Decision Time.

[KnitNut]

Well you are right. Yesterday I did the paperwork for the bankruptcy. I told my husband I wanted to let the 550.00 car payment go in the bankruptcy and use a bit of 401k loan to buy an older used car. He got really upset. He has told me that there is nothing “safe” under 13k that he can find and has all but demanded that I keep the car.

I have thrown every option at him and he has continuously refused.

He also told me that I should start looking for a new job back in a state without a state income tax because we can never get ahead in our state.

You keep allowing him to manipulate you. Bottom line - if it’s your bankruptcy & the car is in your name, it GOES. Because YOU can NOT AFFORD IT. If he suddenly becomes rich & can afford it, more power to him. But YOU can’t. So it GOES.

The “13k minimum” line is baloney. He just wants what he wants and he’s going to pick at you until you cave. I’d be on the line to the therapist pronto asking for an extra “buck up” session so you can withstand the tantrums.

 

[LorilopezInneed]

He is now trying to get a lease in HiS name so he can get a new vehicle albeit with a lower car payment.

I obviously can’t stop that. But I can def tell him he needs to find a new place to live

 

[St_Francis]

He is now trying to get a lease in HiS name so he can get a new vehicle albeit with a lower car payment.

I obviously can’t stop that. But I can def tell him he needs to find a new place to live

That sounds like what you need to do. Talk to someone knowlwdgeable about the laws in your state–there are groups which help women with divorce on a sliding scale: contact one–and get everything in order first. You do not want him wiping out your bank accounts in his way out, nor anything else. Your therapist might be able to help you with finding a group to help you.

God bless you!

 

[LorilopezInneed]

I have long been the person who has delayed and avoided all of this. Now it’s the holidays and he is back to “trying mode”. He says he is willing to move… Although he isn’t happy about it. He also says … While he won’t buy a used car with cash… He will agree to leasing a new vehicle with a reduced car payment.

But he still says I must file bankruptcy… He says “I don’t see any other options”.

I asked him to see a financial adviser. He brushed it off and said that they would just tell us what we already know… We are broke.

But the question is… To the objective folks out there… Is any of the above really trying?