Dealing with condescending Protestants

[Tablefor9]

… She is crossing some serious professional boundaries by imposing her religious values into the work environment in a way that is disrespectful of your faith tradition. It’s not like the two of you are friends having a respectful ecumenical dialogue. She’s outright trying to convince you that whatever you believe is WRONG. Does she go to Muslims and tell them that Muhammad isn’t real?

“Seek first to understand, not to be understood.” I’d listen to her, smile and thank her for sharing her perspective. She is an example of an immature Christian who is overzealous to “save” people according to her own limited worldview. Jesus Christ never twisted anyone’s arm to have faith in Him.

Good insight, here. Acknowledge that this person is seeking to do good, and most likely has the highest of motives. She genuinely doesn’t understand. Have one last chat, in which you thank her for her concern, acknowledge her love for Our Lord, and set boundaries. Perhaps you are happy to discuss this at lunch or on break. And present her with two books: Rome Sweet Home (Scott Hahn) and Does the Bible Really Say That? Discovering Catholic Teaching in Scripture (Patrick Madrid)–if she’s not a reader, there are audio resources available from Kimberly Hahn, I think from Lighthouse Media or Magnificat.

When you do this, one of two things will happen; either she will back off completely, or she will begin to ask questions, because once one gives the Church a chance, she draws you in.
This is the work of evangelism, not prostelyzing, to present an answer for the hope and joy that is within us.

Blessings~
v

 

[808Catholic]

Long.story.short.

A woman at work found out I was Catholic and ever since…has been trying to trap me in conversation about how Catholicism is wrong. Work related environmental rules aside, in the past I’ve never wavered in places where I was put on trial. I’ve spoken at length with Jews, Mormons, even Muslims. Each try throw in a little conversion talk, but I spot it pretty quick.

This lady though, she basically told me there’s no Biblical basis for the communion of saints, the Virgin Mary, or Purgatory. She relayed a passage of Mark 16:38 (i think), talking about the veil that was lifted on Jesus, therefore he is all that is needed.

I don’t know if I’m just venting, but anyone else deal with condescending Protestants?

Think I hit the enter key by mistake so I’ll retype my response.

I’ve never been in this specific situation but have had similar conversations with Born Again Christians, Jehovah Witnesses, and LDS. In each case, I used the same approach: love and patience. Though the person may seem like she’s attacking, she lacks faith and may be calling out for help from you. In general, Protestant apologists, especially those who choose to attack Catholics, feel they know all about the Catholic faith and want to “save” us from our own mistakes. It is their pride that blinds them to the Biblical facts proving the Catholic Church is the true church so be kind, loving, and patient. Focus on specific issues she has with the Catholic faith and discuss them one by one so you both have a chance to research and explain your point of view. I’d suggest you don’t limit the time spend on any one topic but be patient and explore all aspects of that topic so you don’t give her the impression you’ve short changed her.

In general, I would recommend you don’t accuse or label concepts in a personal way. I.e. “You Protestants believe…” “You’re the one who said…” By making it personal, they take it personally and emotion overrides logic. No one ever wins when the discussion turns emotional.

Be factual; if you don’t know say, “I don’t know but I’d like to have some time to research that aspect so I can respond to you.”

Be polite and humble. Resist responding in a snarky way even though it’s plain she might be snarky to you especially in front of anyone else. People empathize with polite people and, even if she “wins” the logical debate, your co-workers will probably side with you because no one deep down likes a smarty pants.

One of my favorite closing lines is “God Bless you.” I can’t think of a better way to close that with a blessing. There are only a handful of times when someone I’ve been in heated debate with has thrown my blessing wish away. Then I give them another “God Bless you.” I’m not being facetious in any way; I truly would like God to bless them even if they don’t want God’s Blessing.

God Bless you!

 

[808Catholic]

As her co-worker, only you can decide whether she is “harmless” or not. But before deciding not to refer this issue to HR, you might want to think about the NEXT person, specifically the next Catholic, she might work next to, how much that person might be disturbed, and whether that next person would be able to handle the situation as you can.

You make a very good point. This woman may find a Catholic who is more susceptible to conversion so stick with her and keep her fixed on you. We may not like the cross we’re asked to carry but Jesus’s cross was much heavier! God Bless you.

 

[808Catholic]

Personally, I would brush-up on defending the faith, then take her to lunch and school her. Maybe God is putting you in theses situations for a reason.

Learning more about our faith and Doctrine is always a good thing. Not sure about your “school her” advice. Perhaps she can invite her to Mass one Sunday and ask a knowledgeable person (Deacon, RCIA Director, etc) sit with the 2 of them explaining how each part of the Mass comes directly from the Bible. I’ve never been to a Protestant service but I’m guessing their services don’t have Biblical origins. God Bless you.

 

[guanophore]

Long.story.short.

A woman at work found out I was Catholic and ever since…has been trying to trap me in conversation about how Catholicism is wrong. Work related environmental rules aside, in the past I’ve never wavered in places where I was put on trial. I’ve spoken at length with Jews, Mormons, even Muslims. Each try throw in a little conversion talk, but I spot it pretty quick.

