Crossed Arms in Holy Communion line

[BSHoop96]

For 17 years, I was a non-Catholic coming to Mass, because I found it attractive. I was going to daily Mass, and after Mass one day, the regular priest at that parish invited me to come forward for a blessing during Holy Communion - until he made the invitation, I was not even aware of the custom.

I guess after seventeen years he gave up on you going thru the whole process so that you could come up for Communion as a Catholic? Or maybe he was helping to ease you into it? That brings up a whole new question, which I understand if you don’t want to answer on here, but why in the world would someone who went to a Catholic church for seventeen years, including daily Mass not become a Catholic?? Especially if you wanted to “feel” more included.

I accepted the invitation because it made me feel more included. It didn’t occur to me to doubt that he had the authority to make the invitation.

I never questioned his authority to do so. Sorry if you thought that I did. As I have repeatedly said, my own priest says he would never refuse a blessing to someone but made it clear to me how he felt *when I asked *and that was that it was a Communion line, not a blessing line, and the practice was not started by the Church. My husband no longer goes up but others do. My priest blesses them.

 

[jmcrae]

I guess after seventeen years he gave up on you going thru the whole process so that you could come up for Communion as a Catholic?

Actually, I think at that particular point in time it had been seven or eight years.

Or maybe he was helping to ease you into it? That brings up a whole new question, which I understand if you don’t want to answer on here, but why in the world would someone who went to a Catholic church for seventeen years, including daily Mass not become a Catholic?? Especially if you wanted to “feel” more included.

Because at the time, my husband and my parents were vehemently opposed to my conversion, and the priest agreed that from a pastoral point of view, it would be better to wait, rather than harm my marriage or my relationship with my parents.

After my grandmother’s death, their attitude softened, and I was able to convert the following year.

 

[mullenpm]

Let me ask?

When you are in line to receive the Holy Eucharist do you look around at the congregation to see who is not in line? I do not believe that anyone does this, so those who have a mortal sin on their soul, or any other reason for not being able to receive, it is their guilty conscience that is bothering them, not the opinion of others.

And, doesn’t it really call attention to the fact that you cannot receive the Holy Eucharist by going in the Communion line with your arms crossed. That is the noticeable action that everyone sees, not staying in your pew and praying for help with your specific problem.

 

[HoosierGal]

Actually, I think at that particular point in time it had been seven or eight years.

Because at the time, my husband and my parents were vehemently opposed to my conversion, and the priest agreed that from a pastoral point of view, it would be better to wait, rather than harm my marriage or my relationship with my parents.

After my grandmother’s death, their attitude softened, and I was able to convert the following year.

Wow, I greatly admire your patience and sensitivity.

 

[HoosierGal]

Let me ask?

When you are in line to receive the Holy Eucharist do you look around at the congregation to see who is not in line? I do not believe that anyone does this, so those who have a mortal sin on their soul, or any other reason for not being able to receive, it is their guilty conscience that is bothering them, not the opinion of others.

And, doesn’t it really call attention to the fact that you cannot receive the Holy Eucharist by going in the Communion line with your arms crossed. That is the noticeable action that everyone sees, not staying in your pew and praying for help with your specific problem.

When I was in RCIA, there were times when I went to an entire Mass (such as holy days of obligation). When I stayed in the pew, people did notice. Once an older lady in the pew behind me kept glaring at me and made me feel like she thought I was evil. Other times people were noticeably annoyed when they had to crawl over me to get out of the pew to receive (and I’m a small person!). So I started going up to get a blessing instead of staying in the pew and I really liked it better. I’m sure some people noticed I was not receiving, but its hard to feel unloved when getting a blessing.

 

[mullenpm]

Well, Hoosier Gal, I am deeply sorry that you had such an experience; the people you mentioned should not have been going to Holy Communion because they appeared to not be in the State of Grace. They were the evil thinkers.

It would never occur to me to glare at anyone not going to Communion. I do think though that this was an extraordinary occurrence (at least I hope it was). :heaven:

 

[BSHoop96]

Actually, I think at that particular point in time it had been seven or eight years.

Because at the time, my husband and my parents were vehemently opposed to my conversion, and the priest agreed that from a pastoral point of view, it would be better to wait, rather than harm my marriage or my relationship with my parents.

After my grandmother’s death, their attitude softened, and I was able to convert the following year.

Sounds like you have a wise priest. Thanks for sharing that. Interesting. It can be a very touchy situation. Have you ever heard the saying “people hate what they think the Catholic church is.”

