Deer in Headlights - RCIA Catechumen Needs Guidance

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knit247

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For some reason the past few days I have felt frozen - like a deer in the headlights. I am going to RCIA weekly, have read and studied the notes that our teacher has given us, but other than that I feel like I have no idea what I “should” be doing. I am attending Mass weekly and learned the first part of the Hail Mary. I have read Rome Sweet Home and am going through Catholicism for Dummies. Other than that - nothing much.

What would you all suggest for me? As a sort of next step? I was thinking about going through the Baltimore Catechism, as I do not currently have a copy of the CCC. I feel like there are certain prayers or readings that I should say daily, but not sure what. Oh, and starting today I am also abstaining from meat on Fridays. Thoughts? And thanks in advance!
 
I like the Baltimore series, you can get the First Communion and books 1 then 2 at most Catholic bookstores or online retailers as its an excellent Traditional Catechism. They are not that expensive at all. The wording is geared more towards children, and easy to understand. Also, there are smaller paper back versions of the Catechism of the Catholic Church available too that condense the detail and touch on the important topics. When you are comfortable and understand, then go ahead and read a few pages at a time of the thicker Catechism each day.
 
knit247 said:
For some reason the past few days I have felt frozen - like a deer in the headlights. I am going to RCIA weekly, have read and studied the notes that our teacher has given us, but other than that I feel like I have no idea what I “should” be doing. I am attending Mass weekly and learned the first part of the Hail Mary. I have read Rome Sweet Home and am going through Catholicism for Dummies. Other than that - nothing much.

What would you all suggest for me? As a sort of next step? I was thinking about going through the Baltimore Catechism, as I do not currently have a copy of the CCC. I feel like there are certain prayers or readings that I should say daily, but not sure what. Oh, and starting today I am also abstaining from meat on Fridays. Thoughts? And thanks in advance!
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Start following the practices of the Church (those that you can’ obviously you can’t receive the sacraments yet), study those doctrines you are struggling with (and don’t pretend there isn’t at least one, I know there is, there always is), and pray (if you want structure, pray the Divine Office). You do not need to do any more, but study into the Church and her teachings, because remember you’ll be asked to vow that you believe all the Church teaches to be formed by divine teaching, and to be the Truth (capital T as it’s divine truth).
 
Well, there’s no way I can know enough from this post to understand why you feel like a deer in headlights…I’m studying to be a counselor, so my instinct is to actually start with the feeling, since everything else you’ve said seems to be fine (my only idea is that you could possibly add something to daily prayer, such as a rosary, if you like).

Is this a “what now?” kind of feeling? If so, I believe it may pass in time. Just grow from what you’re doing right now.
 
knit247 said:
For some reason the past few days I have felt frozen - like a deer in the headlights. I am going to RCIA weekly, have read and studied the notes that our teacher has given us, but other than that I feel like I have no idea what I “should” be doing. I am attending Mass weekly and learned the first part of the Hail Mary. I have read Rome Sweet Home and am going through Catholicism for Dummies. Other than that - nothing much.

What would you all suggest for me? As a sort of next step? I was thinking about going through the Baltimore Catechism, as I do not currently have a copy of the CCC. I feel like there are certain prayers or readings that I should say daily, but not sure what. Oh, and starting today I am also abstaining from meat on Fridays. Thoughts? And thanks in advance!
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Pray more.

Learing the first part of the Hail Mary is good, as are formal prayers. But I don’t hear you saying that you have a personal relationship with Jesus in prayer. Pray, pray, pray, until the moment of your death. And when you don’t know what to say, say the Our Father and ask God to help you to pray.

I also don’t year you say that you read the Bible. Start with the Gospel of John, then Matthew, then maybe Acts. Never stop reading the Bible.

-Tim-
 
knit247 said:
For some reason the past few days I have felt frozen - like a deer in the headlights. I am going to RCIA weekly, have read and studied the notes that our teacher has given us, but other than that I feel like I have no idea what I “should” be doing. I am attending Mass weekly and learned the first part of the Hail Mary. I have read Rome Sweet Home and am going through Catholicism for Dummies. Other than that - nothing much.

What would you all suggest for me? As a sort of next step? I was thinking about going through the Baltimore Catechism, as I do not currently have a copy of the CCC. I feel like there are certain prayers or readings that I should say daily, but not sure what. Oh, and starting today I am also abstaining from meat on Fridays. Thoughts? And thanks in advance!
Click to expand...
You could go to Adoration, if the Blessed Sacrament is exposed in your church. Just talk to Jesus as if He were standing right in front of you - because He is!! Our “set pieces” of prayers are great, especially for the Rosary, but you can also “freestyle” pray and just have a conversation with God. And here’s another simple prayer that many of us use a lot: “Jesus, have mercy on me, a sinner.”

