I struggle with scrupulosity a great deal, and one issue I really have is perpetual doubts during prayer. When I’m praying I am constantly bombarded with thoughts against faith, to the point that I feel almost completely enwrapped in blasphemies… Of course, I don’t really believe that stuff, but it’s hard to continue a Rosary or any kind of prayer when you feel like you’re not really even praying.
Any thoughts or suggestions? Can you relate to this at all? Do you just keep praying even when it feels like your heart is a million miles away?
I just finished reading the Catechism of the Catholic Church today. There is a section on prayer, about 70 pages. It covers problems in prayer, like distractions and doubts, too, as I recall. I will have to go back and look up what it says.
My recommendation: abandon yourself to prayer. Abandon yourself to prayer beyond doubting. One thing I had to do myself in the last six months was to remind myself that I am not just reciting words, but that I am speaking to someone. Make sure that in prayer you are speaking to someone.
If you pray privately in a room by yourself, allow yourself to at least whisper the prayer words, and listen to yourself, to the prayer. That may help you focus and avoid distractions.
When I go to Mass on Sunday, I now take industrial earplugs, to drown out all the people talking, laughing, etc. in church before Mass.
The CCC reminds us that we should be in prayer constantly, by our words or actions. That section on prayer is really good to read. good pointers there.
The CCC points out that if you searched all the prayers in the Bible (including Psalms), you would not find anything that is not expressed in the Lord’s prayer. There’s about 12 pages or so in the CCC on the Lord’s prayer. If you read nothing else in the CCC, read that.
You must work on your faith and spirituality. It is not just all passive infusion from God.
One last thing, Pope Benedict wrote in something I read recently, and it’s in the CCC as well, the words of the angel to Mary was not exactly “Hail, Mary” it is better translated as
“Rejoice, Mary.” So you may want to train yourself to say the Hail Mary more accurately
Rejoice, Mary, Full of Grace, the LORD is with Thee !!
Blessed art Thou among women, and blessed is the fruit of Thy womb, Jesus."
Remember, you are talking to somebody. If you need a kick in the pants, here it is: Show
some respect.