My husband is converting from a AofG background and he was so surprised at the misinformation he had heard all his life. The last thing he ever thought he would be was Catholic but it fits him like a glove.

Oh well, off topic. I am happy for you.

 

[BSHoop96]

When I was in RCIA, there were times when I went to an entire Mass (such as holy days of obligation). When I stayed in the pew, people did notice. Once an older lady in the pew behind me kept glaring at me and made me feel like she thought I was evil. Other times people were noticeably annoyed when they had to crawl over me to get out of the pew to receive (and I’m a small person!). So I started going up to get a blessing instead of staying in the pew and I really liked it better. I’m sure some people noticed I was not receiving, but its hard to feel unloved when getting a blessing.

But you do get that blessing…at the end of Mass. And who knows why a lady was glaring…maybe she really wasn’t. Maybe it wasn’t directed at you. Maybe it had nothing to do with you not going up to Communion. In any case Hoosier, it was her problem. Don’t let your own insecurities make you vulnerable. And if it really is other people…shame on them!

Just for anyone else dealing with the problem of people stepping over them, here’s a tip. Try to arrive early enough to sit at the end of a pew. If they empty out from your end…step out & back (next to the side of pew) and extend your hand…as in please go ahead…to the person next to you. Then you step back in after that row empties. If you are at the other end and you don’t follow your row out, when they come back you just step out and back and let them all in and then step back in. If you’re in the middle, improvise.

 

[jmcrae]

When I was in RCIA, there were times when I went to an entire Mass (such as holy days of obligation). When I stayed in the pew, people did notice. Once an older lady in the pew behind me kept glaring at me and made me feel like she thought I was evil.

Next time someone does this to you, just ask them, “Is there something I can help you with?” It will open them up to let you know what their real problem is, and if it seems necessary, you can explain to them what it is that you are doing - or else you can help them find their lost contact lens, or whatever turns out to be the actual problem.

 

[a_cermak]

Not to be unkind but you can be a Catholic married to a non-Catholic and still receive communion. At long as any previous marriages were annulled and they had a dispensation to marry. If they did not they should have gone to the priest and he would have started the proper paperwork. Leaving the church because you are worried that people are wondering what kind of sinner your are indicates another problem altogether. As many posters have pointed out there are many valid reasons why one might not be going up for Communion.

In her case, the irregular marriage was that her husband had been married previously, and there really was no hope of an annulment. Not all these marriage situations can be fixed by paperwork and I don’t know a lot of people who are going to separate or live like a brother and sister, particularly when they have children.

I do know that she tended to be a little more sensitive about emotional things than maybe a lot of people. She felt jammed between not going up to receive and feeling the judgement of her fellow mass goers or going up to receive when not in a state of grace. A third option might have suited her situation.

 

[gavanhe]

An odd thread, my first thoughts concerned the fact of people crossing their arms whilst in the line (seen quite frequently at my church), receiving communion in the hand and then walking back to the pew with their arms once more crossed.
Wholly irreverent and obviously improperly disposed!!
Gerry

 

[Pro_Domina]

An odd thread, my first thoughts concerned the fact of people crossing their arms whilst in the line (seen quite frequently at my church), receiving communion in the hand and then walking back to the pew with their arms once more crossed.
Wholly irreverent and obviously improperly disposed!!
Gerry

I agree with everything except with having my arms cross before receiving. What is wrong with that?
Sure the external postures indicate an interior conviction, but uh that is no square deal.

 

[Aramis]

An odd thread, my first thoughts concerned the fact of people crossing their arms whilst in the line (seen quite frequently at my church), receiving communion in the hand and then walking back to the pew with their arms once more crossed.
Wholly irreverent and obviously improperly disposed!!
Gerry

Or, possibly, just Byzantines, Maronites, or other Eastern Catholics.

 

[Pro_Domina]

Or, possibly, just Byzantines, Maronites, or other Eastern Catholics.

Someone sounds touchy.

Giving indirects is so much fun isn’t it?

 

[jmcrae]

Someone sounds touchy.

Giving indirects is so much fun isn’t it?

No - I think he just meant that people from those traditions (they, too, are in full communion with the Catholic Church alongside us who belong to the Latin Rite) traditionally make the sign of love (crossed arms) before and after receiving the Eucharist.

 

[gavanhe]

My apologies to all those whom I confused with my cultural confusion as in crossed arms and folded arms. Crossing and folding arms is used interchangeably.
I now realise my error. In my previous post where I said crossed, it should have read folded.
Gerry

 

[Aramis]

My apologies to all those whom I confused with my cultural confusion as in crossed arms and folded arms. Crossing and folding arms is used interchangeably.
I now realise my error. In my previous post where I said crossed, it should have read folded.
Gerry

That DOES make a difference.

