Crying Plastic Baby at Mass

[Orionthehunter]

1. The parents of the OP can write a note stating that they would not allow their student to bring the “baby” to mass on a religious exemption.
   If I were this person’s mother, that’s what I would do. It would make a point to the teacher that although the assignment is very important, it is also unreasonable to assign a “father” without a “mother”. Normally, we have nine months to think about how we are going to handle such situations.

The OP voluntarily took this class. Rather than his mommy writing him a note, the OP needs to accept the consequences of not fulfilling the obligations of the class or fulfill the obligations.

I recall in the early 80’s when I was in college I took a persuasive speech class. One of the assignments was for us to draw a subject out a hat and then prepare a persuasive speech in opposition to how we felt. Anyway, one of my classmates drew out the topic of the Israeli invasion of Lebanon (yes it happened 20 some years ago too). She was a religious pacifist. So, after classes she went to our Prof and told him that she couldn’t morally argue that Israel was justified to invade Lebanon and asked for another topic. He told her to argue it or take a zero.

At first, she and everyone was incensed that he would take that hard a stance. So, the Prof told the class that we are all going to be faced with moral dilemma’s in our job. And, a test of our integrity was whether we were willing to suffer for our ideals or if they were just something we talked about living up to but ran for the hills when faced with them in real life.

In the end, my friend accepted her zero with a quiet confidence and comfort that she had stood up for her principles. And, she became a better more valued friend to me because of her example.

For this reason, I go back to the stance that the OP either needs

1. To live up to the requirements of the class and find an solution that allows him to attend Mass, or
2. Not attend Mass and satisfy the requirements of the class, or
3. Not live up the the requirements of hte class and face the consequences with integrity, or
4. Not live up to the requirements of the class and lie to the teacher with regard to his performance of the expectations.

Life is about choices. Getting a note from mommy is not what aspiring adults do.

 

[daeve]

For this reason, I go back to the stance that the OP either needs

1. To live up to the requirements of the class and find an solution that allows him to attend Mass, or
2. Not attend Mass and satisfy the requirements of the class, or
3. Not live up the the requirements of hte class and face the consequences with integrity, or
4. Not live up to the requirements of the class and lie to the teacher with regard to his performance of the expectations.

Life is about choices. Getting a note from mommy is not what aspiring adults do.

#1 is the best option, if it’s possible. I understand what you’re saying about not going to his parents, stand on your own feet, etc. That makes sense. But it’s very important – more than very, critical – that he attends Mass. I don’t recall any mention in the previous posts about whether babysitting is allowed. We also don’t know how old OP is, just that he’s a student. A kid in middle school still needs some parental intervention at times. In high school, it would depend on the kid, and on the teacher. If he can’t work it out himself, his parents are there to guide him, to help him. That’s what parents do. So far, they seem to have given him a good start. A lot of other kids would look at this as an excuse to skip church.

Life is full of difficulties, but in this case, not attending Mass because you have to take care of a doll is not an option. Not to a Catholic. This young man appears to be devout and sincere about his faith. He wants to go to Mass and he NEEDS to go to Mass. Staying home with a real baby is a different situation.

 

[wannabee]

I’m surprised that no one has actually spotted that the whole idea of this is to make kids realise that having a child is a 24 hour a day 7 days a wekk 52 weeks a year job.

It’s intended to make them face up to the reality of life with a child - and you can’t say to your child - " sorry dear - I can’t have you tomorrow morning I’m going to Mass - I’ll try and find a sitter for you "

 

[Orionthehunter]

#1 is the best option, if it’s possible. I understand what you’re saying about not going to his parents, stand on your own feet, etc. That makes sense. But it’s very important – more than very, critical – that he attends Mass. I don’t recall any mention in the previous posts about whether babysitting is allowed. We also don’t know how old OP is, just that he’s a student. A kid in middle school still needs some parental intervention at times. In high school, it would depend on the kid, and on the teacher. If he can’t work it out himself, his parents are there to guide him, to help him. That’s what parents do. So far, they seem to have given him a good start. A lot of other kids would look at this as an excuse to skip church.

Life is full of difficulties, but in this case, not attending Mass because you have to take care of a doll is not an option. Not to a Catholic. This young man appears to be devout and sincere about his faith. He wants to go to Mass and he NEEDS to go to Mass. Staying home with a real baby is a different situation.

I agree. I said this in an earlier post on what I think the OP needs to do. My list was only to tell him the choices.

"I agree w/ everyone who says that you can’t miss Mass over this and it isn’t fair to everyone else to tolerate a disruption of a plastic doll mostly because they wouldn’t understand what is going on. "

 

[netmilsmom]

The OP voluntarily took this class. Rather than his mommy writing him a note, the OP needs to accept the consequences of not fulfilling the obligations of the class or fulfill the obligations.

Life is about choices. Getting a note from mommy is not what aspiring adults do.