This lady though, she basically told me there’s no Biblical basis for the communion of saints, the Virgin Mary, or Purgatory. She relayed a passage of Mark 16:38 (i think), talking about the veil that was lifted on Jesus, therefore he is all that is needed.

I don’t know if I’m just venting, but anyone else deal with condescending Protestants?

The most important thing to do is pray, pray, pray. How you act on it, or not, will depend upon how the Spirit leads. Sometimes I tell them “well, we read it differently, don’t we?” and let it go at that.

Sometimes I tell them "the New Testament is a collection of Sacred writings inspired by the Holy Spirit, and written by, for, and about Catholics. It reflects the Catholic faith. Then the argument changes to where the Bible came from.

 

[guanophore]

To be honest, she is harmless and the situation is harmless. I’m not going to report her to HR or tell her to cease. I’d rather work next to her than an atheist.

My dilemma is how best to deal with the “You may be Catholic, and Catholics are Christians…but you are still wrong” attitude.

Have you told her it is hurtful and comes across condescending?

She probably feels an obligation to God to try to save you from your errors.

These kinds of Christians believe the faith should be extracted from the pages of the book.

Catholics receive the Gospel form the successors of the Apostles. We read the Bible from the point of view of the faith that produced it.

You could always invite her to join us over here!

 

[Peter_J]

My dilemma is how best to deal with the “You may be Catholic, and Catholics are Christians…but you are still wrong” attitude.

You should adopt the attitude that “She is Protestant, and Protestants are Christians, but she is still wrong.”

 

[Peter_J]

That reminds me of a humorous exchange I once had with my wife (Baptist raised, now Catholic). In jest, she said, “At least we read the Bible” to which I quipped, “Yeah, after you stole it from us.” She replied, “Well, we wouldn’t have been able to if you would have picked it up once in a while, you ought to be grateful that we cleaned all the dust off!”

Sounds like your wife has a wonderful sense of humor.

P.S. Now you’ve got me to wondering whether there’s any Protestant bible-question that has not, at some time or other, been answered by a Catholic with “Well, the bible is ours and you stole it from us.” (I’ll probably never know, of course. )

 

[CarmelJerome]

Long.story.short.

A woman at work found out I was Catholic and ever since…has been trying to trap me in conversation about how Catholicism is wrong. Work related environmental rules aside, in the past I’ve never wavered in places where I was put on trial. I’ve spoken at length with Jews, Mormons, even Muslims. Each try throw in a little conversion talk, but I spot it pretty quick.

This lady though, she basically told me there’s no Biblical basis for the communion of saints, the Virgin Mary, or Purgatory. She relayed a passage of Mark 16:38 (i think), talking about the veil that was lifted on Jesus, therefore he is all that is needed.

I don’t know if I’m just venting, but anyone else deal with condescending Protestants?

Let this fuel your love for Christ, and let your conversation about Him show the depth of the faith; when Protestants see that your love of Him is strong, unaffected, true, and simple, then the conversation can move forward. Since they've always been taught that these things are obstacles to life in Christ, let it be seen, rather than argued, that in real life they all amplify and honor and raise Him, because it's not we who raise Him, but He who raises the saints, His Mother, and who raises us through His Body in Eucharist.

Also, read Pope Francis’ exhortation ‘The Joy of the Gospel’ – a wonderful help in showing us what the evangel is and how to share it.

 

[JonNC]

=NewSeeker;12304499]This lady, the same as any Protestant, has no biblical basis to believe the Bible is inspired. The only reason the Bible is inspired is because the Catholic Church declared it to be so when the Church selected the books to be included in it and declared them to be inspired .

Who knows? Maybe she takes the Eastern Orthodox word for it.

There is no reason to deny the role of the early Church Catholic in the receiving of the scriptures. The biblical basis is that Christ instituted the Church and gave it teaching authority, and the power of the keys. And while the Catholic Church now in communion with the Bishop of Rome is certainly part of the early Catholic Church, it is not only and exclusively so.

Ask her why she’s using the sacred book the Catholic Church authorized and gave her and using it to criticize the Church that gave it to her. Maybe conclude by saying "we’d like our book back, please, since you’re mangling its meaning.

My sense is this is just as unhelpful as her approach.

Jon

 

[steve_b]

Long.story.short.

A woman at work found out I was Catholic and ever since…has been trying to trap me in conversation about how Catholicism is wrong. Work related environmental rules aside, in the past I’ve never wavered in places where I was put on trial. I’ve spoken at length with Jews, Mormons, even Muslims. Each try throw in a little conversion talk, but I spot it pretty quick.

This lady though, she basically told me there’s no Biblical basis for the communion of saints, the Virgin Mary, or Purgatory. She relayed a passage of Mark 16:38 (i think), talking about the veil that was lifted on Jesus, therefore he is all that is needed.

I don’t know if I’m just venting, but anyone else deal with condescending Protestants?

Just tell her this is not the place to have such discussions. If you and she want to have protracted discussions, then plan to meet off site. But not to continue on site. It you don’t want to meet her off site either, and she doesn’t stop her activity at work, then report her.