholic Church?
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I have asked, I continue to ask and will continue to ask and wait… The only answer that I have so far is “wait” and so I wait. Lord God, give me patience to wait!
 
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SavedByFaith:
I have asked, I continue to ask and will continue to ask and wait… The only answer that I have so far is “wait” and so I wait. Lord God, give me patience to wait!
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Nice 🙂

An answer like that seems to leave very little to fear. I can tell you for certain that in my case it all changed when the Lord showed me truth of the Eucharist. But I could also tell that the timing was all his after so many years and so many questions.

-D
 
SavedByFaith, May Holy Michael the Archangel come to you and defend you in battle, be your safeguard against the wickedness and snares of the devil. May God rebuke him we humbly pray. By the power of God cast into hell Satan and all the evil spirits that roam the world seeking to ruin all souls. Amen

NewDeacon wrote something important! "Many people including clergy think of the “unseen” things God has created as merely abstract concepts. But when one sees and fights them they become more than abstractions - they are true entities. Knowing that the enemy is real increases the intensity of your desire to choose good over evil. Once you have seen the literal ugliness of evil, rejecting its inwared pull and overcoming its outward temptation is easier.

Realize that all children of God are protected by guardain angels. Your protection from God will always be sufficient to withstand the assult from the enemy. God sometimes lets the evil in because you need to learn or grow. Discern using prayer, scripture, and study of the life of the saints.
Every fight you survive will make you, just like Padre Pio, stronger. Keep your weapons handy. The evil ones do want to keep men from the True Church. The ones most attacked are the brand new Catholics and the acolytes. Please use this address. It is Padre Pio’s (a Saint) site. Look at bottom of each page, select the next topic. The Padre was attacked very often. He was strong.
padrepio.catholicwebservices.com/ENGLISH/Guardian_Angel.htm
 
A friend of mine recommended this site to me today if you’re interested in checking it out. It’s geared towards pastors looking at Catholic conversion along with everyone else.

chnetwork.org/

-D
 
Your choking episodes could be only due to psychological anxiety and not be supernatural in their original. However, I attempt to discern everything “seen” (natural) and “unseen” (supernatural) under the light of the Lord’s past (scripture and tradition) and on-going (faith seeking understanding) revelation. Although no revelation necessary for salvation of all has been revealed by God since the death of the last apostle, the Lord continues to reveal things particularly necessary for the salvation of individuals (one or more). In your case whether or not the source of your choking and panic is natural or supernatural the message from God is the same. Perhaps you are not doing something that at least at a subconscious level you are called to do. The Holy Spirit speaks to the subconscious when the conscious cannot or chooses not to hear.

God is infinitely patient with us if we are trying to follow Him. He allows us time to discern and helps us to discern correctly. I concur with a previous recommendation that suggested that you consider looking into an RCIA program at a Catholic Church. I assist teaching these and over the years have seen a few people “sneak” into to these. Unlike most fundamentalist denominations, Catholics, in general, are very low pressure. I think at the root of this low pressure is that we know that the Holy Spirit does the work and that we only assists via love and gentle nudges. However, if you think that this is too bold of a step, then I recommend you read the Catechism the Catholic Church cover to cover. I recommend buying the book but you can find it free on-line in multiple locations (here is one http://www.scborromeo.org/ccc.htm).

Also the fact that you have been mysteriously called (by divine prompting?) to the Rosary speaks volumes to me in light of RC tradition. Mary is the first earthly Tabernacle (tabernacles contain the Eucharist, the body of Christ). Also Mary is a fulfillment of the Ark of the Covenant, which prefigured the tabernacle (Ark of the new Covenant). Roman Catholics place exponentially more emphasis on the Holy Eucharist than any other faith. There is also much theology around Mary being symbolic for the Catholic Church.

If your choking incidents are supernatural in origin they may escalate to include more things depending on what the Lord wants to reveal to you. I found the Spiritual Warfare forum on the following site to be orthodox and helpful http://www.saint-mike.org/. I find it very paradoxical that the devil because of his over eagerness to abuse us ends up doing the Lord’s bidding whenever he pesters those called to higher holiness by God.

I prayed for you and Wednesday and I will do so again.
 
I’ve been in RCIA for a while now. Going to mass. Plus I go to bible study. I’m still not baptized.

There are nightmares that come. Especially if I’ve been sinning. Prayer really helps prevent it. Sometimes (only a few) I’ve woken up from sleep praying: “Lord Jesus, son of God, have mercy on us”. One of the first prayers I learned.

There are far more worse things that have tormented me since I’ve began my journey. Just keep looking at the positive. When those things come and try to convince you your wrong, and ESPECIALLY the ones who tell you not to be catholic, just remember the good. Cause the good (Jesus)…is VERY good. Everybody I talk to has some sort of comment about the catholic church, especially other christians.

Above all things, hope in Jesus. Everything will be fine. Love him with all your heart, and all your soul, and remember to love your neighbor as you love yourself.
 
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