The condesending “Mommy” is unwarranted.
The OP did not give his age nor did he state that he voluntarily took this class. I am going on the assumption that he is High School or younger. You are assuming College. Maybe both of us should not be assuming.
His parent is there to support him. The idea that a parent should not be involved is ridiculous if the OP is in High School. In that case, a High School teacher is not going to take the word of the student without parental backup.

No, a note from a parent is not what adults do. It’s what administrations in High School expect.

As I said, a real Catholic baby would have two parents who had nine months to prepare for this. It may not always be this way but should be. No one is given a baby “poof” without warning. This crying plastic baby was.

 

[netmilsmom]

I’m surprised that no one has actually spotted that the whole idea of this is to make kids realise that having a child is a 24 hour a day 7 days a wekk 52 weeks a year job.

It’s intended to make them face up to the reality of life with a child - and you can’t say to your child - " sorry dear - I can’t have you tomorrow morning I’m going to Mass - I’ll try and find a sitter for you "

No, but if you know that you have the obligation of a child coming within nine months, you won’t sign up to serve with a baby will you?
That is the missing factor, time to prepare.

 

[Orionthehunter]

The condesending “Mommy” is unwarranted.
The OP did not give his age nor did he state that he voluntarily took this class. I am going on the assumption that he is High School or younger. You are assuming College. Maybe both of us should not be assuming.
His parent is there to support him. The idea that a parent should not be involved is ridiculous if the OP is in High School. In that case, a High School teacher is not going to take the word of the student without parental backup.

No, a note from a parent is not what adults do. It’s what administrations in High School expect.

As I said, a real Catholic baby would have two parents who had nine months to prepare for this. It may not always be this way but should be. No one is given a baby “poof” without warning. This crying plastic baby was.

I’m surprised that no one has actually spotted that the whole idea of this is to make kids realise that having a child is a 24 hour a day 7 days a wekk 52 weeks a year job.

It’s intended to make them face up to the reality of life with a child - and you can’t say to your child - " sorry dear - I can’t have you tomorrow morning I’m going to Mass - I’ll try and find a sitter for you "

I apologize for the use of mommy. It wasn’t kosher.

At the same time, it is a requirement for the class. And like Wannabe said, the class is about learning about responsibility of having a child is a 24/7 responsibility. Exempting them from the hardships defeats the purpose of the class. And on something as important as this, I’d make them suffer the hardship and find an adult solution to this. Just a difference in parenting styles I guess.

 

[SMHW]

I’m surprised that no one has actually spotted that the whole idea of this is to make kids realise that having a child is a 24 hour a day 7 days a wekk 52 weeks a year job.

It’s intended to make them face up to the reality of life with a child - and you can’t say to your child - " sorry dear - I can’t have you tomorrow morning I’m going to Mass - I’ll try and find a sitter for you "

I think we are very much aware of the point of the class. Some of us consider it a valuable lesson. Some of us aren’t so sure.

But no matter how valuable the class and its lessons, they are less important than the OP’s responsibility to attend Mass. The fact that the teacher expects the OP to treat the doll as if it were a real baby does not create the responsibity on the part of the OP to do so—at least as far as Mass is concerned.

Parents with real live babies have to figure out each Sunday if they will miss Mass to care for the child, take the child to Mass, take turns attending Mass while the other cares for the child, or get someone to care for the child while the parents attend Mass. (Yes, you sometimes can get a babysitter in order to attend Mass.) A single parent obviously has less options than one with a spouse.

Now this particular poster has responsibilities at Mass above and beyond mere attendance. It’s possible that he ought to give up those extra responsibilities for this particular weekend if doing so makes it possible for him to meet both his Mass attendance and ‘childcare’ responsibilities.

I would tend to say that the lesson of the doll is very evident to this particular poster regardless of what he decides to do.

 

[netmilsmom]

I apologize for the use of mommy. It wasn’t kosher.

At the same time, it is a requirement for the class. And like Wannabe said, the class is about learning about responsibility of having a child is a 24/7 responsibility. Exempting them from the hardships defeats the purpose of the class. And on something as important as this, I’d make them suffer the hardship and find an adult solution to this. Just a difference in parenting styles I guess.

Actually, I agree with you on the responsibility point. My first suggestion to the OP was to get a “sitter”.

However, barring that (let’s say his mother, sister or pseudo babysitter is not available). The question from the OP was whether to take the “baby” to the Holy Mass he was serving. Even to give it to another kid. The answer to that was NO.

He would not be able to take a real baby on the altar nor would he (should he) consider that just anyone could watch it. With a real baby, he probably wouldn’t have obligated to serve or would have a wife.

If the baby could not be “watched” while serving, that is where the parent of the OP should step in to explain the situation.

Or homeschool!

 

[dessert]

I wasn’t assigned a wife. Second my teacher is a Methodist with some Catholic knowledge. I was thinking of paying our organist’s daughter to watch the baby during Mass.