🙂

Read the New Testament. Be sure you have a good CATHOLIC Bible, there are a couple of different Student ones.

Rest in the knowledge that you are on your journey, you don’t have to experience something intense every step of the way. Feelings aren’t facts, remember that. You’re doing everything you need to do, the main thing is moving toward full communion with the Church.

God bless you on your journey “home!”

:signofcross::grouphug:

p.s. Abstaining is great, not required but a great spiritual practice, remember to dedicate your sacrifice to others’ suffering or to your own sinfulness.
 
TY all for your thoughts. I’m sorry that I wasn’t as clear as I needed to be :o
MissRose73 said:
I like the Baltimore series, you can get the First Communion and books 1 then 2 at most Catholic bookstores or online retailers as its an excellent Traditional Catechism
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TY - would this be this series? Part of my problem is that I don’t know what all of the books are. I thought the Baltimore Catechism was one book… Is First Communion a different book? I am confused.
Skeptic92 said:
Start following the practices of the Church (those that you can’ obviously you can’t receive the sacraments yet), study those doctrines you are struggling with (and don’t pretend there isn’t at least one, I know there is, there always is), and pray (if you want structure, pray the Divine Office). You do not need to do any more, but study into the Church and her teachings, because remember you’ll be asked to vow that you believe all the Church teaches to be formed by divine teaching, and to be the Truth (capital T as it’s divine truth).
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Follow the practices of the church? What are those - where do I find them? Or does that mean going to Mass? Most of this is foreign to me, and I grew up as an active member in a mainline Protestant church. I don’t know where to go to find the info - Google only does so much. For instance, the top hits for “practices of the Catholic church” discuss what I think are the beliefs, but not specific practices :confused
ThereWasADream said:
Well, there’s no way I can know enough from this post to understand why you feel like a deer in headlights…I’m studying to be a counselor, so my instinct is to actually start with the feeling, since everything else you’ve said seems to be fine (my only idea is that you could possibly add something to daily prayer, such as a rosary, if you like).

Is this a “what now?” kind of feeling? If so, I believe it may pass in time. Just grow from what you’re doing right now.
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What I have written so far, above, is what I mean - deer in the headlights. I suppose it is a “what now” or “what do I do next” type of feeling. If I’m not sure what I should be doing, how can I possibly do it? And I have no idea about a rosary, and I don’t understand what a mystery is… I actually Googled that as well today. Would I just print off the pages of “how to say the rosary” and take them into church with me, or do I need to memorize it all first? How do I even know that I am doing it right? And where would I get one (rosary)? I looked online at several places, but am not sure - am I supposed to buy one? Should it be blessed or something? I certainly will purchase one ASAP if that’s the customary thing to do. We were given Bibles at our 2nd or 3rd RCIA class. Would we get rosaries as well? Are they more “special” to the individual when they come from someone? I think for someone new to Catholicim, it can all be pretty overwhelming - and I am most certainly overwhelmed. I want to be completely prepared and knowledgeable come Easter, but feel pretty lost right now.
TimothyH said:
Pray more.

Learing the first part of the Hail Mary is good, as are formal prayers. But I don’t hear you saying that you have a personal relationship with Jesus in prayer. Pray, pray, pray, until the moment of your death. And when you don’t know what to say, say the Our Father and ask God to help you to pray.

I also don’t year you say that you read the Bible. Start with the Gospel of John, then Matthew, then maybe Acts. Never stop reading the Bible.

-Tim-
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I have always prayed, read the Bible, and have said the Our Father with my daughters every night for 8 or 9 years now. Yea! Something I do know about!
 
TheRealJuliane said:
You could go to Adoration, if the Blessed Sacrament is exposed in your church…

Read the New Testament…

Rest in the knowledge that you are on your journey, you don’t have to experience something intense every step of the way…
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TY so much. I will look into Adoration. Since the chapel is shared by Catholics, Orthodox, Protestants, Lutherans, COGIC, and the Jewish populations ( this is a military base in Germany), I am not sure what is available when.
 
knit247 said:
Follow the practices of the church? What are those - where do I find them? Or does that mean going to Mass? Most of this is foreign to me, and I grew up as an active member in a mainline Protestant church. I don’t know where to go to find the info - Google only does so much. For instance, the top hits for “practices of the Catholic church” discuss what I think are the beliefs, but not specific practices :confused
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I can understand what you are talking about because when I first returned to the Church I felt like I wanted to give back so much.The fact that you were active in your former community also leads you to feeling that you want to be active in your new community and to immerse yourself more fully in the Catholic life. Good for you!!!

