I think it’s could be wrong to adapt changes that go against your own conscience or go against the majority of moral and/or mature society.
For example:
- I think it’s wrong for little girls to wear shorts so short that the bottom of their butt cheeks are slipping out of each leg. However, I can accept shorter shorts if the top is modest. Or a less modest top if the pants are modest. But often, what happens is that BOTH the shirt and top are not modest.
- I feel it’s wrong for young girls (under 17) to dress in a provocative way as to become attractive to 30 year old men. We should be able to look at a 13-17 year old girl and tell that she’s between 13-17. We shouldn’t be mistaking them for a 22 year old.
- I feel it’s wrong for young girls (or boys) to dress like they are going to a rave when going to the mall.
I think men and women need to actually speak to one another. Girls should be taught not to wear things which cause boys/men to sin AND boys should be taught to keep custody of their eyes. But society really needs to have both. For if girls dress modestly but boys have no custody or their eyes, they will still find ways to objectify women/girls. But if all boys learn custody of their eyes, but all girls dress provocatively, then boys/men won’t even be able to look at a women. Can’t have one without the other. Good male friends will be truthful with you.
A rule of thumb, if you wouldn’t want one of the following to see the way you are dressed, then chances are you are not dressed modestly: mom, dad, a grandparent, great-grandparent, aunt/uncle, friend of your parents, employer, boyfriend’s mom, your priest, your Bishop, etc.
Another rule of thumb, if you object to your little sister or a young 12 year old child wearing it, then chances are it might not be modest (I’m not talking about dresses or female suits).
While it’s wrong to judge a book by it’s cover; we all do it. You never get a 2nd chance to make a first impression. You never know when someone might see you on the street or in the mall and think you look like a “slut” or “slacker” and then interview you for a job the next day.
Now, if a girl is dressed modestly, and a boy/man still objectifies her, then the sin is totally his. Scandal only comes into play if that boy/man would not have sinned had the girl been dressed modestly (men can also be dressed in a way that scandalizes women too).
Finally, the tough part is how to figure out if your are dressed modestly or not. It’s subjective. So the key is not to base it off your own subjectiveness, but that of normal mature society (like up above). I think if a man is scandalized by seeing your ankles, that’s his problem, unless of course you showed your ankles on purpose to scandalize him because you knew. But if a man feels scandalized because you are wearing tight shorts with you butt cheeks hanging out, a low cut top with your bra and most of your breast showing from the front, no leaves so we can see most of breasts from the side, no back so we can see your entire back and bra, and that the shirt is white, mostly see though so we can see your black bra (or no bra)… then I think most of society would agree that you are dressed provocatively.
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I hope this is helpful.