Cremation

[PJD1987]

Hello,

I asked this question to one of the Apologists awhile back, but I can’t seem to get it answered so I thought I’d open a thread. Forgive me if this is in the wrong place, I thought this was the closest subject to open up the topic in.

My mother recently explained to me her wishes for after she passes and has decided she wants to be cremated and then have her ashes strewn on a river near her childhood home. My understanding is that the church teaching is that cremation is not encouraged, but if one chooses to be cremated it’s alright if the remains are then interred. The scattering of ashes, in my understanding, is not allowed. I’ve always been of the mind that you must respect the wishes of the dead, but what should I do when those wishes depart from Church teaching?

Any thoughts or suggestions would be greatly appreciated, thank you in advance.

God bless,
Paul

 

[1ke]

My understanding is that the church teaching is that cremation is not encouraged, but if one chooses to be cremated it’s alright if the remains are then interred. The scattering of ashes, in my understanding, is not allowed. I’ve always been of the mind that you must respect the wishes of the dead, but what should I do when those wishes depart from Church teaching?

You are correct, cremated remains must be interred.

Regarding people’s “wishes” either living or dead, you can honor them insofar as they do not contravene the moral or canon law. These “wishes” cannot be honored as they violate Church law.

 

[TheMc]

I’ve always been of the mind that you must respect the wishes of the dead, but what should I do when those wishes depart from Church teaching?

Listen to the church teaching. Would you listen to the wishes of the dead if they told you to go shoot your neighbor? This example is kinda crazy, but it illustrates the point: If a dying person asked you to do something wrong, you don’t have an excuse to do it.

 

[rick43235]

My mother recently explained to me her wishes for after she passes and has decided she wants to be cremated and then have her ashes strewn on a river near her childhood home. My understanding is that the church teaching is that cremation is not encouraged, but if one chooses to be cremated it’s alright if the remains are then interred. The scattering of ashes, in my understanding, is not allowed. I’ve always been of the mind that you must respect the wishes of the dead, but what should I do when those wishes depart from Church.

Is your mother Catholic?

 

[CountrySteve]

well this is a rock in a hard place personally if i was you i would sit down and discuss with your mom and tell her the Church teachings and how you can honor her wishes but also ask her if there’s another way you could honor her after she passes away like instead of spreading the ashes bury them next to the river

 

[TheMc]

well this is a rock in a hard place personally if i was you i would sit down and discuss with your mom and tell her the Church teachings and how you can honor her wishes but also ask her if there’s another way you could honor her after she passes away like instead of spreading the ashes bury them next to the river

But shouldn’t they be buried in a cemetery? Frankly, if you know you will be planning the funeral, I wouldn’t even bring it up to her. Just do it right.

 

[PJD1987]

My mother is what I refer to as culturally Catholic, she grew up Catholic but does not go to Mass regularly or the sacraments. I figured the Church teaching takes precedent, but, as I’m sure you will understand…its difficult to disregard the wishes of your mother, but in the end I know I should follow the church, its just a difficult situation.

 

[puzzleannie]

what she proposes is also illegal in civil law in most places, scattering the remains, that is. Cremation is allowed if it does not indicate the deceased refused to believe in the resurrection of the body, although it is not preferred. If you are the next of kin you will make the funeral arrangements. Rather than start an argument about her, spend the time you have with her gently, in charity, helping her to return to the sacraments. The best way to do this is by your own life as a faithful Catholic.

 

[PJD1987]

what she proposes is also illegal in civil law in most places, scattering the remains, that is. Cremation is allowed if it does not indicate the deceased refused to believe in the resurrection of the body, although it is not preferred. If you are the next of kin you will make the funeral arrangements. Rather than start an argument about her, spend the time you have with her gently, in charity, helping her to return to the sacraments. The best way to do this is by your own life as a faithful Catholic.

I try to be a good example and be.a witness to the faith, so far its been to no avail, unfortunately, but St. Monica prayed for her son for decades so I take courage from that!