One thing that I would suggest is a little patience. There is much to learn and many riches to choose from within the Church. Take some time to explore and discover what is your personal path - what sorts of things you are naturally drawn to.

As regards “practices”, perhaps a better term to use here would be “Devotions”. There are many different devotions available, from the Rosary to Adoration, to the Divine Mercy Chaplet, to Lectio Divina (divine reading) to various forms of contemplation etc…
As one person said, it might be best for you to simply spend more time in informal prayer. Just talk to God like you always have. Ask Him to guide you to the practices, devotions, that will be of greatest help to you.

To get something of a cross section, you might consider starting a thread that asks others what their favorite devotions/practices are and why…What sort of “Spirituality” they are drawn to and such…I’ve no doubt but that you will get a lot of good feedback AND be able to learn about the various devotions and get links to help you learn more about each…

Hope this helps

Peace
James
 
knit247 said:
I have always prayed, read the Bible, and have said the Our Father with my daughters every night for 8 or 9 years now. Yea! Something I do know about!
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Sorry, I didn’t mean to assume. I was just basing my suggestions off of what you stated in your original post. If you have been praying for 9 years, you are way ahead of me.

-Tim-
 
knit247 said:
. I feel like there are certain prayers or readings that I should say daily, but not sure what. Oh, and starting today I am also abstaining from meat on Fridays. Thoughts? And thanks in advance!
Click to expand...
best advice
go with the flow and study what you have been given for homework, but in a slow, devotional, meditative way. Some people find it helpful to journal when they read this way, but don’t feel compelled to share what you write unless it brings up questions you wish to ask.

the premier readings for RCIA are the Sunday lectionary, especially the gospel, and the resources you have been given based on the catechism. If you are looking for daily devotional reading, again the readings for Mass of the day should be first choice.

You might also look into asking your sponsor to help you attend or join any parish activities that are going on especially service and social concerns, there should be many this time of year.

Make list of questions or topics you feel have not been discussed or explained. We love love love questions from our participants. btw the question you asked is a great example of something you should ask your RCIA catechist or director.

Welcome home. also don’t feel compelled to change the way you read and pray with the bible, hope you can set a good example to the other participants.

the next thing to look at for reading material, and you could ask us for suggestions, is something that deals with any issue that may have become a sticking point for you. For some people that might be Mary, purgatory, confession to a priest, if you have an issue like that more reading might help.

The closer we get to Lent to more it is about the action of the Holy Spirit within you and ongoing conversion, and the less it is about book learning. It is time to start internalizing what you have been learning, and going deeper in a prayerful way, not necessarily, although it is a component, in an intellectual way.

The evangelization forum is the usual one for RCIA topics and you might want to search their from other past participants in RCIA to see if their experience is helful to you.
 
All the above are wonderful suggestion,

Just remember, deepening our intimacy with God is what it’s all about…

Talk with God, nurture that relationship.
 
knit247 said:
TY all for your thoughts. I’m sorry that I wasn’t as clear as I needed to be :o

TY - would this be this series? Part of my problem is that I don’t know what all of the books are. I thought the Baltimore Catechism was one book… Is First Communion a different book? I am confused.
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I have that set and really like them. They are basically all the same questions but geared to a different audience, and the answers are in more depth in each book. So starting with Baltimore Catechism 1 the answers are short and concise. I find those answers are great as they are easy to recall when you think of the question associated with them. The longer more detailed answers in the later books are great for when you are ready for a more in-depth explanation.

As for what else you should do. I started by learning the rosary and then got a prayer book and started saying morning and evening prayers. I also found reading the CCC helpful, and used this guide from the Coming Home Network to do so
 
+God’s Holy :bible1: Word presents both our . . . Living Wonderful God . . . and man before his fall in the garden when he walked and talked in all holiness with his Creator and his **God **. . . and after as man in his fallen sinful state of separation from God . . . as objects to study and learn about . . . a fascinating way to study the subject is to take two different colored markers and use one to highlight all references to . . . God . . . so as to understand Him more fully . . . and the other to highlight all references to . . . man . . . in whatever particular passage you are studying . . . I highly recommend you study and read . . . portion by portion . . . subject by subject . . . The Catechism of the Catholic Church to get fuller richer deeper understandings . . .

