I did not say that, I simply don’t really care how I die.
I had a old school mate back in school named Austin. We became estranged after a fight in middle school. The next time I heard his name my brother was playing for funeral. My brother plays taps for vets. He had gotten killed by a drunk driver down in Texas, He was a month from getting married. I have regrets over not reconciling with him And I think of my great uncles Carl and Raymond. They were in the same nursing home, but were at odds. They woulds stare at each other in anger. When Carl died, Raymond was despondent. He spent his last days pondering over what he should have done. As I was learning the faith I watched a sermon given by some Traditionalist. He told a story of a great saint (can’t remember his name who was playing billiards with 3 companions. He asked them “If you had only 1 hour left to live, what would you do?” The first companion said. “I will tell my wife how much I love her” “too late!” said the saint. The second companion said " I will tell my family how much they mean to me" “too late!” The saint said. The third companion said “I will forgive all who wronged me”
“Too late!” the saint again. Annoyed, his companions said " what would YOU do?"
“Play Billiards” replied the saint
It taught me that one should not care much about how they die, when they die, or the like. What REALLY MATTERS is that by the time you have died. MAKE SURE ALL your affairs are in order. Has someone wronged you, but you have not forgiven them? Do so, less they be taken away. Do your children know they how much they mean to you, and how much you love them? Tell them. Have you been away from a lonely friend or relative for too long? Reconnect, and tell them you care.
I used to afraid of dying ever since I was a kid. But ever since I found God, I no longer do. I could die tomorrow in a car crash, or die of cancer 50 years from now. I am simply glad, I found Him after being away from to long. Because you never know necessarily when it is your time.