Dating a Non-Catholic

[Julianna]

It leaves me kind of wondering why you dated her in the first place knowing she was of a different faith than you? And the light comes on a year and a half later?

My mother is Baptist, my father Catholic, they were married in the Catholic Church in 1956. My mother never converted. It was she who saw to it that my siblings and I went through our sacraments and sometimes helped us with CCD. She learned alot…and what she learned was the Catholic faith is rich in history and rites and all the things she heard about it were wrong. She never converted. My parents were married close to 50 years until dad passed away in 06. My mother loved my father enough to raise us Catholic. She also showed us aspects of her faith and we grew up know that we are on the same journey but tread different paths…

I find it odd that you are tossing her aside at this point especially after you all have been intimate. I wish well in your search for the perfect virginal Catholic girl…if you live in the USA…good luck with that dream.

 

[rusty20]

It leaves me kind of wondering why you dated her in the first place knowing she was of a different faith than you? And the light comes on a year and a half later?

My mother is Baptist, my father Catholic, they were married in the Catholic Church in 1956. My mother never converted. It was she who saw to it that my siblings and I went through our sacraments and sometimes helped us with CCD. She learned alot…and what she learned was the Catholic faith is rich in history and rites and all the things she heard about it were wrong. She never converted. My parents were married close to 50 years until dad passed away in 06. My mother loved my father enough to raise us Catholic. She also showed us aspects of her faith and we grew up know that we are on the same journey but tread different paths…

I find it odd that you are tossing her aside at this point especially after you all have been intimate. I wish well in your search for the perfect virginal Catholic girl…if you live in the USA…good luck with that dream.

ummm, thanks?

if you don’t realize what a conversion of faith is, then i can’t help you understand my reasons for my actions…

 

[Salonika]

First I am sorry you about your dilemma – you are clearly going through a difficult time where it must seem to you that whatever choices you make, people including you, are likely to get hurt. I think you should be congratulated for grappling with the issue now, not waiting until you graduate. Maybe you should have grappled more with it earlier but I am great believer that we do not really deal with an issue until it becomes top priority, when we are ready to deal with it or a precipitating event occurs.

Started reading other replies and decided to stop as I started debating with the posters instead of considering your dilemma. In other words my focus was changing from your dilemma to their responses.

I think that differences in views in a relationship add spice but I also think that we all have different abilities to deal with large differences and to do so over a long time. Given the limitations of a forum such as these (eg can’t see your body language) I get the feeling that it isn’t if, but when, you have a serious discussion with your current girlfriend about your relationship. For me, it would be worse to learn that someone had not discussed their serious doubts about our relationship, than to learn of them.

Another thought – does your current girlfriend know about your involvement in this Forum? If so, is she likely to access it eg to find out the more about Catholicism and perhaps find this thread and work out her situation is being described. Finding such a thread would be a relationship breaker for me, partly because I would see it as a breach of privacy but more so because it contained information I didn’t know and would think I should have known.

Also think that “shoulds” get us into a lot of trouble. I should have a Catholic girlfriend, if my girlfriend isn’t Catholic, I should be able to make the relationship work, if I get a Catholic girlfriend all should be well. I can get very stubborn to prove myself competent in achieiving “shoulds” and forget if what I am being stubborn about is really important or relevant.

Also please remember that our responses are likely to tell you more about us, our beliefs and how we would (like to think we would) handle such situation. So read all postings with this in mind. Consider what’s said, who’s said it, where they come from and take on what is appropriate for you.

Suggest you get someone to talk to who is outside the situation - like a counsellor off campus.

 

[Armenian_cpa]

Grace is correct.

Look at yourself. Are you sure you are not keeping this poor girl around to satisfy your needs?

A man would end this immediately instead of keeping the gf around until Ms Perfect comes along.

Be an adult and not be selfish. This poor woman is going to be hurt bad enough. If you really care about her why lead her on any longer?