If the arms are held such that they form an X across the chest, much like the subdeacon’s stole in the byzantine usage, then that is just normative for many Eastern Catholics…

If, on the other hand, they are more like an equal sign (=), that’s a different matter. Not the height of irreverence, but definitely not a good posture, either.

Crossed can mean either. Folded generally can’t…

Even in Roman parishes, I stand in line, arms crossed across my chest in an X, until about two or three back from the minister (extraordinary or ordinary) of Holy Communion, then bring my hands down to avoid confusing them.

 

[geraldffff]

That DOES make a difference.
: If the arms are held such that they form an X across the chest, much like the subdeacon’s stole in the byzantine usage, then that is just normative for many Eastern Catholics…

If, on the other hand, they are more like an equal sign (=), that’s a different matter. Not the height of irreverence, but definitely not a good posture, either.

Crossed can mean either. Folded generally can’t…

Even in Roman parishes, I stand in line, arms crossed across my chest in an X, until about two or three back from the minister (extraordinary or ordinary) of Holy Communion, then bring my hands down to avoid confusing them.

From another thread by( thereseozi) I’ve been reading the posts, in the different forums, where people are arguing over how to receive Holy Communion and it breaks my heart to see this. I’m even afraid to comment for fear that I will be attacked since it’s happened before. Why fellow Catholics do this to each other, and treat each other uncharitably, I don’t know. But anyways, I wanted to share the following information:

This excerpt is from the book, " 7 Secrets of the Eucharist " by Vinny Flynn; Introduction by Fr. Mitch Pacwa, S.J.; published by MercySong, Inc. in collaboration with Ignatius Press, pg. 12-13:

"Pope Benedict XVI also discusses this issue of how to receive, emphasizing that, instead of arguing about whether it’s better to receive kneeling or standing, in the hand or on the tongue, we need to focus on the spirit of reverence with which the early Fathers of the Church received Communion.

"First urging priests to ‘exercise tolerance and to recognize the decision of each person,’ he goes on to ask everyone ‘to exercise the same tolerance and not to cast aspersions on anyone who may have opted for this or that way of doing it.’ What is important is reverence:

“It is quite wrong to argue about this or that form of behavior. We should be concerned only to argue in favor of…a reverence in the heart, an inner submission before the mystery of God.”

Notes, Sources and References, page 111-112:

" ‘It is quite wrong to argue about this or that form of behavior.’ Pope Benedict XVI, God is Near Us, p. 71. The pope goes on to urge that instead of arguing about the outer forms or rituals of receiving Communion, we 'should be concerned only to argue in favor of a ‘reverence in the heart, an inner submission before the mystery of God who puts himself into our hands.’

“He admonishes us ‘not to forget that not only our hands are impure but also our tongue and also our heart and that we often sin more with the tongue than with our hands.’ He explains that, by coming to us in Communion, ‘God takes an enormous risk…allowing not only our hand and our tongue but even our heart to come into contact with him. We see this in the Lord’s willingness to enter into us and live with us, within us, and to become from within the heart of our life and the agent of its transformation’ (p.71)”

 

[gavanhe]

From another thread by( thereseozi) I’ve been reading the posts, in the different forums, where people are arguing over how to receive Holy Communion and it breaks my heart to see this. I’m even afraid to comment for fear that I will be attacked since it’s happened before. Why fellow Catholics do this to each other, and treat each other uncharitably, I don’t know. But anyways, I wanted to share the following information:

I agree that we don’t know a persons inner disposition, but it is generally allowed that your posture (read body language) is a good indicator of inner disposition.
I don’t see a problem with raising the issue of peoples outward behaviour and gently admonishing/correcting that behaviour, else any behaviour or bad habit will eventually become acceptable.
We need to encourage devout reverence for Our Lord.
Gerry

 

[anon52328184]

i have seen a couple of posts where people say they receive communion twice a day. i am a new catholic of less than 2 weeks. i asked my priest last week if we are allowed to take holy communion twice a day and he said it is not recommended unless the second time is a special circumstance such as a wedding.
also 10 years ago when i was thinking of becoming a catholic and was visiting churches, i was told that i could cross my arms to go up and receive a blessing. once when i reached the priest he almost seemed offended and i explained that i was episcopalian and not catholic. he wanted to continue to give me the eucharist, but i left without a blessing. i don’t think Jesus minds if we aren’t perfect in the communion line or the way we receive the eucharist. i think to Jesus what matters is that we showed up!!