Dating a Protestant...

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ESMDHokie77

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dating my protestant girlfriend is getting harder…
I can’t find a way to defend my Catholic faith without saying something stupid or blunt and offending her…
I pray that I will be able to get my points across without hurting her.

Lord hear our prayer.
 
ESMDHokie77 said:
dating my protestant girlfriend is getting harder…
I can’t find a way to defend my Catholic faith without saying something stupid or blunt and offending her…
I pray that I will be able to get my points across without hurting her.

Lord hear our prayer.
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Take a piece of advice from an old man who’s been around for a while. You’re fishin’ in the wrong waters. You need to seek a good, faithful Catholic for a lifelong mate. Not a Protestant (unless she has interest in converting, in which case that should happen first).

No matter how cute she is, you need someone equally yoked in the fullness of Christ’s truth to be your wife so you can help one another get to heaven.
 
How my husband handled it with me:

At first, a gentle “well, maybe you don’t understand Catholicism as well as you think you do.”

When I didn’t let up, a reminder of “you are welcome to your opinion, but please respect that my entire family is Catholic.”

And finally, a nice “listen, I won’t be persecuted in my own home for my faith - I am Catholic and will be until I die,” put an end to it for good!

Arguing with a Protestant won’t go far. Gentle words and faithful actions do.
 
Scoobyshme said:
Take a piece of advice from an old man who’s been around for a while. You’re fishin’ in the wrong waters. You need to seek a good, faithful Catholic for a lifelong mate. Not a Protestant (unless she has interest in converting, in which case that should happen first).

No matter how cute she is, you need someone equally yoked in the fullness of Christ’s truth to be your wife so you can help one another get to heaven.
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As part of a mixed marriage, I find that rather insulting. Why does anyone feel a need to defend your faith at all, unless someone is questioning it?
 
I have to second what Scoobyshme said. It’s nice to think that love conquerors all and that love is blind, but sometimes that’s just a fairy tale. The fact is that if your girlfriend has no intention of converting religious issues will remain issues for quite a while. If you can’t come to a resolution prior to marriage those issues will only be exacerbated.

What would a future wife think that you want to do the right thing and raise any kids Catholic. She could be offended that you don’t think her faith tradition is worthy of respect or she might think you should raise the kids both and let them decide later. Or what would happen if your children hear something in CCD or at Mass and they go to mom for guidance and instead get the Protestant version of what the eucharist is or praying to saints. It could just be a huge minefield that you don’t want to step into. You’d be better off having a Catholic girlfriend that will go to Mass with you and you don’t have to explain to her week in and week out why Father wears vestments and why you have communion every week.

ChadS
 
I have been married to a Protestant for forty four years a lot longer than many same faith couples , I also find your comments insulting and very stereotypical.if theres no glue in a marriage it won’t work no matter what faith they are .Many Good Catholics and Protestants who opposed our marriage and stuck their noses in throughout are now on their second,third,and fourth "relationships"every couple is different no “one size fits all”
 
just pray for peace and ecumenism everybody! Let me be pragmatic about my situation if I have to be, it’s not there yet.
 
O Blood and Water, which gushed forth from the Heart of Jesus as a fount of Mercy for us, I trust in You!

Most Sacred Heart of Jesus, I trust in You!

Most Sacred Heart of Jesus, Your kingdom come!

Most Sacred Heart of Jesus, have mercy on us!

Most Sacred Heart of Jesus, I believe in Your love for me.

Jesus, meek and humble of Heart, make our hearts like unto Yours.

Amen.
 
ESMDHokie77 said:
dating my protestant girlfriend is getting harder…
I can’t find a way to defend my Catholic faith without saying something stupid or blunt and offending her…
I pray that I will be able to get my points across without hurting her.

Lord hear our prayer.
Click to expand...
May God, through His Most Holy Spirit grant you the words and actions that will best show Christ to your girlfriend.

Just a comment though on your problems…In defense of the faith, expressed in Truth and Charity, there nothing that is “stupid”…and while there are things that are “blunt”, if they are offensive to her it is due to one of two things. Either you did not express it in charity, or it hits too close to home in her error.

Patience with her as a fellow sojourner, and discernment as to whether she is “the one”.

