Dating a Protestant pastor

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I’ve been dating a non denominational bible Christian Protestant pastor. I knew him before he was a pastor and he has changed his life around and went to a jimmy swaggart bible college and his family started a church and asked him to pastor it. Now my question is I am a practicing Catholic and I attend mass every Sunday me and my daughters. And after mass I will go to his church as a support and listen to him preach. I no longer let my children attend the other kids because they where told that non Christians (Catholics) would not be raptured, as they believe in a pre trib rapture. Also one asked my daughter how she knew so much and she said well I’m catholic and she was told you mean you where a catholic your a Christian now? And my daughter told her no I’m a catholic Christian! And she asked her so you haven’t left the church yet? And my daughter told her I will never leave the church. She also told her the reason she knows so much is because we read the same book (bible) lol little smart allec humor of my twelve year old. Anyway am I wrong for attending there service after mass? I don’t allow my children to learn from them nor do I accept some of there dogma which I am not afraid to say so. Though they may have a similar foundation in Christ, they lack much on many other issues. This hasn’t exactly drove a wedge in between my relationship as I am very stern about not leaving my catholic faith, but it has made rocky ground for me and his family because sometimes they can be anti catholic. I tell him all the time preach the gospel but don’t be anti catholic, we are trying to find a common ground because I told him he would have to marry me I’m the church so I can keep my sacraments. But I think he prays for my conversion. Am I in for one?
 
Mreyrey said:
I’ve been dating a non denominational bible Christian Protestant pastor. I knew him before he was a pastor and he has changed his life around and went to a jimmy swaggart bible college and his family started a church and asked him to pastor it. Now my question is I am a practicing Catholic and I attend mass every Sunday me and my daughters. And after mass I will go to his church as a support and listen to him preach. I no longer let my children attend the other kids because they where told that non Christians (Catholics) would not be raptured, as they believe in a pre trib rapture. Also one asked my daughter how she knew so much and she said well I’m catholic and she was told you mean you where a catholic your a Christian now? And my daughter told her no I’m a catholic Christian! And she asked her so you haven’t left the church yet? And my daughter told her I will never leave the church. She also told her the reason she knows so much is because we read the same book (bible) lol little smart allec humor of my twelve year old. Anyway am I wrong for attending there service after mass? I don’t allow my children to learn from them nor do I accept some of there dogma which I am not afraid to say so. Though they may have a similar foundation in Christ, they lack much on many other issues. This hasn’t exactly drove a wedge in between my relationship as I am very stern about not leaving my catholic faith, but it has made rocky ground for me and his family because sometimes they can be anti catholic. I tell him all the time preach the gospel but don’t be anti catholic, we are trying to find a common ground because I told him he would have to marry me I’m the church so I can keep my sacraments. But I think he prays for my conversion. Am I in for one?
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I’m going to tell you an answer you don’t want to hear.

If your faith has its place in your life that it should, break off this relationship.

If you marry this fellow, he will (rightly) claim his authority to be the spiritual head of your household, and he WILL impose his beliefs on you and your family. Your children will be exposed to an atmosphere of confusion, and, despite your probably not seeing it today, conflict.

Find a faithful Catholic man strong in his faith. Such creatures DO exist.
 
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Well your right on he is a devout Christian compared to allot of catholic men I know, his love for Christ is one of the things that drew me to him and his prayer life, I’m more concerned about his family, it feels like they are always trying to convert me or my kids with little things. Like his mom asked me have you seen left behind? The movie I knew exactly why she wanted me to watch it I just kind of responded no I think jenkins and lahay are wormwood and I don’t really like their work. By the look on her face I don’t even think she knows where her own dogma came from, she probably thought I was talking about the directors of the movie because she didn’t say anything
 
I hate to say it, but I fear this will eventually be a cause of great stress for you.

Graduates (and faculty) of Jimmy Swagget Bible College believe strongly that Catholics are not Christians.

Tim Staples of Catholic Answers has discussed this extensively, as he went to school there. He was dating a girl there who eventually left him when it became apparent that he was becoming Catholic and would never change his mind.

I suggest you purchased this CD or MP3


I fear that you boyfriend will eventually only stay with you if you leave the Church. Even if that’s not his will, eventually, he may feel pressure from his congregation.

You might be better off by attending his Church because you MIGHT be sending him mixed messages. In otherwords, as long as you attend his church, he will have hope that you might convert.

As someone who is in an intrafaith marriage, I know first hand the headaches, stress, and frankly heartbreak it causes.

I suggest you strongly pray on this, and I wish you all the best.

God Bless
 
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I married a Protestant. It is a long, hard spiritual road. Separate churches on Sunday. Disagreements over the baptizing of the children. Do not go into this with rose colored glasses, it’s doable, but not easy. Fortunately after 13 years of marriage my spouse went through RCIA and became Catholic. But your man would have to give up his job in order to convert.

