Dating outside the Church

[White_Peony]

What are your opinions on dating non-Catholics? Is it always better to wait for a Catholic to come into your life?

It says in 2 Corinthians 6,

“Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers.”

I strongly advise against it because it can draw you away from the Church. Dating is preparing for marriage; it’s looking for a future spouse. Would you marry anyone outside the Church? If you want a Catholic spouse, date Catholics

 

[Defender1]

 

[sparrowhawk28]

Dating and marrying outside the Church could pose significant problems - you could become distanced from your faith, or you could fall into deep disagreement with your partner regarding belief, tradition or practice.

We’re all different - some people will say that you shouldn’t marry outside the Church, and others say you should. I believe it’s important to remain open-minded, and I feel God guides us all according to His plan. I want to find a guy who loves God more than he loves me. If I manage to find such a person and he isn’t Catholic, then maybe I would still consider deepening my relationship with him. For me, love for God is most important, as it speaks volumes about a person.

So think about it deeply and recognise your needs and wants. Listen out for God and pay attention to what He could be telling you. Best of luck.

 

[sarahq]

Dating and marrying outside the Church could pose significant problems - you could become distanced from your faith, or you could fall into deep disagreement with your partner regarding belief, tradition or practice.

We’re all different - some people will say that you shouldn’t marry outside the Church, and others say you should. I believe it’s important to remain open-minded, and I feel God guides us all according to His plan. I want to find a guy who loves God more than he loves me. If I manage to find such a person and he isn’t Catholic, then maybe I would still consider deepening my relationship with him. For me, love for God is most important, as it speaks volumes about a person.

So think about it deeply and recognise your needs and wants. Listen out for God and pay attention to what He could be telling you. Best of luck.

Thank you-- this sounds like very good advice! I agree, I couldn’t be in a relationship with someone unless Jesus came first for them as well as for me.

 

[sparrowhawk28]

Thank you-- this sounds like very good advice! I agree, I couldn’t be in a relationship with someone unless Jesus came first for them as well as for me.

Not a problem May God bless and guide you.

 

[JohnAlexander]

In general I think it is a really bad idea to marry someone of a different faith. Now the purpose of dating someone is to determine if you should get married. I don’t understand the point of dating someone when you plan on breaking up with them.

Marriage can be difficult at times. Some people can be vicious in the way they fight. I also think the devil gets into people. What if differences in religion becomes the weapon of choice? What if the non Catholic spouse won’t let you take your children to Mass on Sundays? What if they teach them to profane the Eucharist? What if they teach them heresies?

There are many things I am willing to compromise on. I give in very often, most of the time in fact (I’m sure my wife would dispute this!) But there is one thing I would never compromise on and that is religion. I will not ever accept my children being taught any false religion. How do you compromise, the Eucharist is either the Body of Christ or it is just bread. I could not bear it if my wife were to patronize my belief. Either the Real Presence is true or Catholics are complete idiots. You can’t have it any other way.
So if my wife were not Catholic, she either would become one because of the Eucharist, or she would have to think I am a complete idiot. If she were to excuse my belief then I would think she was the idiot.

The Eucharist is central to our life on earth. Manna from heaven. “Sir,” they said, “from now on give us this bread.” They knew him in the breaking of the bread.

I think it is worse when the husband is not Catholic. When you are in love you agree to anything. Children will be raised Catholic, no problem (as long as you don’t actually have kids), go to Mass on Sundays, no problem, kids in Catholic school, no problem unless the money gets tight, you get the picture. He won’t understand prohibition against birth control. He will eventually become lazy about going to Mass on Sundays. It is just trouble.

Half of all marriages end in divorce. How quickly would you get in a car if you knew there was a 50% chance you would get in an accident? If you don’t share a faith it makes it that much harder. Why add to the burdens?

 

[blueadept]

While this is a rather straight forward question, it depends on one’s status in life in how they approach the subject. Permit me to share my story. My first marriage was to a Catholic but I can’t say that either one of us at that time took our faith seriously and didn’t have it blessed in the RCC. She had 4 kids prior to our marriage and we added two of our own. It ended due to infidelity on her part and I raised 4 of those kids on my own for 6 years so that didn’t work out well for me in marrying a Catholic. When I remarried, it was to a non-Catholic but it was obvious that God was a major part of her life and I felt we could make the mixed-faith marriage work. In the process of that though, I became an on-fire type of Catholic which didn’t bode well for my marriage. She was hoping I would convert but I had a different kind of conversion. Hmmm.

What are your opinions on dating non-Catholics? Is it always better to wait for a Catholic to come into your life?

So what do you think my advice to my daughters would be?

The one thing I changed for them was that I gave them the opportunity to fall in love with their Catholic faith and be on fire with it for themselves and not just because of me. They’ve seen the struggles I went through in trying to make my mixed-faith marriage work and I’m fairly confident that they have no desire to try that one. My youngest one is a senior in high school and has been going out with a good Catholic for the last 3 1/2 years and they’ve been chaste through that entire time. One thing that happened last summer was that my daughter put their relationship on pause since she questioned if he was as dedicated of a Catholic as she is. After World Youth Day in Madrid, he decided that he could support her better in her faith than he previously showed.

Needless to say, I’m proud of the maturity my daughters show in regards to the importance of their faith and they both proudly where their chastity rings since they made their vow over 4 years ago. I suspect they won’t be dating outside the faith even though I’ve never asked them.