Dealing with hard people

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TemplarKnight1

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Excuse me for the language…but how does a good Catholic deal with such people? These people are “jerks” (Edited), and people who consistently try to make your life miserable.

Sometimes, I want to talk back to them and fight fire with fire… but I always restrain myself and I don’t know how much longer I can hold it.

I am not the patient type.

Ignore them? Pray for them? Confront them?

The longer I tolerate them… the weaker I seem.

Just because I treat everybody as a Christian doesn’t mean that they play by the same rules.
 
I totally get your frustration…My advice would be to pray for them. I know it’s tempting to fight fire with fire, but in the end nothing changes. Jesus could have told Pilate and all the self-righteous Pharisee’s where to get off, and in their minds he may have seemed weak for refusing to answer. I think Jesus demonstrated perfect strength though. I think it shows more strength to show kindness to those that insult us. It’s hard, but ultimately we know that it’s prayer, not our words that change the hearts of our fellow men.
 
TemplarKnight1 said:
The longer I tolerate them… the weaker I seem.
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Well, is it harder to fight back, or to abstain from fighting back? I imagine it’s harder to abstain.

Therefore, your toleration indicates your strength.

If you’re just worried about what the other people think, why would you care what they think? They’re jerks. And you know something they don’t know. You know that it is harder to build up then to tear down.

Plus, sometimes when people get at you, the most annoying thing for them is for them to fail to rile you up. It’s not the most charitable reason for not getting mad at people, but hey, whatever works. 🙂

–Jen
 
Where do you draw the line though? Do you just let them completely trample you?
revert_jen said:
Well, is it harder to fight back, or to abstain from fighting back? I imagine it’s harder to abstain.

Therefore, your toleration indicates your strength.

If you’re just worried about what the other people think, why would you care what they think? They’re jerks. And you know something they don’t know. You know that it is harder to build up then to tear down.

Plus, sometimes when people get at you, the most annoying thing for them is for them to fail to rile you up. It’s not the most charitable reason for not getting mad at people, but hey, whatever works. 🙂

–Jen
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Prayer is always the first thing you should be doing. Always.

As far as fighting back, or staying out of the situation by “turning the other cheek,” I think we all know what Jesus would say. However, there are some times we probably ought to defend ourselves, especially if our being trampled would affect people who depend on us.

Additionally, recall that He said, “Whoever calls his brother “racca” (fool,) will be subject to the fires of hell.” But right here and right now, the longer you keep thinking of this individual, or these people, as jerks, for just that long do you deprive yourself of peace and joy. There is no having peace and joy when you are holding onto a grudge. It isn’t even good for your physical health. The sooner you can get rid of the grudge, the better.

So pray for the “jerks.” Even if you have to start at the level of “God bless that jerk,” within a few weeks you will find yourself praying that these people have the same blessings that you would like for yourself. That will free your energy to enjoy your life without them consuming your thought and energy.

Why would you want to think of someone you don’t like one second more than absolutely necessary?

These are just my thoughts on the subject. You didn’t give any specifics in your post, so I have no idea what I would do in your situation.
 
How are they making your life miserable? Maybe some specific examples would make our advice more useful i.e. so we can determine if they are anti-Catholic, anti-christian or bullying you on some other issue. 🙂
 
Are these people family members or people that you just encounter online? Are these coworkers or classmates that are targeting you because of your faith? I think you definitely should pray no matter what, but it will be easier to give advice on where to draw the line if you gave examples of what they’re doing.
 
I have a couple of these people in my life right now.

One is a group of people who hang out, play loud music and solicit in front of my workplace and they do this on a daily basis. I have contemplated bringing a paintball gun to work to scare them off.
 
TemplarKnight1 said:
I have a couple of these people in my life right now.

One is a group of people who hang out, play loud music and solicit in front of my workplace and they do this on a daily basis. I have contemplated bringing a paintball gun to work to scare them off.
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That will probably get you arrested. Suggest you calm down and learn to ignore more people…
 
TemplarKnight1 said:
I have a couple of these people in my life right now.

One is a group of people who hang out, play loud music and solicit in front of my workplace and they do this on a daily basis. I have contemplated bringing a paintball gun to work to scare them off.
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As the saying goes, “Two wrongs don’t make a right”

My advice? DON’T do it.

Don’t stoop to their level. Best to just IGNORE these characters as best you can and get on with the ‘more important’ things of life.

DO say a prayer for them.

DO as our Blessed Mother did: ‘She contemplated all things in her heart’.

Don’t worry about seeming weak. It takes a strong person to let water fly off a ducks back than offer retaliation.

I wish you all the best.
 
TemplarKnight1 said:
Excuse me for the language…but how does a good Catholic deal with such people? These people are “jerks” (Edited), and people who consistently try to make your life miserable.

Sometimes, I want to talk back to them and fight fire with fire… but I always restrain myself and I don’t know how much longer I can hold it.

I am not the patient type.

Ignore them? Pray for them? Confront them?

The longer I tolerate them… the weaker I seem.

Just because I treat everybody as a Christian doesn’t mean that they play by the same rules.
Click to expand...
Maybe if one considers Jesus didn’t win every verbal disagreement. John 6:51-69 it will take the pressure off winning debates. For Those who are disagreeable, Jesus just let them go. Therefore, no matter what, don’t YOU take your eyes off the prize…regardless what the other guy does.
 
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