Also some people in my class joked that I should “baptize” the baby.

I am so sorry you are in this situation. She is probably trying to teach you is that babies need a set schedule which maybe is already program into the doll if it has a chip or something like you said the teacher indicated. The doll will more than likely be on a set feeding and sleeping scedule and maybe sensitive to hot or cold or being treated roughly. Hopefully it won’t be oversensitive to loud noise. They want you to think of it as real and hope to foster in to you some nuturing skills I guess of which we learn by watching our parents or others watching children? Haven’t you had any? They don’t want you to have an out of sight out of mind attitude and you seem senstive because you are concerned hoow much trouble it will cause. You morre than likely get a good grade especially if it comes back in one piece without any missing arms or legs, can you trust the organists daughter? Do they want you to make a diary of every thing that happened and the nap times etc.? Please be sure to give the doll a bath and remember it may have electonic parts to to be sensitive to hot or cold water or being tossed around Just bring it baack in NOT the clothes it came hoome in and don’t you have a mother or father to help you out in this situatio? I hope all goes wll and you have my prayers! Baptizing is not a joke. Did you give the doll name?
return from the desert

 

[Damascus]

I’m surprised that no one has actually spotted that the whole idea of this is to make kids realise that having a child is a 24 hour a day 7 days a wekk 52 weeks a year job.

It’s intended to make them face up to the reality of life with a child - and you can’t say to your child - " sorry dear - I can’t have you tomorrow morning I’m going to Mass - I’ll try and find a sitter for you "

But with a real child you have real stuff in the diaper and you have real earaches and fevers and visits to the doctor and all sorts of things…
like the REAL MONEy its going to cost for the clothes diapers food medicine blah blah toys you name it. Has half this students earnings gone to any of the plastic babys care? strollers pack n plays swings you name it!
Yes I see the point of this doll. Its not going to prepare you for a darn thing.

 

[Seatuck]

Can’t you get someone else to serve the weekend you have the doll? You say you don’t have to serve. I don’t really see what the problem is.But then I attend an NO Mass. If you are embarrassed to be holding a doll then offer it up. You’ll gain graces for it. Offer your discomfort for the suffering souls in purgatory or some other intention.

My daughter had Baby Think it Over for an assignment a couple of weekends ago. She stood in the narthex of the church with the other parents with unruly children so she wouldn’t disturb anyone with the crying or distract anyone because she was a 14 year old with a doll in church.Of course the doll did not cry anyway. Grr. As it turned out we distracted people anyway because we were the only people kneeling at the appropriate times in the mass. Go Figure.
My daughter did her assignment . She took the baby everywhere she went. Parties , class, sports . Everywhere.

 

[CathMass]

Thank you to everyone who answered my thread. I have spoken with the teacher and she doesn’t have a problem with my mother watching the doll for an hour.

Aa far as bringing it to Mass, I really worry about disrupting the silence of the Tridentine atmosphere and perhaps angering traditionalists. So it has been decided to let my mom who goes to another Mass to watch the baby for an hour.

 

[CatholicNick]

Aa far as bringing it to Mass, I really worry about disrupting the silence of the Tridentine atmosphere and perhaps angering traditionalists. So it has been decided to let my mom who goes to another Mass to watch the baby for an hour.

Shouldn’t worry about angering traditionalists at the Mass, were just normal Catholics like you. Nobody is perfect. You should concentrate fully on the unfolding Sacrifice of Calvary and not what the people in the pew’s think of you.

I think what you decided about the plastic baby however, was the most prudent course of action. Bottom line is, it isn’t real, and if it would have disrupted the Holy Sacrifice in any way, it would have been unnecessary disruption. If the baby were real however, that would have obviously changed the situation.

Nick.

 

[daeve]

Shouldn’t worry about angering traditionalists at the Mass, were just normal Catholics like you. Nobody is perfect. You should concentrate fully on the unfolding Sacrifice of Calvary and not what the people in the pew’s think of you.

I think what you decided about the plastic baby however, was the most prudent course of action. Bottom line is, it isn’t real, and if it would have disrupted the Holy Sacrifice in any way, it would have been unnecessary disruption. If the baby were real however, that would have obviously changed the situation.

Nick.

I agree this is the best solution. And Nick’s right…it’s not a real baby and shouldn’t disrupt any Mass, Tridentine or NO. There are plenty of real babies at Mass without a wailing doll.

OP, I think you behaved prudently, and very maturely about this. You have learned from this exercise. I hope you get a good grade. Deb

 

[Deo_adiuvante_2]

I once knew someone who had to bring one of those dolls to Mass and I’m sure it was a distraction. It’s one thing if it is a real baby, but otherwise, it is an unnecessary distraction.

 

[ridesawhitehors]

New sign at the entrance to the chapel… “Please turn off all cell phones, pagers, and electronic babies”.
Maybe they should have a vibrate setting on the baby?