Link to Catechism: old.usccb.org/catechism/text/entiretoc1.shtml

A simplified excellent treatise on Catholicism is contained in the . . . Baltimore Catechism . . . a portion of which is quoted below . . . which Catechism I absolutely love . . . it’s marvelous for both students and the teachers since it is in the exceptionally **user friendly **“question and answer” format . . .
The Purpose of Man’s Existence

Lesson 1 from the Baltimore Cathechism

1. Who made us?
God made us.

:bible1: In the beginning, God created heaven and earth. (Genesis 1:1)

2. Who is God?
God is the Supreme Being, infinitely perfect, who made all things and keeps them in existence.

:bible1: In him we live and move and have our being. (Acts 17:28)

3. Why did God make us?
God made us to show forth His goodness and to share with us His everlasting happiness in heaven.

:bible1: Eye has not seen nor ear heard, nor has it entered into the heart of man, what things God has prepared for those who love him. (I Corinthians 2:9)

4. What must we do to gain the happiness of heaven?
To gain the happiness of heaven we must KNOW, LOVE, and SERVE God in this world.

:bible1: Lay not up to yourselves treasures on earth; where the rust and moth consume and where thieves break through and steal. But lay up to yourselves treasures in heaven; where neither the rust nor moth doth consume, and where thieves do not break through nor steal. (Matthew 6:19-20)

5. From whom do we learn to KNOW, LOVE and SERVE God?
We learn to KNOW, LOVE, and SERVE God from Jesus Christ, the Son of God, who teaches us through the Catholic Church.

:bible1:* I ***have come a light into the world that whoever believes in Me may not remain in darkness. (John 12:46)

**6. Where do we find the chief truths taught by ***Jesus Christ *****through the Catholic Church?
We find the chief truths taught by ***Jesus Christ ***through the Catholic Church in the Apostles’ Creed.

:bible1: He that heareth you heareth me; and he that despiseth you despiseth me; and he that despiseth me despiseth him that sent me. (Luke 10:16)

7. Say the Apostles’ Creed.
The Apostles Creed****

I believe in **
God,**
the Father Almighty,
Creator
of heaven and earth,
and in ***
Jesus Christ, ***
his only Son, our Lord,
who was conceived by the **
Holy Spirit,**
born of the Virgin Mary,
suffered under Pontius Pilate,
was crucified, died and was buried;
he descended into hell;
on the third day he rose again from the dead;
he ascended into heaven,
and is seated at the right hand of **
God the Father Almighty;
from there he will come
to judge the living and the dead.
I believe in the **
Holy Spirit,
the Holy Catholic Church,
the communion of saints,
the forgiveness of sins,
the resurrection of the body,
and life everlasting.
Amen.

Link to Baltimore Catechism: catholicity.com/baltimore-catechism/lesson01.html​

. . . all for Jesus+​
 
knit247 said:
What I have written so far, above, is what I mean - deer in the headlights. I suppose it is a “what now” or “what do I do next” type of feeling. If I’m not sure what I should be doing, how can I possibly do it? And I have no idea about a rosary, and I don’t understand what a mystery is… I actually Googled that as well today. Would I just print off the pages of “how to say the rosary” and take them into church with me, or do I need to memorize it all first? How do I even know that I am doing it right? And where would I get one (rosary)? I looked online at several places, but am not sure - am I supposed to buy one? Should it be blessed or something? I certainly will purchase one ASAP if that’s the customary thing to do. We were given Bibles at our 2nd or 3rd RCIA class. Would we get rosaries as well? Are they more “special” to the individual when they come from someone? I think for someone new to Catholicim, it can all be pretty overwhelming - and I am most certainly overwhelmed. I want to be completely prepared and knowledgeable come Easter, but feel pretty lost right now.
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Does your parish pray the rosary prior to mass? If so you could start by following along with that. If not, you can pray it daily at home. There are a few cd recordings of how to pray the rosary, you can use one of the various paper guides. If you get a prayer book, the rosary and how to pray it including the mysteries will be in it. I personally like the Blessed Be God prayer book, but there are other good ones. Any Catholic bookstore and even some Christian bookstores sell rosaries. Maybe your parish has a gift shop, that is another source. You can also buy one online. It does not require blessing to use it. You can get it blessed though, even if you are not Catholic. My RCIA class did give out rosaries the week we studied it.
 
knit247 said:
For some reason the past few days I have felt frozen - like a deer in the headlights. I am going to RCIA weekly, have read and studied the notes that our teacher has given us, but other than that I feel like I have no idea what I “should” be doing.
Click to expand...
Based on what you’ve said it sounds like things are going well. Your enthusiasm is infectious!