And stop going to any Protestant services, you don’t think they are influencing you but they are. I understand you want to show support, but does he go to Mass to show you and your children support in your faith? Or is this “support” a one way street? Just things to consider. Also, if he is a Protestant worth his salt he will most likely continue and even ramp up his “evangelizing” to you. That has been my experience.
 
I am aware of this, I had no intentions on this relationship going like this. And I am more then willing to break it off if i have to compromise my faith. But he’s never asked me to. It’s his family that is the reason I know I cannot marry him at this time. Although he has stood up for me to them and told them especially when it comes to my kids they cannot speak against Catholicism to us. He knows I will leave him for that reason, he’s even said I never cared to learn about Catholicism the only reason I care about it now is because your in it. I’ve told him and even given him books explaining the mass that it is all biblical. He really does respect my faith. But his family not so much.
 
If you marry him you will be a protestant pastor’s wife. As such certain things will be expected of you. Having grown up in a non denominational protestant church I can attest to the fact that the pastor’s wives were often very involved in the ministry. Would you be able to balance your responsibilities as the pastor’s wife while also holding on to your beliefs? I also don’t see his congregation looking kindly on you as a Catholic, they would probably expect you to convert as he does. If he wasn’t the pastor your relationship might stand a chance but as it is I just don’t see it working well. Have you talked to your priest about this yet?
 
Mreyrey said:
I am aware of this, I had no intentions on this relationship going like this. And I am more then willing to break it off if i have to compromise my faith. But he’s never asked me to. It’s his family that is the reason I know I cannot marry him at this time. Although he has stood up for me to them and told them especially when it comes to my kids they cannot speak against Catholicism to us. He knows I will leave him for that reason, he’s even said I never cared to learn about Catholicism the only reason I care about it now is because your in it. I’ve told him and even given him books explaining the mass that it is all biblical. He really does respect my faith. But his family not so much.
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Nice! Maybe get him some Dr Scott Hahn and Steve Ray books for starters.

Also, I highly suggest FORMED.org. The Symbolon series on there would be great for him.

God Bless and Good Luck
 
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Sorry, I misread your post. It’s not him but his family…

I have friction with my in-laws, and it does cause some strife in our marriage, but we are able to work through it.

Pray and consult a priest.
 
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I have talked to my priest. He’s been very supportive of my feelings as I’ve told him I cannot leave my sacraments. He told me well if he’s along the lines of Pentecostal it’s not so bad the Holy Spirit is bringing you to confession lol but my priest did say he is more then willing to talk to him basically pastor to pastor on what is expected of my faith in the church, also any questions he may have. My priest doesn’t seem concerned because he sees how devout I am. He’s more then willing to even talk to him on my behalf. He knows I’m not going anywhere.
 
Not at all that’s why I’m here asking I want to hear every ones opinion good and bad, this is how you gain perspective and thank you for your response.
 
A pastor to pastor conversation would probably be helpful to both of you. The two of you should talk also about what he envisions your “future” role in his church to be. (Should you get married.)
 
If I were you, I’d go over to the forums at the Coming Home Network. Talk to pastors, their wives, who have converted. Understand what sort of a life you are signing up for.
 
Expose him to Dr. David Anders of Called to Communion (EWTN). He studied at Wheaton and then after doing research realized the truth and became a Catholic. His story is very interesting!
 
Mreyrey said:
I am aware of this, I had no intentions on this relationship going like this. And I am more then willing to break it off if i have to compromise my faith. But he’s never asked me to. It’s his family that is the reason I know I cannot marry him at this time. Although he has stood up for me to them and told them especially when it comes to my kids they cannot speak against Catholicism to us. He knows I will leave him for that reason, he’s even said I never cared to learn about Catholicism the only reason I care about it now is because your in it. I’ve told him and even given him books explaining the mass that it is all biblical. He really does respect my faith. But his family not so much.
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All that is nice, but unless he embraces (with all his heart) the Catholic faith (not just a token conversion), this cannot continue. It does not matter that he asks his family to be polite. He may may respect your faith but he does not share it. And given that the Sacraments are a core belief of the Catholic faith, and one his faith opposes, this will become a problem. WILL, not may.
 
Believe it because his grandfather died a devout catholic, and disowned a small part of his family for leaving and starting their own church! His grandfather received communion every day and half of his family is still Catholics in my parish. We come from a small town and know the story of how the little Christian Church on the corner got started his uncle left and took some followers. It tore that family apart in fact they don’t even claim each other anymore. So for him to fall for a small stern fiesty catholic girl is unbelievable to me too! And ironically they left the uncles church and started a new church, guess they realized if you don’t have a system the pastor can do whatever he wants. So now they have “elders” in their church kind of as a ecclesial set up, how I see it anyway
 
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