Peace
James
 
jamanne said:
I have been married to a Protestant for forty four years a lot longer than many same faith couples , I also find your comments insulting and very stereotypical.if theres no glue in a marriage it won’t work no matter what faith they are .Many Good Catholics and Protestants who opposed our marriage and stuck their noses in throughout are now on their second,third,and fourth "relationships"every couple is different no “one size fits all”
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Whether my comments are insulting or not is a matter of opinion, however, like yours, mine are based on experience also. I dated a girl for a while that described herself as Christian, although her and her family hadn’t set foot in a church in 10 years by that point. She couldn’t understand why I ever converted or why I would’ve wanted to leave a “perfectly good religion” for one that wasn’t. She wondered why priests had to always wear those vestments, why there was so much singing at Mass, why we used incense (this was around Christmas), and why we had communion every Sunday.

She worried about my salvation because I was Catholic and not of her “religion.” She thought not eating meat on Fridays during Lent was “silly.” She said her if her father ever saw a Catechism in his house he’d throw it away.

So you can excuse me for not thinking that couples of different religions if both are ostensibly Christian should be together and that it might be better if they shared the same beliefs.

ChadS
 
Try and get her to read the early church fathers does she go to mass with you let me say one thing do not go to her church in place of mass let her see your devotion let her see that you also have faith in Jesus Christ as your saviour
 
I was agnostic when I was married. In fact, I wasn’t baptized or anything. I converted in '96. You may be used as a vehicle for her conversion.

Gabriel the Archangel, pray for this pair.
 
Scoobyshme said:
Take a piece of advice from an old man who’s been around for a while. You’re fishin’ in the wrong waters. You need to seek a good, faithful Catholic for a lifelong mate. Not a Protestant (unless she has interest in converting, in which case that should happen first).

No matter how cute she is, you need someone equally yoked in the fullness of Christ’s truth to be your wife so you can help one another get to heaven.
Click to expand...
icamay said:
How my husband handled it with me:

At first, a gentle “well, maybe you don’t understand Catholicism as well as you think you do.”

When I didn’t let up, a reminder of “you are welcome to your opinion, but please respect that my entire family is Catholic.”

And finally, a nice “listen, I won’t be persecuted in my own home for my faith - I am Catholic and will be until I die,” put an end to it for good!

Arguing with a Protestant won’t go far. Gentle words and faithful actions do.
Click to expand...
Because Protestants are obviously “less saved” than Catholics.

We are not second-class citizens.

And we all have the same personality type, blunt and stupid.

Obviously.
 
Overall most protestants haven’t even bothered to think much about the Catholic faith other than “that’s not for me”. Therefore digging deep into Catholicism isn’t what the average protestant does despite their strong faith in Christ. Be careful not to come off “arrogant” as is easy to do. Instead of YOU explaining the Catholic faith perhaps you could give her either some CD’s, DVD’s or books so that it comes from someone else explaining. These were helpful to me in my conversion.

My prayers for both of you,
mlz
 
mlz said:
Overall most protestants haven’t even bothered to think much about the Catholic faith other than “that’s not for me”. Therefore digging deep into Catholicism isn’t what the average protestant does despite their strong faith in Christ. Be careful not to come off “arrogant” as is easy to do. Instead of YOU explaining the Catholic faith perhaps you could give her either some CD’s, DVD’s or books so that it comes from someone else explaining. These were helpful to me in my conversion.

My prayers for both of you,
mlz
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The unfair and stereotyping generalizations I’m seeing about Protestants all over this forum are making me dizzy.

I only came on here to better understand the Catholic faith so I can understand and respect my significant other and expand my vision so I’m not as biased.

There are more ex-Catholics in my church than those who started out with us. That should tell you something.
 
Deliver us, Lord Jesus Christ,
from all our iniquities and from every evil,
may we ever hold fast to Your commandments
and never allow us to be separated from Your love.
Please look kindly on our petitions
as we come to you with heartfelt need for
healing, protection, guidance, comfort,
and most especially to feel Your presence in our lives.
Amen.
 
KaraGordon said:
The unfair and stereotyping generalizations I’m seeing about Protestants all over this forum are making me dizzy.

I only came on here to better understand the Catholic faith pso I can understand and respect my significant other and expand my vision so I’m not as biased.

There are more ex-Catholics in my church than those who started out with us. That should tell you something.
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Stay true to the beauty and depth of truth within the Cathoic church and do not only look to people within the Church, which unfortunately will always disappoint you( and I can ASSURE you happens equally in Protestant faiths) you obviously seem to care for this woman. My only advise is not to abandon your Catholic faith, pray for. how discernment for your life and continue praying and trusting our Lord… Perhaps you might desire a spiritual mentor as well. You have my prayers

mlz
 
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