My suggestion would be to find ways to get involved in the parish, maybe especially in areas of service. The recommendation to get involved with the parish is because that’s where you’ll find support and connections in the future. Right now you have that through RCIA, but that will eventually come to an end, so it’s good to meet people and forge bonds for the future. And I particularly think of service activities for two reasons. One is that you can get involved in social justice activities before you are received into the Church. You don’t have to be Catholic to feed the hungry! The other is that at the Call to Continuing Conversion your sponsor will be asked if you have advanced in a life of love and service to others. This is a concrete way of showing that you have and that your idea of discipleship is not all about you.
 
Again, TY all so much. I am finally understanding!

FWIW, we are in Germany and the chapel is on a military base. I have a feeling that it is a lot less active than a civilian parish would be. As far as I know the MCCW does a Bible study (it is in the AM, however, and we are a homeschooling family). Other than that I am not aware of anything. I will ask my sponsor tomorrow about other opportunities, however. She is also a homeschooling mom and might know of something I haven’t heard of. I think that we were so active in our last church that I feel like I have so much energy that doesn’t know where to go 😉 I will take that and start the daily Mass readings. That never occurred to me… TY again.
 
+*Just a couple of cents :twocents: worth of personal observation and thought . . . *

For some souls . . . **Sacred :bible1: Scripture ** . . . and the reading of other materials re Christianity and Catholicism . . . are approached from a very human mind-oriented/mental-intellectual approach and mindset . . . however . . . quite frankly . . . for my very simple soul in the Lord . . . graciously blest and immersed by our Lord in both Franciscan and Benedictine Catholic spiritualities . . . contemplative pray:gopray2:er and Lectio Divina (divine reading) . . . have always been my primary approach to growing in the sweet . . . Grace of God . . . and in Catholicism . . . day by day . . . perhaps . . . as an older **Christian **child of God . . . whose soul is newly discovering the depths of the riches of Catholicism . . . the below . . . profoundly Benedictine and Franciscan spiritual understandings . . . might be of some help in your spiritual progress day by day as an RCIA student . . .

In these Catholic spiritualities . . . pray:gopray2:er . . . is essentially the **heart ❤️ ** of one’s soul “talking” to its God . . . on the other hand . . . meditation is taught in Sacred :bible1: Scripture and by our Holy Mother Catholic Church as essentially being the heart of one’s soul “listening” to its God . . . the ultimate goal of these actions of the soul being that at the center . . . of the deep interior quiet within the heart of the soul . . . the soul enters into . . . *constant holy conversation and communion with its God *. . .

Lectio Divina (divine reading) . . . is perhaps the clearest most well lit holy pathway I know of for the soul to “listen” to its God . . . essentially it is encountering God in the reading of a literary level of holy writings in Christendom believed to be especially blessed and anointed of God . . . first order and always primary of which is God’s . . . **Holy :bible1: Word **. . . Sacred Scripture . . . and which group of writings can also include . . . The Holy Rule of St. Benedict . . . The Catechism of the Catholic Church . . . The Baltimore Catechism . . . the Creeds . . . writings of the Fathers and Saints of the Church, etc., . . . and as such . . . when **prayerfully ** read and meditated upon the . . . **Holy Spirit **. . . Wonderful Counselor of Our God . . . is abundantly available to help regarding the reading, meditating and experiencing the understanding of same . . .

The holy Benedictine monk Archabbot Douglas R. Nowicki , O.S.B. of the Saint Vincent Archabbey in Latrobe, Pennsylvania here in the United States . . . recommends that we . . . slow down radically . . . when reflecting on inspired material . . . so as to . . . *open up freely *. . . to the treasury of insights contained therein . . . he goes on further to share with beautiful simplicity:

Lectio Divina (divine reading)
Archabbot Douglas R. Nowicki , O.S.B. (Order of St. Benedict)

“It is the **monastic insight **that reading, if it be authentic, cannot be undertaken simply with the eyes and the mind. Rather it must involve the whole person: mind, heart, body and spirit. It is reading not so much for information as for formation, that is, for encounter with the living God in this moment in such a way that one’s heart catches fire and one’s life is transformed … In St. Benedict’s day reading a sacred or spiritual text was practiced not so much for the sake of ‘information,’ but rather in order to be ‘formed’: that is, to be inwardly changed or shaped. …

Thus the aim of lectio divina (divine reading), i.e., pondering the material in a slow, prayerful way, is to dispose ourselves to welcome God’s ever-present grace and His efforts to conquer our hearts and transform us more and more into a holy people . . . ”
​

. . . all for Jesus+
. . . thank You Dear Blessed Lord+
. . . praise God from Whom all blessings flow+
:harp:
​
 
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